


Make It In America

by Mechanical_Animal (PlutotheAlien)



Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: Cheating, Complicated Relationships, Drama, F/F, F/M, Friendship, Jori Friendship, Love, Smut, alternative universe, everyone made it except Tori and Beck
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:28:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 45,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25231633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlutotheAlien/pseuds/Mechanical_Animal
Summary: "You see, Tori, there's three types of bad people," Jade started, still comfortably lying on her side as she looked up at a distraught Tori."What are these types?" Tori asked, voice shaky, tears in her eyes."Well, there's bad people like me. We don't hide how bad we are. We don't care that we are bad either. Then there are bad people like Beck. These people are wolves in sheep's clothing. They act all nice and innocent but they're the devil."Jade rolled off the bed and walked towards Tori. The fact that she was bare didn't seem to bother her one bit. In fact, she seemed comfortable. She gently grabbed Tori's face."Then there's bad people like you.""What? I'm not a bad person!""Oh, yes you are. You're the worst type of bad person there is." Jade tilted her head ever so slightly, lips mere milimeters from Tori's. "You don't know just how bad you are."
Relationships: Beck Oliver/Jade West, Beck Oliver/Tori Vega, Tori Vega/Jade West
Comments: 30
Kudos: 226





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So, here’s some context you can definitely skip if that bores you.
> 
> I was washing the dishes and as I always do, I put a show on the television to fill in the silence of spreading soapy water on dishes I didn’t use at all (yay I live with my family). I always do this with a show I like and have seen a dozen times, so I never have to turn around every five seconds to follow the plot. 
> 
> This time, I put on Victorious. Again. 
> 
> I was on season 3, episode 10 and 11 (according to the official wiki): Tori Goes Platinum. I usually skip that one because it’s part of the episodes I like the least. To me, it’s cliché, it’s boring and not as entertaining as the other ones. It goes exactly where you know it’ll go. Also, it’s frustrating sometimes because I always think, “If I were in Jade’s position, I never would’ve let Tori on stage. I would’ve taken that opportunity.” Maybe I’m a bad person, maybe I see things differently, I don’t know.
> 
> Anyway, as I washed the dishes, devil horns grew out of my skull and I thought, “How can I make this interesting to myself?”
> 
> And this story was born.
> 
> This is obviously set in an alternative universe happening years later, where everyone is a grown adult. I know technically, Sam and Cat came after Victorious, but I’ve never watched it.
> 
> Obvious little things I say at the beginning of most of my stories:  
> 1) English is not my first language. I am not using it as an excuse to justify mistakes, incomprehension or laziness at editing and revising, I am just mentioning it. I do very meticulously revise and edit, to make sure everything is pretty and tolerable.  
> 2) Also, I am writing this as I go. I don’t have a notebook with a detailed plan (like I usually do).  
> 3) I know some writers love to set dates as to when they’ll update, but I can’t. My writing is based on whether my brain is inspired or not. I’ll do my best to update the story as often as possible.
> 
> Now, you’re ready to enjoy this fic. I will post it on other platforms too.
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> (Yeah, this prologue is like all exposition, I’m sorry.)

When you're a teenager, the words "rare", "hard" and "nearly impossible" have no meaning to you, especially when you go to a performing arts school. When people around you tell you how hard it is to live from your art, how hard it is to achieve your dreams of having your name written down in history books, your dreams of being the next legend, you don't want to hear it. You don't want to hear the adults tell you how rare, hard and nearly impossible that is.

When you're a teenager, you're narcissistic, selfish and stuck in a semi-permanent stage of life where all you do is dream.

When you're a college student, it's a little bit different. You are, at first, a teenager thrown into the world of adults based on a technicality (what teenager is absolutely mature at the age of 18, come on). When you're a college student, the words "rare", "hard" and "nearly impossible" hit you differently. You're worried that what the adults have said all along is true, but you don't want to believe it. Believing it is admitting that you might be wasting time and money on nothing. You're worried that your best years as an artist are solely in this stage of life where you perform for a grade.

When you're a college student, you're terrified you might not achieve your dreams like you dreamed you would. When you're a college student, you are desperately clinging to a dream hoping you'll find some satisfaction at the end. Especially if you choose a major related to the arts in any way. Because you know what they say: you will have bills (and loans) to pay once college is over. And when you live in Los Angeles, you want to be able to pay your bills and keep a roof over your head.

Beck genuinely thought he'd live his dream of being an actor the moment he left college. Hollywood Arts had been great, college had been even better. While in college, he had managed to get a role in a big theatre piece that had given him some local attention, even though his role had been secondary. Things got better at the end of college, when he finally graduated. By a miracle he didn't expect, he had gotten the primary role in a new television show. Pay had been decent for him and had given him the means to move to Los Angeles with his long-time girlfriend.

It was like a dream come true for the lovers. Beck would have his role in the series, his girlfriend would officially start her singing career. And they'd support each other. And they'd love each other always.

Somehow, it all just went downhill. Beck's show not only got cancelled after one season, it also got removed from the air and never picked up by any streaming service. Truth be told, it never had the best ratings, critics finding the plot to be boring or cliché, the characters bland like water but not as refreshing. His name had gotten forgotten and finding work was hard. Sometimes, he got lucky to find auditions. Sadly, he never got picked, even for a commercial. With rent and bills stacking up every month, the money saved from his short time on television dwindled massively. Now, they struggled to make ends meet.

Things were somehow worse for his girlfriend. You'd think the beautiful and once legendary Tori Vega would have a wonderful singing career by now. After all, wasn't it what everyone said would happen? She already had the miraculous backstory: young girl with an amazing secret talent gets enrolled in a performing arts school by chance, her talent is always recognized, she gets a scholarship in college where her talent makes her stand out, she even gets a manager who promises her the world...

You'd think that was the universe sending you a message.

Well, apparently not. When Tori finished college, she focused full time on her career. She did everything right; she recorded songs, put them online, approached labels, performed at different places here and there, released an album. But all of this never got her anywhere. She was stuck doing the same thing but without the progress. Labels weren't interested in her, the numbers of plays on her songs were not as impressive as they should be, her following was barely modest. In the end, when her contract with her manager ended, he dropped her as a client. There went all of her chances, there went the financing, the opportunities, the dreams.

Just like Beck, reality started to hit her in the face. After living financial bliss for years, the bills started harassing her the way they harassed her boyfriend. And she watched with him as the savings got smaller and smaller, the credit cards debts bigger and bigger. She watched as nothing went the way she hoped it would. And how she hated it, how it killed her inside. She went from special to nobody so quickly. Right now, she should be living the big life with her actor boyfriend in a penthouse or a mansion, each worth millions. She shouldn't be moving in a small worn-down one-bedroom apartment that still managed to be a little bit above their budget. What the fuck happened? Where did it all go wrong?

That's what she wished she could ask her mother every time they talked on the phone.

Tori used to speak to her mom almost every day, sometimes twice a day not including all the texts they exchanged daily. They were close and she was blessed with a supportive mother, who somehow was becoming less and less supportive as time went by. That dwindling support came from the fact that Tori's mom cared for her, but it didn't make it any easier or better.

Tori was holding back tears as her mom offered her to come live back home with Beck again, help her get on her feet and go towards a more secure path. Tori could hear a computer mouse click sound in the background as her mother made the same suggestions she made so often. _Go back to school, I can secure you a job because I know someone, your dad can help you get into police academy_ , etc., etc., etc. Tori wasn't sure when she had gotten so prideful, she would just refuse to do all of this, and sometimes even resent her mother for offering. The logical part of Tori was fully aware that this was a mother being a mother, trying to help her child. The prideful part of Tori saw this as the confirmation that she had failed where people said they would succeed.

"Why not ask Trina for help?"

This one was the worst offer her mother could make her. Tori hadn't spoken to Trina in years for the same reason she refused to accept her mother's offers or help. Pride and ego. Because watching Trina's surprising success was just confirming Tori's surprising failure.

"Why would I ask Trina for help?" Tori asked.

"I mean, she could find you a job at the network she films her show. She could get you a role on a TV show."

_Yes, mom, bury the knife deeper into my skull, the pain excites me_ , Tori was thinking sarcastically, shoving one hand in the pocket of her jacket. She looked at the other people waiting for a bus that would be full, on such a cold and rainy evening. Why was she so annoyed about taking the bus when it was environmentally friendly and not a real big deal? Hopefully, someone would give her an answer, because she needed one.

"Mom, I swear I'll be fine." Tori was glad years of acting lessons had made her such a good actress, because she could just as well lie her way out of certain situations. Like this one. Her voice was normal and steady, but in truth she had been wiping tears and keeping her head down to avoid attention from the strangers next to her. If the rain had been hard enough, she would've acted like it was water droplets.

"Tori..." Her mom sighed heavily. Strange. Usually, her mom would just say okay, repeated that she loved her and hang up.

Tori didn't like the silence after that sigh. She anxiously waited for her mom to continue talking.

"Mom? Are you okay?"

"Tori, you have to come home."

"Mom, I don't want to be a bother."

"That's not what I mean. You _have_ to come home. You can't go on like this. Not you."

Tori wasn't sure if this tone was disappointment, desperation or a mix of both. Either way, it was something she didn't like to hear.

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean, sweetie. I know you do. I'm tired of being scared for you, I'm tired of knowing that you're going through this."

Tori scoffed, trying to lower her voice not to attract attention.

"Mom, things will get better. Beck had an audition this morning and I know he'll get the role!"

It was a role in a little show. While Beck wouldn't have the longest time on screen or the best lines, the pay would be enough for the bills and hopefully, would make people remember he existed. During the show, he had had a very small yet decent following on social media. Tori was certain all it would take for him was to be seen again, to show his talent.

"You say this all the time, and yet here we are."

"Mom, I have a good feeling this time."

"You also say this all the time."

Right. This conversation was repetitive enough that her mom was already sick of having it.

"I want you to come home, go back to school, get a job and start your life. You've worked so hard, Tori, and you're smart. You don't deserve this."

Tori was quiet for a split second, knowing her mother was smart and knowing she was just speaking the truth. She needed an excuse, quickly.

"Beck would never agree to this."

Her mom was quiet again on the other side of the line. Tori wished she could see her and see what she looked like, what her face looked like, what her body language was. Tori wished her mother could see her and understand what she was going through and thinking.

"Tori, tell Beck you can't go on like this, that you're accepting your mother's offer to go home and back to school. I'll help you find something to study so you can get a job."

"I already have a job." Hell, she had two. Just like Beck did. Four paychecks every two weeks and somehow still in the red.

"Tori, you juggle between being a barista and a waitress. Those are college jobs, not adult jobs."

Now that hurt. That felt degrading. Never had her mother spoken to her in such a way. Her mother had always been supporting, helpful, optimistic even just for the sake of giving her daughter hope. Now she was being insulting for whatever reason.

"There are plenty of adults with these jobs, mom."

"How many of them do these jobs even though they have a supportive family willing to help them achieve higher goals and a better life?"

Tori was quiet. Her mom had a point she couldn't refute. It didn't make her comment any less slightly ignorant and showed just how privileged she was, but Tori wasn't going to start an argument now.

"Mom, things will get better. Just trust me."

"I do trust you, Tori. I spent my entire life as a mother trusting you. I just want you to see things the way I do. You can't afford to live like this, chasing dreams that will clearly not happen."

"Yes, they will!" Shit, she had shouted and gotten looks from the strangers near her at the bus stop. Tori hated this commute. The bus always managed to be full, but also always managed to take all the time in the world to come, regardless of the weather or the traffic.

"Tori, not everyone gets to live their dream and that's okay. That's part of life."

"So you just want me to stop trying?"

"Yes. At least, long enough to secure something else. You can sing as a hobby and keep putting your songs online. But, honey, you're going to want more one day. One day, you'll wish you weren't always paying back someone, you're going to want children and they're expensive. They're going to need a larger space than a one-bedroom and you'll want some form of financial security for them."

"Mom..."

"I'm not going to ask you anymore after today. Just come home. My friend needs a secretary for her dental practice and she's willing to take you in even if you go to school at the same time. Tell Beck you want to move on and that he's obviously invited so he can also get on his feet."

"Mom, I have to go, the bus is here."

Before her mother could say anything, Tori hung up. She threw her phone in her purse. It was a lie. The bus was perhaps another ten minutes away, but Tori felt like if she had continued this conversation, she would've ended up agreeing. Truth was, her mother had said nothing but the truth. Tori was exhausted, tired of her unstable schedule at one job, the boredom at the other. She was tired of wondering how she'd pay that bill or that bill, how much money she'd have left after paying this debt or watching interests accumulate. She was sick of watching Beck fail and fail again, come back home always angrier, go to work or an audition always more exhausted. Tori herself was tired of putting songs online and get so little traffic. She was sick of this life she hadn't chosen, of this pride people wanted her to swallow.

The ride on the bus home, wet and stuck against so many strangers. While that usually frustrated her, Tori managed to bottle up her emotions until she got home. She didn't let anger, frustration and sadness crack the mask of disinterest she wore to avoid looks from strangers. Even when she got home, she barely registered that she was doing everything like a robot, so used to the same repetitive old. She crossed the front door and quickly took off her wet jacket, feeling her damp hair between her fingers. Kicking her shoes off, she dropped everything by the door. Then she warmed up something to eat. Then she showered and watched two episodes of a Netflix show.

Tori felt empty the whole evening. That is, until she got ready for bed.

The moment her head hit the pillow, she cried. She just wailed completely, this time not hiding her face in her pillow like she usually did. This time, she needed to freely express her emotions, just to calm herself down, give herself a little reboot. Tomorrow would be better. Beck would tell her he got the role, and they'd be happy again.

*******

Of course, Beck didn't get the role. Beck knew how it worked. He performed, waited for the casting manager to say something, got promised a phone call and then silence for the next months. It didn't take a genius to understand what that meant. You suck. You're not good enough. You thought you were the best back in high school and college, but no you're not. You're clearly not that person you thought you were.

Beck parked the car in front of the apartment he shared with his girlfriend, feeling the rays of sunshine hit him in the face. Damn did he hate this job. Stuck walking around a mall all night took a toll on him. He was always tired, always bored, always unsatisfied. So, when it was time to do his job as a bartender, he was always grumpy, angry, and the tips showed that.

Beck stared at the front door; it was time to face Tori and give her the bad news. He was ashamed. He had promised her the world, a dream, and look at them now.

It was around 8 am, and he knew she would be awake by now, getting ready to go to work. They would, as always, awkwardly look at each other, exchange boring platitudes, then he would go to bed and she would go to work.

They couldn't keep doing this, honestly.

Beck stepped inside the apartment. He took his shoes off and saw Tori eating cereal while on her phone. Was she watching a YouTube video, something on Netflix? Was she looking for inspiration or obsessively looking at her statistics or analytics? Maybe the answer was yes to all of those questions.

"Hey," she said, sounding uninterested.

"Morning. How did you sleep?" Beck asked.

Tori looked tired, her face a little bit puffy around the eyes.

"I slept fine. How was work?"

Beck looked dead inside. He forced a little smile on his lips.

"Uneventful, thank God."

Tori nodded. He heard music play from her phone and a voice talking. That was a tutorial.

"Learning how to produce now?" Beck put his lunch bag on the counter of the kitchen.

"I have to. I can't afford a producer and there's only so much I can do with a piano."

"Ask André."

"He charges."

"He's your friend."

"He gave me a friendship discount."

And as insulting and hurtful as it was, Tori understood that André was actually being nice based on his own circumstances. Just like herself and Beck, he had bills to pay and a life to prepare with his fiancée. Plus, Tori was sick of begging or looking pitiful. André was always encouraging but she could see how he felt awful for her and would help her out if he had the means. He was lucky he had managed to make a name for himself underground and had enough clients to sustain himself. She fully understood him and his reasons for doing what he was doing.

She was still, once in a while, pissed off.

Beck yawned.

"Go to bed. I'll try not to make any noise while I get ready." To serve people with weird names their coffee.

Beck nodded, and Tori bit back her tongue. She had spent some time while making her breakfast thinking about her mom's offer. It was becoming more and more appealing. Even more when she watched how Beck didn't mention his audition and instead lazily slumped off to their bedroom to sleep. She wanted to ask him what he thought, but perhaps now wasn't the best time. Tori didn't want him to get angry, she didn't want him to either go on a rant or give her a dirty look while he disappeared. Another time, then.

Wishing him a restful sleep, she got ready for work.

*******

Tori's shift ended excruciatingly long hours later and she sighed with satisfaction. At this hour, she would usually rush home to get ready for her shift at the restaurant, but her manager had switched it with someone else's at the last minute and she had the rest of the day off. She would use it to work on her music or maybe consider her mother's offer. Maybe her mother was right: maybe it was time for Tori Vega to accept singing as a hobby and find a different career path, something that didn't solely involve handing coffee to strangers. Every day, for every customer, Tori wished she was on the other side of the counter. She wished she was the one to walk out with coffee, not handing it. She wished most of her colleagues weren't younger than her and she wished people didn't give her such weird looks for working here. Or maybe she was imagining the last part, who knew.

Tori walked to the break room and towards her locker. She unlocked it quickly, noting how bare it was, since she had never taken the time to make it her own. Truth be told, she didn't see the point. Still, it was so strange to have a locker like that, when she had spent years with one she had customized.

Tori grabbed her stuff and took her phone out of her purse. She looked at it and saw she had gotten a phone call from a number she didn't know, and that number had left a message. On her way out of the little coffee shop, she pressed play to listen to the voicemail.

"Tori Vega, hi, how are you?" This voice. Tori hadn't heard it officially in years. On the radio, on television, scrolling down social media? Often. But directly at her? Like right now? No.

"It's Jade West. I know it's been awhile, but call me, I need to talk to you."


	2. Chapter 1

Damn, that show was bad. Jade had seen better writing at Hollywood Arts. It always blew her mind how professional screenwriters often didn’t know how to write, while high school students did a better job, and for free. Maybe the nuance was the freedom the students had, which the screenwriters didn’t possess, unfortunately. Professional screenwriters had to take into consideration time, budget, resources. Hollywood Arts students had the power of writing anything with a supportive teacher in the background to guide them, and often their graded work would never be played on stage.

Still, this show was lucky to have gotten an actor as good as Beck. His character was an asshole the plot struggled to turn into a good person, but Beck managed to deliver every line, every sentence like a king. Jade was still wondering how a producer or casting manager could look at his acting in such an awful show and still decide not to hire him. Beck had the power to make a bad show decent with just his acting. It made the scenes with his bland co-star easier to watch. It made caring for the character he played just a little bit more possible.

As far as Jade knew, based mostly on internet research, poor Beck hadn’t been on anything, not even a commercial, in years since the show’s cancellation. If she hadn’t spent the last decade in the entertainment industry, she’d be angry and confused. She’d be complaining online to people, looking for blogs and forums and communities of people who thought exactly what she thought. That wasn’t the case, fortunately. Jade had spent enough time in this industry to realize that life was unfair, and that talent wasn’t as necessary as it used to be to make it. Sometimes it took luck, sometimes it took talent and sometimes it still took skills under the covers.

Just thinking about all these things was enough to make her lose the motivation to finish the episode. Jade sighed and stopped the episode to get herself something to drink. She was glad to have bought the entire first season before the show got removed from the air and impossible to find, unless someone used alternative methods. She had seen it a thousand times, and she frankly hated it, but she watched it over and over again because Beck was in it and apparently, that was still enough for her. Damn.

As she filled a glass with water, Jade found herself staring outside her window from the kitchen. Her house was on a hill (because apparently it was a trend amongst people within her tax bracket) and the view of the mountains in her backyard was relaxing. Even though this house was obnoxiously big and much more than she needed, she liked it. It was isolated, she had no neighbours. If she wanted to swim in her pool, she had nature as a guard to keep the creeps away from her, and the sunset was amazing to watch.

Jade had learned very early in her career to enjoy the little things and not worry about things she couldn’t control.

Just as the young woman brought her glass of water to her lips, her cellphone rang in the living room. If she had brought it with her to the kitchen, she wouldn’t be rushing back to catch the call. Another thing she had learned in this industry was to avoid letting her voicemail if it was important. People were busy, and not everyone could return phone calls right away or in the following days, especially managers, agents, publicists, etc. People also had no patience. If you didn’t answer, they’d move on right away.

Obviously, Jade had a manager who handled all of that, but she knew people would still try to contact her personally if it was very important. Besides, the next few months were going to be busy for her, just like they were before her hiatus. She would get calls from producers, her manager, her publicist, pretty much the whole world while she planned her comeback.

A comeback to music, after two years of break. Was it even possible for her? With how fast the music world moved, was it possible for her to come back with music and conquer the charts again? Was her career over, should she focus on acting or just settle on directing movies and TV shows? Maybe.

She had had a very nice career these past years. Success had been almost instant after she’d sung for the Platinum Music Awards. Jade saw her life drastically change overnight, going from an average student to a popstar. She watched as her songs charted and broke records. Then she had had the opportunity to show her acting skills, becoming a praised actress and later on a praised screenwriter and director. After enjoying two years of vacation, Jade was ready to begin the next phase of her life. Free from the oppressive managers, she could dive into music closer to herself and her personality.

Jade grabbed her phone, expecting to be answering her manager. The new woman in charge of her career was sweet yet straight to point, and completely willing to give Jade all the creative control while she did the work in the background. But to her surprise, the number wasn’t the one of her manager praising her for finally returning to music. It was Tori Vega’s number. She was actually returning her call. Jade had called on a whim, after feeling bored while planning her new comeback. Plus, Jade had called around three hours ago and left a voicemail. She didn’t think Tori would answer her so quickly.

“Hello?” Jade said as she answered the phone. Damn, the conversation hadn’t started but she was already smiling.

“Jade?” Tori’s voice was surprised, shocked. It sounded a bit deeper, and Jade wondered if that slight change in voice tone had affected Tori’s singing voice too.

“Vega! Thanks for calling me back so quickly.”

“How did you get my number?”

How polite.

Jade sighed. “I asked your sister, who then put me in contact with your mom, who then gave me your number. How’s it going, how are you?”

There was silence. Jade could only begin to imagine what Tori was thinking right about now. It could be anything. Tori could even hang up the phone and block her number.

“I’m fine… I’m really fine.”

“Great!”

Tori’s voice sounded hesitant, and there was nervous laughter on the other side of the line.

“Is there a reason why you decided to call me?” Tori asked.

“Yes, actually. I want to see you. When are you free?”

“Um… Today might be best, if that’s okay with you.”

“That’s awesome! I’m texting you an address, see you in two hours.”

Tori agreed. After the usual polite goodbyes, they both hung up the phone. Jade climbed the stairs to her bathroom to shower and change.

*******

Tori regretted taking the bus to get to the place Jade had asked her to go to. She had expected Jade to text her the address of a fast food place, a restaurant, or any place that wasn’t creepy. But of course, that wasn’t Jade enough. Jade was creepy. Jade was scary. Jade was beautifully mysterious and terrifying. Therefore, it was on brand for Jade to ask to see her in the parking lot of an abandoned mall. There was absolutely nothing here except for a few empty parked cars. And Tori was alone with no car, at the mercy of the world and the unknown. Great.

Tori waited fifteen minutes, quickly scrolling through Jade’s social media. Aside from the usual pictures and posts that were normal for a celebrity like Jade, there was nothing. No mention of future projects, no new music, no endorsements. Just articles about her getting a new management team and the fans begging for new music to listen to. Tori couldn’t squash the jealousy that took over her every time a fan proclaimed love or begged for a new song in the comment section. This should be happening to her, not Jade.

There were days where Tori wondered if things would’ve been different if she had played along with Mason Thornesmith, let him do his thing even if it meant acting like a diva and getting criticized or despised by people she cared about. Looking at Jade and seeing all the success the woman had told her it would’ve been a smart choice.

Looking up, Tori saw a car park near her in the parking lot. A tall woman stepped out of the car, wearing a leather jacket and combat boots. That was Jade for sure. And she looked as good there as she did on her social media. Jade had kept her hair dyed black, which complimented her pale complexion. Even after all these years, Jade preferred dark colours for her makeup and Tori admitted she looked beautiful.

“You’ve been waiting for a while?” Jade asked, sitting on the hood of her car.

“Just a few minutes,” Tori answered, forcing a smile. Tori wasn’t sure what to do, what to think. This was real. This was happening.

Jade looked around the empty parking lot. Tori was alone and there was nothing around her. She couldn’t see a car anywhere near the young woman.

“Did you walk here or…”

“Took the bus. You know, it’s better for the environment.”

Tori was smiling nervously, clutching her bag. Jade wondered if it was her being nervous caused by seeing an old classmate, a celebrity or something else, like a secret Tori didn’t want her to know.

“That’s awesome of you. Tori Vega, thoughtful as ever.” Jade figured playing along was better than asking more questions. Besides, she was here for business, not simply to catch up on her. “Hopefully you managed to get your driver’s licence without hitting anyone.”

That had meant to be a joke, to lighten up the atmosphere a little. Jade noticed Tori was incredibly tense, gripping her bag to the point where it looked ready to break. Tori didn’t laugh at all, however, and that somehow got Jade worried.

“So, why the creepy parking lot?” Tori asked.

Jade looked around. She didn’t find this place creepy. It was empty, isolated. Perfect to do anything without being seen by paparazzi. If there was one thing that she hated about her current life, it was those vultures. As much as she understood they had to make a living, she had to live, and it would be nice to be able to go grocery shopping without covering herself from head to toe. Always having to look over her shoulder for a camera took a toll on her.

“I needed to talk to you. And I didn’t want anyone to see or hear us.” Jade shrugged. “How are you getting home?”

“I’ll take the bus.” Tori stood in front of Jade, looking around. This looked like the place where people made drug deals or solicited a prostitute. This wasn’t the place to catch up with an old classmate or do any kind of honest business. “Anyway, what’s that big thing you couldn’t say over the phone?”

Instead of answering her, Jade jumped off the hood of the car, walking back towards the driver’s side of her car. “Where do you live? I’ll give you a ride home.”

“So, you’re just going to avoid answering me?”

Tori was getting frustrated. The bus ride to get here had taken over an hour, in the heat and the awful smell of people packed like sardines. She wasn’t going to continue with this conversation if Jade was simply going to mess with her like that.

Jade leaned against her car, staring at Tori. Ten years ago, Jade would’ve reluctantly admitted that Tori had been a cute teenage girl. Today, the young woman was damn beautiful. She looked simply ravishing in her jeans and T-shirt. Her long brown hair flew with the light wind, her eyes were soft to look at.

Looking away, Jade drummed her fingers on the hood of the car. “Was singing always a dream you had?”

Tori saw that as a weird question if her reaction told Jade anything. The young Latina frowned, now visibly showing displeasure and annoyance. Tori wasn’t patient anymore clearly.

“What … uh… Why are you asking this?”

“Because I fucking hated you in high school.”

Tori was shocked speechless. She hadn’t expected that at all. Tori had known Jade hadn’t particularly liked her in high school, often going out of her way to make her experience at Hollywood Arts miserable. Tori had assumed Jade disliked her or acted like she did. She never thought Jade downright _hated_ her.

“Wow, you _hated_ me?” Tori sat on the hood of the car. “Why?”

“Because everyone who attended Hollywood Arts auditioned and you just barged in and took all of the attention. You took all the roles in plays, all the solos… You changed the rules, you snooped around, you put your nose where it wasn’t wanted… I worked hard just to get enrolled at that school. I had to work even harder to get a quarter of everything you had handed to you on a silver platter.” Jade bitterly chuckled. “First week of school and you put your lips on my boyfriend.”

“It was for Sikowitz’s stupid little exercise.” And it was more than ten years ago. Tori carefully didn’t mention it. Tori also chose not to mention the coffee bath she had received from Jade in that same week. Kissing her boyfriend seemed like more than reasonable payback in hindsight.

Before Tori could say anything, Jade continued. “I always wondered if singing was really something you wanted or if you just went with it because everyone adored you. Kind of how Trina does anything she can for fame.”

And in Trina’s case, this mentality had worked perfectly well. It had taken less than a few years for her to go from untalented inconvenience, to (slightly problematic) youtuber, to influencer and now reality TV star.

Tori looked at the asphalt of the parking lot. She had never thought about that. Up until she had entered Hollywood Arts, she had been happy with settling with a simple life. Go to school, go to college, get a job, start a family, live life, retire and die. The eccentricities of a life under the spotlights had been Trina’s things. Until Tori had gotten a taste of what could be a possible future. It became addicting. The attention, the compliments, the freedom and the power of the stage. Who would turn that down?

“I guess it wasn’t until I saw my potential that I realized I could do it.” Tori looked at the empty lot and the closed mall. They felt like a reflection of her life. The mall was her dream: closed, in pieces, discoloured and vulnerable to the harsh weather. The parking lot was how she was feeling: lonely, useless, empty. That had to be cruel irony for Jade of all people to bring her here.

“Thanks for being honest.” Jade smiled. “Didn’t think it was part of the Tori brand.”

Tori smiled shyly, keeping her eyes on her shoes. Was her answer honest? Was her answer her telling the truth or her saying what Jade wanted to know, what _she_ wanted to know?

“Ten years, people change. Speaking of, how’s life, popstar?”

Jade smirked, her car keys rolling between her fingers. She never thought she’d be driving such an eccentric SUV, but she had learned quite early that something subtle did quite the job to drive around LA incognito. The windows were tinted, the SUV was a common one seen in Los Angeles and it was quiet on the road.

“Funny you say that. I actually came to you with news.”

“Finally!” Tori chuckled. “Come on, spit them out!”

“Get in the car first, I’m driving you home.”

This time, Tori obeyed. Curious as ever, clearly, even after a decade. On the road, after being given quick indications of where Tori lived, Jade started driving and told Tori her upcoming projects.

“You know how I’ve been quiet for the past two years?” Jade asked.

“Yeah. Your hiatus, right?”

Tori had heard about after spending some time on Jade’s social media. While fans praised Jade’s singing abilities and her acting skills, many begged every day for new songs.

“Right. Well, I’m coming back to music. And I want my first comeback song to be a duet with another singer.”

“Really? That’s awesome! I heard there’s this rapper who’s really getting attention and—”

“I don’t want a feature, Vega. I want a duet with a talented singer. And I was wondering if you would do it with me.”

Tori stared at Jade in shock, her cute mouth hanging open.

“Me?”

“Yeah. I wanted to ask Cat but apparently she prefers to focus on med school.”

“Oh my God, Jade, I—wait, Cat is in med school?”

“Yeah, you didn’t know? Apparently, she wants to be a psychiatrist.”

Who would’ve known Cat was smart under all this airhead act? Jade actually felt proud and checked on the girl regularly. She was excited to see Cat use her potential to help others, and it was weird to see her study so much, have all this complicated knowledge, especially since Jade recalled how the girl couldn’t say _Hawaii_.

“That’s awesome!” Tori gasped. “Oh my God, you want to make a song with me?”

“Yeah. Don’t tell me ten years have damaged your memory.” Jade chuckled. “So, you’re in or not?”

Tori could only silently nod at first, until she shrieked. “Yes, yes, yes!”

“Good. I’ll text you when it’s time to start working on the song. Just keep it a secret please. The comeback is meant to be a surprise and I’m carefully working on it.”

Tori swore to tell no one.

Then there was silence. This incredibly awkward silence. After bonding like old classmates, there was this unsettling atmosphere slowly rising in the car between them, and it squashed Tori’s joy. Jade and herself had a lot of animosity between each other for various reasons, and Tori suspected Jade’s honesty from a few minutes ago was just the surface of all the buried issues in their relationship.

“Are you and Beck still together?” Jade suddenly asked, eyes focused on the road.

Tori had somehow expected this question. If Jade and Beck’s break up had been messy enough, Beck’s way of completely severing ties with Jade had been worse. Never had Tori witnessed the anger Beck was capable of before that day ten years ago. It suddenly occurred to Tori that Beck would not be happy to find out about this. He had pretty much cursed Jade and he would do anything to stop this possible collaboration. It wouldn’t matter to him that this was an opportunity for Tori; if Jade as involved, he would blow up again.

Beck couldn’t find out. At all.

“Um yeah,” Tori answered quickly.

“Cool.”

And that was it. No sneaky remark, no cold comment, no insult. Then again, ten years was a long time to hold a grudge over a high school relationship.

Tori suddenly got worried. Was Jade holding a grudge? Could she be lying and slowly preparing an evil plan to humiliate Tori in front of millions of people?

Tori mentally slapped herself. They were both adults now, no way Jade was still angry because her high school ex-boyfriend had decided to date a girl she hated while Jade herself went on to become a superstar. Jade could do a lot of things but that felt unlikely.

Jade parked the car in front of an apartment building. The place was not very glamorous, and she was surprised Tori lived there. Objectively, there was nothing wrong with the orange-beige building, but Jade had always pictured Tori living in a cute adobe house, or a condo. Not that.

The doors to her SUV unlocked, shaking Jade out of her thoughts.

“There you go. I’ll call you in a few days to meet with my manager,” she promised.

Tori exited the SUV, thanking Jade and waving her goodbye. Jade watched Tori get inside the building and disappear, and she drove off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be sure to leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed it, and stay tuned for the next chapter!


	3. Chapter 2

Tori was honestly not sure what to think. Should she be angry, disappointed, sad or terrified? A month. Thirty fucking days where Jade hadn’t called or texted in a month, after promising to give her news in less than a few days. That had to be the most enraging thing Tori had lived recently, and Beck had noticed her mood had worsened over the days.

Tori sat on the couch, glaring her phone, barely hearing Beck call her. Jade had to be messing with her, playing a game with her patience. She had the power to give Tori a career and she was using it to cruelly toy with her.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” Beck was asking as he sat on the couch next to her.

 **J:** _ Meeting tomorrow at nine. Here’s the address. _

That text message was wrong. Seeing that cold and quick message, with no apology or acknowledgement that a whole month had passed was angering Tori. She hid her phone from her boyfriend, turning it off and putting it next to her.

“Nothing. Just work.”

Beck nodded, directing his attention back to the television. Tori had to stop worrying about Jade’s intentions. Were they as malicious as she thought? Did Jade even have malicious intentions? Jade had all this power, all this fame, she had no reasons to try and make Tori’s life more miserable than it already was.

Tori looked at Beck. Maybe Jade wanted him, and she was getting closer to Tori to get to him. Beck certainly wouldn’t get back with Jade, regardless of the circumstances.

Tori sighed, standing up and excusing herself to go to the bathroom. She was paranoid. She was going insane. Jade had no intentions outside of making music with Tori. The end. That was it. Tori would have to get this through her skull if she wanted to work with Jade properly.

Leaving the bathroom, Tori caught Beck practising his lines for another audition. Poor Beck still had no idea that Jade had contacted Tori, and Tori still didn’t want to tell him, no matter how bad she felt. Tori was terrified of Beck’s possible reaction, and if he wanted her not to go through with it, it meant losing another opportunity. The alternative Tori was considering was her mother’s offer, and that was something Beck wouldn’t accept easily.

“I’m doing this for us,” Tori murmured as she quickly sat back down next to him. She didn’t ask him what he was doing, what he was rehearsing. It would just stress him out. She settled for watching him rehearse, convincing herself that things would get better.

***

Tori thanked the Uber driver as she stepped out of the car. Usually, she would’ve taken the bus to get to the place Jade had planned the meeting, but fearing being late or having to wake up way too early, she had settled for an Uber, without telling Beck. Hopefully it wouldn’t break the bank. Besides, how serious would it be if she met Jade by getting off a bus? The first time she had gotten away with it by lying, but she didn’t want to keep going to that direction. Tori Vega couldn’t restart her career on lies.

Tori scoffed, looking at the sky quickly. She was already lying to most people around her, including her family and her boyfriend. Even herself. She had been for years now, telling everyone that everything was fine or that everything would get better. In truth, it wasn’t the case. Not until a month ago, when Jade had basically handed her the key to a career.

The outside of the building the address corresponded to didn’t look like what a professional artist management company looked like. Tori had always imagined a very tall skyscraper with reflective windows. Instead, it looked like a renovated factory, made of red brick with very large windows. Tori still entered the building, relieved to be welcomed by a sweet secretary in a black shirt and red tie. The young man gave her a smile, looking away from his computer.

“Welcome to Managold Management, how may I assist you?” He said.

Tori forced a smile, clutching her bag nervously.

“I was told to come here at nine,” she said. “I have a meeting.”

The young raven-haired man raised an eyebrow as he looked down at his computer, typing something as Tori spoke.

“Are you here for the job interview?” He asked after a moment.

“No. Actually, I was told to come here by one of your artists?” Tori tentatively mentioned. How silly must she look in front of this young man. To his perspective, she was a random young woman coming in from the streets, claiming to have a meeting organized by an artist this company represented.

“Which one of our artists invited you here?”

The man looked skeptical and the way he asked her the question was also skeptical. Tori just felt silly.

“It was Jade West.”

Clearly surprised, the young man quickly typed something on his computer before looking back at Tori.

“There’s unfortunately nothing here that tells me you have an appointment with her today.”

Tori frowned. Had Jade lied? Had Jade simply sent her to some random place to make her look insane?

“Could you call Jade maybe? Tell her Tori Vega is here.”

The man almost scoffed, but quickly kept his composure.

“You want me to call Ms. West?”

Tori nodded.

“Unfortunately, that’s not possible. Miss, if you have no business here, please leave. I’d hate to have to call security on you.”

“Wait. I’ll call Jade myself.”

The secretary shrugged and watched as Tori quickly dialled Jade’s number. Jade picked up right away. After a quick conversation, the phone on the secretary’s desk rang. The man picked it up, answered, then nodded.

“Take the elevator, just go up to the last floor.”

Thanking him, Tori made her way to the elevator and entered. She sighed in relief that this was apparently true and not a bad joke from Jade.

The elevator opened directly to a large floor, with floor to ceiling windows that allowed anyone watching a view of the other buildings. Tori had noticed right away that the overall theme of the entire place was modern yet casual, but the atmosphere was eerily serious. The office was perhaps the apogee of this. The furniture and decorating were very modern with subtle spots of strange decoration that had perhaps sentimental value, but everything was placed to keep things professional. Tori felt destabilized at best: was she supposed to chill or work?

Tori saw Jade sitting on a little lounge sofa in front of a desk, where a woman sat on the other side. The woman had brown hair in a pixie cut and was wearing a white suit with a red shirt underneath. They both turned to look at Tori.

“Ah! You must be the no-name girl Jade wants a song with.”

No-name girl? Who was this woman and who did she think she was? Tori didn’t show how offended she was. Besides, technically she wasn’t _wrong_. Tori Vega was, from the perspective of this woman clearly in charge of this management company, someone with no name.

The young Latina sat next to Jade after being invited to, and she stared at this woman who was giving her dirty looks and making grimaces of displeasure.

Jade was smiling, looking at Tori. “This is my new manager, Sophia Brigh. Sophia, this is Tori Vega.”

Sophia only made a little “hmph” to acknowledge she had understood what Jade said. Then she leaned back in her black leather chair.

“Vega… Vega… Are you related to Trina Vega, perhaps?”

Tori nodded quickly. “Yep. She’s my older sister.”

Sophia smiled, now looking much more interested. “I thought you too looked a little bit alike. I love her reality TV show and her YouTube channel. You’ve never been on either, have you?”

“I choose not to be. I prefer letting Trina do her things.”

Sophia nodded then looked at Jade.

“Jade, this is a big project and we have to do it right. You shouldn’t take chances and go with someone as boring as this girl. If you want an upcoming artist, I represent many that will bring better results. Or I have contacts that will find the perfect person.”

Tori didn’t come here to get insulted. But before she could defend herself, Jade spoke up.

“Don’t worry, I know you’ll make it work. Besides, see Tori as a blank canvas. You’ve always wanted to build an artist old-school style. Now’s your chance.”

“I like my artists to have substance, personality. They need to have a vibe when they enter a room. Your friend is quite boring to look at.”

Tori could see why Jade liked this woman. They both had brutal honesty in their personality in common, and Jade being the type of woman to enjoy people getting straight to the point, it certainly didn’t surprise Tori. Tori liked honesty, but the non-brutal kind.

“Maybe I should leave. If your manager thinks I’m not good enough, you should find someone else,” Tori said. Tears were starting to sting in her eyes. She was about to cry in front of a big agent, how pathetic.

But was this maybe why her career had never started? Was she boring, tasteless, uninteresting? Did she lack this “oomph” that made people memorable? What if what had made her interesting back in high school and college was the fact that her talent didn’t fit the image of normality she had? An average girl next door with amazing talent was special, but was it enough to make it big? Tori had always thought so.

“Stop being so mean to Tori,” Jade said, bringing coffee to her lips. “She can sing very well.”

“I am honest, Jade.” Sophia turned to look at Tori. Apparently, she saw how distraught Tori looked because she softened her approach. “Oh sweetie, I’m sorry. People say I’m too mean. You are truly beautiful, but you look like everyone else.”

Tori frowned, digging her nails into her thighs.

“What’s wrong with looking like everyone else?” She asked, thankful her voice had stayed steady.

“When you’re like everyone, you’re basically no one. Look at Jade. She’s honest, she’s fierce, she speaks her mind and that causes an aura to come out of her. When Jade enters a room, even if people don’t know her, they know not to fuck with her.”

And that was certainly true. Jade scared people not just by being terrifying, but by being confident in herself and what she could do. Tori would go as far as say the same about Trina. Trina was absolutely talentless and annoying in all the definitions of the word, but the blinding confidence Trina had in herself and what she could achieve was fascinating, and Trina had obviously found a path where egotistical and narcissistic people with little talent could succeed.

“But when I look at you,” Sophia continued, “something tells me you like to stay in your comfort zone. It’s cute, but it’s not interesting.”

Tori looked down, stunned. That honesty had certainly helped put things into perspective. Her mother was right; she needed a different life path.

“Sounds to me like you’re backing out of a challenge.” Jade was smirking, taking a gulp of her coffee again.

“Jade, always put your money where your mouth is. I have a reputation to preserve and frankly, I need spice in my life. Your friend has none.”

“I can sing! I’m talented!” Everyone had always said that. What was going on?

Tori hadn’t thought she would have an outburst, and it surprised Sophia, but only momentarily. The woman kept her cold composure, smiling.

“You think you’re the only talented singer on this planet? Please, we’re in Los Angeles, you’re a dime a dozen. If it was all it took to make it, most famous singers and rappers out there wouldn’t be flexing money on Instagram.”

Well, that settled it. The industry expert had looked at her case and said no. Tori would move back to her mom’s house and drag Beck with her if she had to, because apparently there was no way for her to make it.

“Come on, Sophia. Tori is pretty and talented. That’s two things you don’t have to fix,” Jade argued, frowning.

“Jade, it would take me months to build her into something. You need a single out in a few weeks. Do you see where I’m coming from?”

“It’s fine, Jade. Thanks for trying.” Tori was about to stand, but Jade gave her a look that sent a shiver down her spine. Tori felt tears in her eyes and if she had to stay here for one more minute, she’d cry.

_That’s why your sister made it and you didn’t. Look at you, not even putting up a fight._

Sophia hadn’t said that. That had come from inside Tori’s head. That naggy little voice that constantly told her she had failed.

“Listen to her songs. Tori, you have music, yeah?”

“But it’s not recent.”

“Whatever, give it.”

Jade was getting as annoyed as Tori was, so the young woman quickly gave Jade the website to stream the music. Tori watched as a celebrity and her manager listened to her music quietly, neither making a sound.

“It’s quite good,” Sophia said once the last song ended.

“See? What’s wrong with me doing a song with Tori?” Jade asked.

Sophia sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes. She didn’t have time to reply to Jade before the pop star added to her initial statement.

“Come on. Think about it. You have here the possibility of creating a new star. Don’t let it go to waste. Her boyfriend is an actor, her sister a social media superstar, how do you not see the opportunity—”

“Who’s your boyfriend?” Sophia interrupted Jade shamelessly.

“Beck Oliver. He played in that show, The King?”

Sophia shook her head. “I don’t know what that is. Must’ve been as boring as you.”

“Whatever, Sophia!” Jade’s voice got louder. “Make her interesting! Regardless, I’m doing a song with her, whether you want to or not!”

Sophia started typing on the keyboard of her computer, her fingers dancing rapidly, frantically, on the white keys.

“You are lucky I’ve been bored lately. Besides, I think there are a few things that are salvageable and I will hold any failure over Jade until our contract expires.”

Sophia turned the screen of her computer around and Tori read the first word of what she could see on the screen.

Contract.

That was a contract.

Jade’s agent was giving her a _contract_.

Holy fucking shit on Earth. After spending thirty minutes getting ripped apart and humiliated, Tori was getting signed by a big agent.

“I usually sign my artists for five years, but I’ll keep it short with you. I’m taking a chance here and I want to minimize my losses. Let’s start with six months, see how you improve.”

Contract.

“How are you going to build her as an artist in six months?” Jade asked.

“That’s not what I’m going to work on,” Sophia answered back.

Contract.

“Give her at least a year. Six months, that’s fast.”

Contract.

“Jade, I do things a certain way. You wanted me to take on this challenge, I’m doing it.”

 _Contract_.

“Where do I sign?” Tori said abruptly.

Sophia handed Tori a little pad to electronically sign the contract, and Tori did it fast, sloppily. She was shaking, barely registering anything other than this contract she was signing. Returning the black pad, Tori started wiping her tears. Soon it proved too much and she started sobbing. Pathetic. And Sophia shared that thought.

“Great, now she’s crying.” Tori’s new manager since ten seconds ago started rolling her eyes, finishing up the contract.

Jade gave Tori a box of tissues.

“I’m sending you a copy by email, once you give it to me. You’ll have time to read it, though you can’t change anything, since you already signed it,” Sophia chuckled.

Tori didn’t care. It was a bad idea and in hindsight, she should’ve read what Sophia had made her sign, but she didn’t care. She was signed. She was being given an opportunity. Another one.

“It goes without saying that you need new songs and they need to sound interesting. My PR girl, Jaylen, will call you to get you to assess you. Jade, you owe me a big one.”

Jade rolled her eyes and stood up.

“Which studio you want her to record to?” She asked.

“You decide. Just make sure the music is good. Leave through the backdoor, please. I’ve been warned that there are paparazzi around here.”

Jade helped Tori up, and they left the office. They first took a trip to the bathroom so Tori could freshen up. Jade leaned against a wall, waiting.

“I probably should’ve read the contract,” Tori said, only to lighten up the atmosphere.

“Don’t worry. Sophia isn’t a shady agent. She’s just a mean one.”

Tori washed her hands after wiping her face with a damp tissue. Bless the heavens for waterproof mascara.

“I’ll be honest with you; I can’t afford a big professional studio right now. Even André.” Tori spared Jade the details why.

Jade shrugged.

“It’s on me.”

Tori brusquely turned to look at Jade.

“Wait, really?”

“Yeah. I’m gonna have to help you out, or Sophia will not let me live this down.”

“Thanks for that, by the way. I mean, defending me and everything.”

“It was the only way to let me do this song with you. It was harder to get Sophia to represent me, trust me.”

Tori didn’t know Jade had sought out this manager, and not the other way around. She finished freshening up and she and Jade exited the building through the backdoor as requested. Again, Jade generously gave Tori a ride home.

“Why did it take you a month to contact me?” Tori asked, looking out the passenger window.

“I had to convince Sophia to see you. Then I got busy.” Jade turned and stopped at a red light.

“Busy?”

“Yeah. Believe it or not, I have things to do, even if it’s not music yet. And you will too, so get ready. Start freeing up your schedule, tell Beck and your family. You have no idea how long photo shoots can be. And when Jaylen finds out about Trina, you’re more or less going to have to acknowledge that.”

The weight of Tori’s actions started to come down. How would she tell Beck she was signed (for six months, but still) to an agent who seemed to see her more as a way to test her skills than anything else? What would her mother say?

“God, I don’t want to deal with Trina,” Tori whined.

Jade looked at her. “You see, Vega, that’s the thing.”

“What? I just don’t want to appear on Trina’s videos or her stupid show.”

“You don’t always get to do what you want to do. Get this through your head now. If Jay tells you to go somewhere or do something, you’re not at the level where you can say no and be picky.”

“If this Jay girl tells me to do a sex tape with Beck, I’ll have to? Jade, I’m not gonna deal with the female version of Mason.”

“Yeah, how did that go the last time, by the way?”

Well, Jade had gotten the opportunity to sing for the Platinum Music Awards instead of Tori. Then Jade became a famous singer while Tori didn’t. Now Jade was an A-lister worth close to a hundred million while Tori felt like she was a hundred million in debt. Maybe there was a lesson there.

“Sophia signed you for six months, mostly because she pitied you. Just to get her to meet you, it took me a month and a lot of boring jobs.”

Jade turned a corner.

“You have convictions, that’s all fine and dandy. But if you want this, if you really want this, I’m sorry but you’re gonna have to be open-minded and take risks. And going to a club and fight a gorilla is not going to be enough.”

Tori knew what Jade meant, even though she hated it.

“I don’t want to be fake, Jade. I can’t do music I don’t like, I can’t show half of my body to the world, I’m boring…”

Stopping the car in front of Tori’s apartment place, Jade looked at Tori.

“I don’t think you’re boring, Vega. I think you have a story to tell, but you’re not doing it.” Jade sighed. “I wonder why.”

Tori left the car, thanking Jade again and watching her drive away. The words stuck to her like glue and Tori was left contemplating what they meant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be sure to leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed it, and stay tuned for the next chapter!


	4. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A chapter a bit uneventful and shorter, but I wanted to set the stage for Tori and Beck's relationship and put down the stakes.
> 
> Please enjoy!

Tori stayed on the sidewalk as she watched Jade’s car drive off, still thinking about what Jade had meant. Jade thought Tori was hiding something, but there was nothing to hide. Tori was objectively not interesting, and contrary to most people around her, she didn’t have a story to tell. Tori was a girl from an upper middle-class home who happened to know how to sing, had gone to a performing arts school, college and was now trying to figure life out. How was this a story interesting enough to talk about? She lived with her boyfriend, they worked shitty jobs as they struggled to pursue their passions. That was depressing, not interesting. She didn’t want people to pity her, what good would it do to her career?

As she stood on the sidewalk, staring at a pile of garbage bags, she wondered if her life was maybe just a little bit interesting to talk about. The young woman sighed, hit in the face by what she thought was the truth. Truth was, it wasn’t. No one would be interested in her life if it was what she would tell. So, there was the truth; she wasn’t interesting and had nothing to tell. Sophia would have to work with her music, whether she liked it or not.

Tori entered her home, realizing it was quite early and that Beck wouldn’t be expecting her so early. In fact, he was still awake, sitting on their couch, watching television.

“Hey, you’re home early,” he commented, confused. “Didn’t you have work?

“Um, I did, yeah. But the boss told me to go home early…”

Tori put her bag down and sat down next to him, watching whatever he was watching. She wondered if after all these years together Beck could see when she was lying or not. She was a good actress, as much as he was a good actor, but after a decade together he had to have picked up on signals on when she was being dishonest.

To her surprise, Beck seemed completely unfazed by what she said. Instead, he replied with a quick, “That’s gonna hurt your paycheck.”

Now would be the perfect time to tell Beck she had gotten an agent and that Jade was going to do a song with her, but again, his reaction scared her. If he was against it, and she knew for certain he would be, what would she do? Maybe he liked their current living conditions, but she didn’t, and she wasn’t going to hide her feelings forever. Her mother’s words echoed in her mind every time Tori thought about an alternative. She didn’t want to keep going towards that direction. Her mom was right; at some point, Tori would want more out of life and it would involve upgrading their living conditions.

One thing was for sure, Tori loved Beck. Loved him more than anything. She wanted her life to be with him and no one else. It was what scared her the most, the idea of not being with him anymore, the idea that they would be forced to separate for having different values and life goals. If Beck could go on and on living paycheck to paycheck, going to an audition after another and dealing with all the rejection, he’d have to do it alone. Tori could see herself marrying him. She could see herself having a family with him. But she couldn’t picture herself living like this at forty.

“Hopefully he won’t make a habit out of it.” Beck smiled at her reassuringly.

He seemed in a good mood. He must’ve found an audition. If he was in such a good mood, maybe it was time for her to see what he thought about her mother’s offer: starting over, with something else. It was definitely Tori’s plan B. She had spent weeks thinking about it, even dodging her mother’s calls to come up with her own decision, but now she was ready. If whatever she was going to do with Jade or Sophia didn’t work, in six months, she was going back to the nest and finding a different college major or a job related to the arts. Surely with her education so focused on the entertainment industry, she had an advantage.

“Hey, babe, I wanted to ask you something…” Tori said quietly.

“Shoot.”

Tori played with her fingers nervously, staring at the floor.

“I wanted to know if you were happy.”

Beck froze. Tori saw a confused look for on his face and he paused his show, turning to give her his full attention.

“What do you mean? Of course, I’m happy.”

He looked so confused and it broke Tori’s heart. Worse yet, he looked and sounded genuine. He wasn’t sure what the angle of her question was, but something told Tori he was happy about everything. He was happy about his jobs, about their apartment, about him rushing to every audition he could find.

“Aren’t you happy?” He asked.

Like a deer in the middle of a road, Tori froze. It was now or never. Now was the time to face Beck with the truth Tori had hidden for so long. No, she wasn’t fucking happy. Yes, she hated everything about her current life and yes, she desperately wanted something else. Anything else.

“Not about everything,” she blurted out, waiting patiently for Beck to answer. Damn, he was gradually starting to look irritated. His eyes narrowed, and the rest of his body stiffened. His shoulders looked tense and the intense stare he was giving her made her wish she had never taken advantage of his mood to bring up the subject.

“What are the things making you unhappy?”

The way he asked her that felt condescending and insulting, as if she was a little girl making a big deal out of nothing, and he was simply playing along with whatever it was annoying her. And saying that this didn’t irritate Tori would be a massive lie. Not only did it irritate Tori, it made her lose her tact and patience. She was not going to have her sentiments thrown out of the window as if they were irrelevant or eccentric. They were valid and it was time for her to shove them down his throat.

“Exhibit A: our jobs.”

“What about them?”

Tori scoffed, managing to be surprised at the way he seemed to see nothing wrong with the way they were getting their paychecks. And perhaps some people had no issue with that. But she did, for many reasons.

“So, you like bartending or walking around a mall all night long?” She interrogated him.

He shrugged, giving her a condescending grimace. “It pays the bills, doesn’t it?”

Tori rolled her eyes as she asked, “I’m not asking if you’re making enough money, I’m asking if you like doing what you’re doing!”

“Of fucking course not! But that’s not a reason to be unhappy!”

“If that’s not a reason to be unhappy, how about our apartment? You like it?”

Beck looked around quickly. The place was small, not aesthetically pleasing or modern looking, but it was a home, wasn’t it? It was a roof over their heads they were paying together. Some people in Los Angeles worked three jobs and were still homeless. Tori was whining about trivial things.

“You wanted a pool, that’s why you’re pissed?”

“I don’t want to live like this forever! I hate being a waitress! I hate serving coffee in a stupid uniform!” Tori stood, almost screaming.

“Get a different job, then!”

“It’s not about the jobs, Beck! It’s not about having stupid luxuries either! I don’t want to live like this. I want to do a job I like, live in a house and raise…”

Tori sighed, not finishing her sentence. Instead, she settled for waiting for Beck to say anything. She wasn’t bringing in the conversation any more subjects that would make them argue or debate. When Tori saw that Beck was waiting for her to finish her sentence, she swiftly added something else.

“I mean, do you ever want to maybe go for a different career?” She added.

“Why? What’s wrong with the career I want to do?”

“It’s clearly not working!”

Beck laughed as he stood up.

“So, it’s better to just give up?” His face was turning into a grimace of anger, and Tori felt out of breath. “You’re done with singing and music so I should be done with acting?”

How dare he assumed anything about her? She hadn’t even mentioned singing and he thought she was done? Tori was already exhausted.

“No. I mean, put that project on hold and maybe go back to school or get a different job…”

“In other words, give up?” Beck looked down at Tori. “Things didn’t go your way, so you’re done?”

“Forget it.” No point in continuing and possibly disturbing their neighbours with their quarrel. He had made his point, she had to acknowledge it. But even if she chose not to pursue the conversation, she also realized that he couldn’t deny what she was saying or act like she had never said anything. And he couldn’t be surprised if, one day, she walked out.

God. Walk out. Just leave him and continue her life… Could that be possible? Let go of a ten-year-old relationship like that? God knew she didn’t want to. But would she have to?

“Your mom got into your head again, didn’t she?”

“Leave my mom out of this!”

Beck grabbed her by the shoulders tightly, his fingers digging into her flesh. He looked at her in the eye.

“Beck, you’re hurting me…” Tori murmured.

He ignored her and said, “I’m not giving up, and neither are you, got it?”

Tori’s hand slapped his arm away, surprising him as he loosened up his grip. She moved away from him, heading for the bedroom, closing the door behind her.

*******

As Tori locked herself up in their bedroom, Beck walked to the fridge and reached for a can of beer. Beck wasn’t much of a drinker, and neither was Tori. But they always had some beer in the fridge, which they drank sparingly.

Beck sat down on the couch, opening the can and taking a large gulp. He winced from the temporary brain freeze he felt and waited for it to dissipate. His heart sank as he stared at the Netflix homepage.

Tori wasn’t happy.

That revelation had left Beck speechless and kept him from dealing with their argument correctly. He felt a cold shiver run down his spine as her words echoed in his head. Finding out that his long-time girlfriend wasn’t happy with their living situation scared him. The moment they had gotten together, they had made communication vital in their relationship. It was important for both of them to constantly know where the other stood, how the other felt, something he had never experienced in any of his previous relationships. He loved that Tori confided in him, and that he could do the same. It was the first time they argued so hard with each other and it was their first argument based on life choices and life goals. A couple that couldn’t agree on such subjects was a couple that couldn’t go on. Beck knew that, and he wanted to avoid that.

Tori wasn’t happy.

Worse than that, she was tired. Beck had understood that quickly based on her questions, her arguments. She wasn’t just unhappy that they lived in shitty places and worked shitty jobs, she was unhappy that it was the case because neither could nor would change anything about it, especially when they had the means to. They were chasing dreams of success in their respective career choice, even if it wasn’t getting them anywhere. They were getting older, they both had dreams other than acting or singing, and time wasn’t waiting for them. People could go on and do things that made them unhappy. What they couldn’t do was do things that left them mentally drained. Tori had reached this point in her life.

What scared Beck more than that realization was the fact that he wasn’t tired of this life. Did he hate this apartment? Of course! His RV had been cleaner. Did he despise his jobs? Immeasurably. But he wasn’t tired, because he had faith that things would get better. He knew they wouldn’t be in that position forever. He didn’t expect wealth and fame, and he would be more than happy with a simple role and decent royalties. But Tori was tired. Tori wanted so much more, and she deserved so much more.

Beck loved Tori immensely. She was the partner every man wanted. They had been together for ten years, through good and bad. Beck could see himself marry her. He could see himself raise a family with her, grow old with her.

But he couldn’t give up, not now. As he took another large gulp of his beer, Beck wondered what he would do the day Tori decided she wanted to do something else. Would he let go of his dream for her? Would he follow her? Would he simply stand back and watch her move on to something else; something safer, comfortable?

Maybe that’s what scared him more, more than her being unhappy, more than him one day being tired. It was the fact that they were reaching this malevolent moment in every couple’s life, where they had to see if they were on the same page about everything, where they had the choice between sacrificing or compromising. Beck did not want to compromise; he didn’t want to sacrifice, and he did not want to lose Tori. Something told him Tori wouldn’t see things his way.

Finishing his beer, he threw the can in the recycling bin and headed for their bedroom. The least he could do was apologize and at the very least, promise that they’d find a solution.

Entering the room, he saw Tori sitting on their bed, holding her phone to her ear, head down. Her hair was covering her face so he could not see whether she was crying or not.

When his girlfriend heard the door open, she looked up.

“Hey, are you busy?” He whispered.

“Work…” Tori mouthed.

Beck walked to her and sat down next to her, waiting for the conversation to finish. He wasn’t sure what she was talking about to be frank and he couldn’t hear the words they were exchanging. Beck laid down, feeling a bit tired. He put his hand on Tori’s lap, and she took it off her.

“I need to deal with something, can we postpone our conversation?” There was a pause. “I know you’re busy, but… Oh, she did? Yes, I do but… Yes, I should have them by next month. How long do they usually take? Oh. Alright then. Yes, see you then, thank you.”

Tori hung up the phone, putting it on their nightstand. Then she turned to look at Beck. It didn’t look as though she had cried, though she seemed exhausted. Perhaps drained was a better word to use.

“What’s up?” She asked, before he could ask how the conversation went.

“I … I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have hurt you.”

Tori shrugged, crossing her legs.

“It’s fine, it wasn’t on purpose.”

The way she was avoiding looking at him bothered Beck, but he dismissed that. He reached for her hand, took it, and was pleased when she squeezed it. Then she laid down next to him, inching closer, but still avoiding looking at him. How frustrating.

“I heard you, by the way. I understand what you mean.”

Ah, did he? Oh, but did she care?

Tori looked confused yet hopeful, and she finally made eye contact with him.

“You do?”

Beck nodded. “I guess I haven’t been living in reality and it hurt you. Us. I don’t have a solution right now, but I promise you we’ll work on something.”

Tori smiled, wrapping one arm around him.

“Thank you.”

Beck put a kiss on her temple, and they laid in bed until Tori excused herself to the kitchen, claiming to be thirsty.

Beck watched her leave and looked at the white ceiling of their bedroom, sighing in frustration. Beck wasn’t ready. He wasn’t sure he would truly let go of his dream and settle for easy. Easy was boring. A normal life like Tori was slowly getting to accept was boring. He couldn’t do that. Work a regular job, even if related to acting, get a paycheck every two weeks, raise a few children and do this until he retired, just to fall into a different routine? No. He couldn’t. That would drive him mad. Beck didn’t like easy, he didn’t like boring, he didn’t like predictable. He liked the excitement of learning lines, of having irregular set hours, of fighting the odds. That’s what he liked, that’s what he wanted. That’s why he had pursued acting as soon as possible, why he had fought his parents to attend Hollywood Arts, majored in acting and why he wasn’t talking to them. They wouldn’t approve of him wasting his years away and he couldn’t risk letting them get to his head, or Tori’s.

Tori. He loved her; he knew that. She was his everything. And his everything was ready to walk out on him, and that was unacceptable. But as unacceptable it was for her to leave him, it was unacceptable for him to let go of his dream and settle.

Beck sat up. There had to be an alternative, something that was neither compromising nor sacrificing. Something he could do to tip the scales in his favour. Beck scoffed. He was hopeful but still unrealistic. To tip the scales, even a little, he would need a lot of luck. Some people had contacts, some people got lucky and some people did things they never would’ve done if they weren’t desperate.

Beck didn’t want to think about being desperate, but all of this was bringing him closer to the edge. He couldn’t keep failing auditions. He would have to work harder, find more auditions, more projects, meet more people. A timer had been set; the time he had left before Tori gave him an ultimatum (because she would). He just didn’t know when his time would run out. He feared the day he would cross over, because then there was no going back.


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! It's been a while, I know, I know. It all started when I finally sent my laptop to get repaired. At least now I don't need to use an external keyboard to type, yay. Then I got distracted, no lie. 
> 
> I do have good news, though. The next two chapters are already written. They just need editing and correcting.
> 
> So enjoy this chapter.

It was the first time Tori met Jaylene face-to-face. She had briefly spoken to her on the phone, just a month ago, though the conversation had ended because of Beck. On the phone, Jaylene had sounded sweet, like an angel. She had also been very understanding of Tori’s reservations, about what she was or wasn’t willing to do. Jaylene had asked several questions about Tori’s life, her past and her present, what she hoped for the future. Tori had unfortunately given very boring and generic answers, stuff Jaylene would never be able to use, and the aspiring singer was more than aware of that. She didn’t want to seem money-oriented, or hungry for fame, and her past was boring, honestly.

Tori hoped whatever she had told Jaylene had provided a minimum of the information needed to make a basic biography. Truthfully, Tori was more than happy with being described as an average girl with a passion for singing and performing. There was nothing wrong with that either, was there? Well, Tori certainly hoped so.

The aspiring artist refocused her attention on her publicist. Jaylene was a tall dark skin Black woman who looked elegant yet friendly. Tori briefly wondered if Jaylene always dressed like that or if today was special. She wore a white long-sleeved dress with a lot of gold accessories. Her dreadlocks were in a neat bun and Tori saw that her makeup used various shades of gold, while still retaining a natural look. Plus, she smelled so good. As Tori sat at her desk, she caught a whiff of something smelling sweet and soft. This elegant, proud and mesmerizing woman was the head of PR and the main publicist of Managold Management. Tori’s publicist. The brunette never felt more out of place in her life. She was in the big leagues and it showed. It showed in the confidence Jaylene had, it showed in the way Sophia said whatever she wanted to say without fearing the consequences.

“I’m so happy to see you. I’m Jaylene Regina. I’ll be your publicist,” Jaylene said. Even the way she introduced herself was elegant. Reincarnation was real because Jaylene had to be the reincarnation of a queen.

“I’m Tori Vega, hi!” Tori nervously said. Did she have to dress a certain way to meet her manager or her publicist? They always dressed so professionally. Yet last week, Jade had been in a shirt and jeans. Tori herself was wearing a simple t-shirt and a pair of jeans today. She felt so underdressed.

“I know. Soph signed you for six months apparently.”

Tori nervously nodded. “Yep, she did.”

That made Jaylene laugh.

“That woman is too much.”

Tori wouldn’t call Sophia Brigh too much. She would call her the devil’s bestie, maybe the devil itself. Sophia had ordered the company’s secretary to give her a box of tissues, clearly not over Tori crying in her office last month. Who did this?

Jaylene was typing on her computer. She still looked at Tori with a smirk.

“Word of advice?” She started, typing with the same speed. “Don’t let her get to you. Show her you’re strong and she’ll make less fun of you.”

Tori was so surprised by that she barely registered it at first. What did that mean? Why did she have to show Sophia she was strong to be treated well? Sophia was her manager, she should be respecting her, not humiliating her or belittling her every chance she got! Did that mean Tori would either have to toughen up or get bullied for the next six months?

Wow, bullied by her own manager. Maybe she shouldn’t have signed that contract, maybe it would’ve been better to agree with Sophia and deal with Jade’s anger afterwards.

That was still useful advice for sure and Tori thanked Jaylene for it.

“Soph told me to start putting you in the public eye. I came up with a few things we could do and don’t worry, I know there are things you don’t want to do so we’re not going to do them.”

Oh, that sounded promising! Tori sat at the edge of her seat excitedly. She didn’t know what Jaylene had in mind, but she was looking forward to it. She couldn’t wait for the interviews, the photo shoots, the tours and meet and greets. Oh yes, Tori could picture it and she was hungry for it.

“Soph contacted Trina’s manager to see if Trina could let you appear on her YouTube channel while the producers of her show decide whether or not they’re renewing it for another season. In the meantime, I’m thinking of revamping your social media and—”

“I don’t want to appear on Trina’s channel.”

Jay looked confused, and perhaps even lost. Tori had cut her in the middle of what had started to feel like a waterfall of information. When Jaylene was in the zone, getting out of it before she was finished always left her confused. The publicist blinked a few times before she pulled out a file from a drawer in her desk and pulled out a white piece of paper.

“Last month, when we spoke on the phone, you said you wanted nothing that involved drama, sex or anything over the top. Now, I know Trina’s reputation and I promise you we can negotiate something modest for you. The goal is just to get people to know you and get interested in you.”

“No, that’s not the point. I don’t want to be on Trina’s show or be anywhere near Trina.”

Jay frowned and stared at Tori.

“Why not?” She grabbed a pen, which was gold and white. Now that Tori thought about it, everything in her office was gold and white, from the stationery to the design to even the computer.

“Do you have a family feud? Is there something I need to know? Tori, I need some transparency from you. I’m trying to help you the best I can within the timeframe I have.”

Jay was so sweet and it broke Tori’s heart to act so uncooperative. But Tori hadn’t spoken to Trina in years, at first out of embarrassment and worry that associating with her would hurt her own career. Tori was pretty sure Trina had not even noticed or, if she had, cared.

Like a complete child, Tori just shrugged. “I just don’t want to.”

Jay shook her head. “Now, sweetie, that’s not a reason. If you’re scared that Trina’s problematic reputation might harm yours, trust me, I will make sure people see the difference between you both.”

It wouldn’t be hard. It would even be preferable.

“That’s not just that.”

Jay waited for an answer, before writing something down in cursive.

“You’re not jealous of Trina, are you?”

“What? No!”

Tori stared at Jay in bewilderment, feeling her heartbeat ten times as fast as usual. It was pounding in her chest as she suddenly felt nervous. Why was Jay assuming Tori was jealous of Trina? Why would Tori be jealous of Trina? Trina had built a career from, at first, over the top videos, full of the weirdest stories no one with any self-respect would put out there for the world to know. Then, her behaviour had warranted the attention of people, and Trina had done everything to push the conversation even further. There were days where Tori wondered if she would recognize her older sister underneath all that plastic surgery.

Unperturbed, Jaylene pulled out a little notebook (which was white and gold) and opened it. After flipping through it a little, she looked over whatever she had scribbled in black ink.

“I did some research about you. You went to the performing arts school Hollywood Arts, yes?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. People there said that you were quite talented and beautiful while Trina was, and I quote from a teacher, ‘So irritating she was blacklisted from many classes.’”

That was news for Tori. She had never known Trina had been forbidden from taking some of the classes due to the fact that she was that annoying. Yes, students (and teachers) didn’t like her, but to the point of keeping her from attending certain classes? Wow.

“When questioned about Trina’s success, many mentioned that they were surprised that she had managed to earn fame while you didn’t.” Jaylene closed her notebook. “My fear is that you are, in a way, jealous of Trina’s success and feel reluctant at the idea of going to her to jump-start your own career. Maybe you’re a little bit prideful…”

Tori looked down at the floor, quiet. A ball had formed in her stomach, heavy and gigantic. Like an open book, Jay had read her. Tori should be defending herself, tell that woman that she was wrong, and that Tori wasn’t petty or childish enough to envy whatever Trina had. But that wasn’t true. The truth was that Jaylene was right and that Tori was lying to herself. Yes, Tori hated that Trina had managed to carve a path to fame when she was so incredibly untalented and irritating. Tori hated the possibility that Trina overshadowed her, when Tori had once been the one to cast a shadow on her older sister. Christ, this was unfair.

Seeing Tori so silent, Jay sighed. The black woman had desperately hoped she was just guessing and not telling the truth, throwing a few metaphorical jabs at Tori so she could understand what was at stake here. The silence, the resignation, they both told Jay her first assessment of Tori had been right. On the phone, Tori had refused to open up, not because of timidity, but because she was lying to herself. And these lies would kill her in the future if she didn’t get a grip on reality.

“When you come into my office, leave your pride at the door,” Jay said softly. “It won’t help either of us.”

Tori nodded.

“So, do you still want to avoid Trina?”

Tori looked up at Jay, eyes watery, tears nearly blinding her. She shrugged.

“Do what you think is best.”

Jay smiled and promised Tori an answer as soon as she got one. Jay decided to end their meeting there on that breakthrough, opening the calendar app on her computer to see when they could have another meeting.

The secretary entered the room, holding an iPad. He glanced at it quickly before looking at Tori.

“Hi, Jay. Are you guys done?” He asked.

“We’re finishing. Why?”

“Because Sophia would like to see Tori right now.”

“I didn’t know Tori had a meeting with Sophia today.” Jay said, legs crossed under her desk.

The young man glanced at his iPad again.

The secretary shrugged. “Sophia has a busy afternoon and she said she wanted to get everything unimportant over with right now.”

Tori noticed that Jaylene seemed annoyed at how the office’s secretary had worded his sentence. The raven-haired man noticed it too because he quickly blurted out:

“Her words, not mine. I swear.”

Jay tightened her grip on her pen.

“Not surprising,” she whispered. “Tori, I’ll text you the details later. Go with Josh.”

Tori grabbed her bag from the carpeted floor and thanked Jaylene for her time. She followed “Josh” as he quickly walked to the elevator on the other side of the floor. Jaylene’s office was at the end of the second-to-last floor of the office. On her floor, there were other smaller offices and a large waiting area. Today, aside from one man in his own office, there was no one else but Jaylene on this floor. Would Tori ever meet the other employees of Managold Management? Was it necessary?

Entering the elevator, Josh pressed the button to go to the last floor. Sophia’s office.

“I have to get back to work. Have a nice day.”

*******

Tori entered Sophia’s office carefully. This impromptu meeting stressed her. She had already been read today; she didn’t need another therapy session. And with how harsher Sophia was, Tori knew she’d leave the office in tears again.

Sophia was looking at her computer, eating something that smelled very strong. As Tori took a seat in front of her, she noticed that Sophia was eating potato salad. While this information was useless, it also calmed down the brunette. There was something humanizing about that. Sophia ate food like most humans on this planet. She wasn’t a supernatural creature, that was good.

It was then that Tori realized Sophia scared her, because she was finding comfort in a bowl of potato salad. Christ.

“You wanted to see me?” She said.

Sophia took a large bite of her lunch. After chewing and swallowing, without ever looking at Tori, she said:

“I was told you had recorded the songs.”

And missed several days of work to do so, and spent many hours cooped up in a studio. If Sophia wasn’t grateful for all the sacrifices Tori was doing, she would get angry. She wouldn’t show that anger, but she would complain at home.

“I did. I have them with me.”

Tori reached inside her bag for the flash drive her songs were in, and Sophia extended her hand to take the little device. She inserted it in her computer and turned on the speakers. It took a few seconds before the first song started to play. Tori loved these songs. She was proud of them. They had been eating dust in a notebook for years and now they had actual studio production. Even the producers had praised them and promised Tori they were radio hits. Surely Sophia would too, if she had any taste.

Sophia listened to the songs quietly. She had the strange ability of staying still and quiet. Her brown eyes would focus on one thing and Tori even noticed she would take longer to blink.

Once the last song ended, Sophia leaned back into her chair.

“You can sing. Jade didn’t lie to me about that,” Sophia commented.

“Um, yeah. Thank you. What did you think of the songs?”

There was silence. Sophia started eating again.

“Record new songs, I want them by next month.”

Tori frowned.

“What? What’s wrong with these songs?” She exclaimed.

“Nothing. They’re excellent. A few of them could even top the charts.”

Sophia was eating her lunch with renewed energy, but her attitude was cold and uncaring. Poor potatoes stuck in the stomach of such a vicious woman.

Sophia added: “But they’re not quite the right thing. They sound fake to me.”

Now Tori was just confused. The songs were excellent, Sophia had called them chart toppers, but they weren’t good? How did that make sense?

Sophia stared at the brunette sitting in front of her as she ate, her red lipstick not smearing. Tori looked stunned, her lower lip quivered, and she looked ready to argue. To Sophia’s contained surprise, Tori weakly nodded, stood up and promised six new songs by next month. She even apologized for wasting the manager’s time and she made her way to the elevator. Sophia watched her newest client leave emotionlessly. Then, when the elevator door closed, she closed the lid of her recipient and put it on the corner of her desk. She pinched the bridge of her nose, shocked and disgusted. Tori Vega hadn’t even put up a fight. She had simply decided that her manager was right and that she had to work on new songs. For the first time in her very long career, Sophia felt helpless.

*******

Tori wondered how Sophia could decide that her songs were bad by listening once. Well, the woman hadn’t said they were bad, she had said they were fake. What did it mean?

Whatever now. She still had to return to the studio. That meant missing more hours at work and lying to Beck even more. She couldn’t do that; she couldn’t keep up. Eventually, he would notice something was wrong, that things were not adding up. She couldn’t keep hiding everything that was going on. He’d never forgive her.

Exiting the office through the backdoor as she was obligated to, Tori called Jade. Jade had insisted on talking with her after the meeting with Jay, and now the impromptu one with Sophia. Until Sophia approved of Tori’s music, Jade was grounded and incapable of moving forward with her own career.

As if Tori needed more stress in her life. She now had five months to look interesting to Sophia and even less time to do her duet with Jade. Neither had even started to work on their song, and Tori was disappointed to give Jade more negative news.

“Hi, superstar,” Jade said once she answered the phone. “How did it go?”

“Superstar” was Tori’s nickname. Tori wasn’t sure if it was meant to be endearing or insulting, but she liked it. It felt personal, intimate. It was better than be called stupid by her old high school bully.

“You were right; Jay is super sweet,” Tori answered.

“And she’s amazing. She knows everyone. She’ll get you on TV before you know it.”

“I also met Sophia today.”

“Really? Did she listen to your songs, what did she say?”

“She said they were excellent and chart toppers.”

Jade chuckled on the other side of the phone. “Great.”

“But she still wants me to do six new songs by next month.”

Another check of five thousand dollars Jade would have to sign. More hours of work Tori would have to miss to make it happen and since she didn’t have songs or lyrics ready, it meant more time to work on them before even getting behind the studio microphone. And she had thirty days.

Jade said nothing, though Tori heard rustling through the phone.

“What else did she say?”

“She said they sounded fake to her.”

Jade made a sound of exasperation through the phone just as Tori got into her Uber.

“Now Sophia is playing mind games with us. Great.”

Tori didn’t share this feeling one hundred percent. Were they mind games or Sophia trying to get her point across? Something Tori had understood really quickly was that Sophia and anyone working with her was very smart and strategic. Sophia had represented the biggest stars or built them up to become said stars. The woman knew what she was doing, and she knew she didn’t have much time. So why was she fucking with Tori?

“I’m sorry, Jade. I wish it was easier.”

“It wouldn’t be fun if it was the case.”

“But what about your music?”

Jade laughed. “Don’t worry about that, it’s fine. I have some time, though Sophia keeps sending me other artists’ portfolios.”

What a bitch. A bitch that Tori was signed to. A bitch who was controlling her. Great.

“I’m guessing you need the bank of Jade West to give you another generous loan?”

That made Tori groan. “I don’t mean to take your money, trust me. I thought these songs were the good ones.”

“Believe me, five thousand dollars a week really doesn’t break the bank.”

There it was. Jealousy, envy, anger. Tori wasn’t doing music for the money, otherwise she would’ve done whatever it was Trina had done to get to where she was today, but hearing Jade brag about giving, not loaning, but giving her five thousand dollars just stabbed Tori in the heart.

“Are studios really that expensive?” Tori asked.

“Some of them are. Sophia’s favourite ones especially. I gave you the affordable studio.”

That was affordable? For whom?

“If you want to come by my house for a brainstorming session feel free.”

That sounded like it could be potentially fun or potentially dangerous. Tori would’ve said yes, but she remembered Beck was waiting for her at home and that she had a shift at the restaurant later today. Plus, her mother was frantically texting her. She refused but promised Jade to come by another time once her schedule was free.

When Tori entered her home, she saw Beck sitting on the couch, as if waiting for her.

“Hey, babe, how was the audition?”

In theory, Tori should never ask Beck a question like that one. It just made him angry. However, she wanted the attention off of her. If he was focused on his anger or his disappointment, she was buying herself time.

To her surprise, Beck shrugged.

“I didn’t get the part. But you got something, didn’t you?”

Beck didn’t seem angry as he stood up from the couch and walked towards her. Tori put her bag down and took her shoes off.

“I do?”

“Yeah. Trina tweeted today, and I quote, ‘lmao omg guys, my sister got a manager today’.”

Tori blushed, looking at the floor.

“Oh, right I did.”

Beck hugged her, laughing. “Why didn’t you tell me you were looking for an agent?”

“I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.” Tori shrugged, lying through her teeth. “We have more important things to deal with.”

“Babe, that’s great news, and they’re a big deal.”

Tori laughed. That was the minimum Beck needed to know to make her life easier. Would she mention who she was signed to and what the main objective was? Of course not. He didn’t need to know that. Unless he asked.

“Now my manager wants me to record six songs for her. She’s covering the studio fees.”

“You have a ton of songs you’ve been working on. That’s great. You’ll be singing on stage before you know it.”

Tori wished she could tell him the truth, but seeing him so happy, after months of unhappiness… She couldn’t do that to him.

Especially not when he leaned closer, kissing her deeply, one hand on her ass and fondling it through the fabric.

Hello, someone was in a very good mood. And as much as she wanted to share that mood with him, time was working against them.

“Beck,” Tori managed to murmur between their kiss. “I have to get ready for work this afternoon.”

“It won’t take long,” Beck whispered back, his free hand cupping her face as he cornered her.

“Seriously, I have to get ready and my mom wants to talk with me. You have a shift too, I believe.”

Beck let her go, shrugging in defeat.

“Alright, alright. You win. But I’m not forgetting our plans. You’re not gonna get any rest on your day off, trust me.”

Tori watched him leave the living room for the kitchen and she sat down on the couch. He had taken the news well and that comforted her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be sure to leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed it, and stay tuned for the next chapter!


	6. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short Beck-centered chapter witth a quick smut-scene in the middle. Time to focus a bit more on our actor.
> 
> For people who want to skip NSFW scenes, I'm putting them between bold brackets like these: [[...]].
> 
> Happy reading!

_Jade left the stage in her stupidly uncomfortable outfit and went backstage to her lodge. She greeted and thanked people for their compliments on the way there. But as much as she felt pride in her hard work, she wasn’t as mesmerized or excited. Her performance had gone as expected: perfectly. And the crowd had lapped it all up. As expected. To Jade, this was just the beginning, and she didn’t want to let her emotions get the best of her when there was still so much work to do, and so much to achieve._

_Jade sat in her lodge, where her new manager was waiting. Mason Thornesmith adorned a malicious smirk as he clapped for her. Jade was in no way intimidated._

_“Good job, superstar! Rest up and enjoy the rest of the show. Tomorrow, we have a lot of work to do. Trust me, you’re gonna have a long and interesting career.”_

_Jade would strangle him if it didn’t happen. She watched him leave before going to the clothing rack to grab her next costume._

_As she got ready to change into another long and uncomfortable dress to watch the rest of the program with her friends, Jade saw someone in the corner of her eyes, by the door of her lodge. Security was bad here if any random person managed to get near her lodge._

_“Who’s there?” She asked, thankful she hadn’t undressed yet._

_Beck emerged from the shadows as he entered her lodge, one hand in his pockets. The other hand was holding a can of lemonade. He gave her a little wave using the hand holding the can of lemonade._

_“Hey. Congratulations. You were great,” he said._

_Shrugging, Jade refocused her attention on her mirror. She wanted this pink atrocity off of her body, along with the atrocious hair. She had another pink atrocity to wear and the hair stylist was supposed to come by to do another atrocious haircut on her. She would have to convince Mason in the future to let her choose the atrocities to wear._

_“Thanks. Lots of rehearsals went behind it.”_

_Beck smiled, then started chuckling. He looked at the floor, kicked his leg back and forth, then looked at her again._

_“I need to ask you something,” he said quietly._

_“The answer is no.”_

_He chuckled again. Jade recognized that chuckle, had heard it so much when they used to date. Whenever he was angry, it was that fucking chuckle she’d hear the most. This was not a happy chuckle; he had something else in mind._

_“No. That’s not what I was going to ask. How do you sleep at night?”_

_Jade shrugged again, confused. “I lay my head down on my pillow, close my eyes and—”_

_The lemonade can shattered her mirror the moment it hit it, just above her head, and Jade had to take a step back and cover her face to avoid getting shards of glass in the face. Shocked, she turned to look at Beck. He looked pissed._

_“Do not play stupid with me!” He warned, voice guttural. “You know exactly what I meant!”_

_Jade reached behind her for a pair of scissors and she tightly grabbed them. Jade wasn’t sure what Beck was capable of when he was this angry, since she had never witnessed anything other than vocal outbursts, but she was ready to fight him in case he tried anything. She looked at him in the eye._

_“I know what you meant. And you got my answer. I sleep really fucking well at night and I’m going to sleep even better tonight.”_

_Beck took a step closer. “You heartless bitch! This should’ve been Tori’s chance, not yours.”_

_“Tori had the chance and she turned it down. Now it’s my chance and I fucking took it. Tori just got a taste of what it feels like to be pushed aside.”_

_Beck glared her with all his might, and as he walked towards her, hands forming fists, Jade got ready to stab him with her scissors._

_“You were never pushed.” Beck’s voice sounded confused. “You’ve always been so jealous of Tori, why?”_

_“I wasn’t jealous of her. I was angry. You wouldn’t know what it feels like, you’re used to getting all the attention all the time too.”_

_“Best thing I’ve ever done was breaking up with you!”_

_Jade sighed and chose not to fall for the bait. She didn’t have time to argue with him, not anymore. She would simply settle for calling security and have Beck leave._

_Still, the opportunity to insult him was too good to pass up._

_“Now that you’re a happy single man, you can go see that little bitch Tori and make babies with her. Get out of my face, I’m the star now, not Tori.”_

_When Beck swung his fist at her, Jade quickly moved away, using the scissors to stab him. While they didn’t go through his hand as she had expected, they made a pretty long open wound near his wrist, and the pain made Beck step back._

_The teenagers both stared at each other in shock, at both the situation and their own actions. Jade was speechless; Beck had actually tried to punch her. He had tried to physically harm her and she had retaliated by wounding him with the intention of doing a lot worse. Jade was stunned only for a moment, before she screamed for security, her hand gripping the bloody scissors. Two bulky men entered her lodge. They escorted Beck outside, removing his visitor’s pass and forbidding him from entering the premises again._

*******

Beck still wasn’t used to auditioning, even though it was his life and his routine. He was so used to things going his way, even if it involved struggling for a little while. He was used to being or feeling like this rare pearl, the answer to the casting director’s needs. It was what had gotten him on the theatre stage, what had gotten him on TV. In college, he had been the handsome guy, the talented actor, the laid-back student who took things as they came but delivered everything with passion. He had stood out in high school; he had stood out in college and it had served him. Beck had never truly experienced auditioning until his show got cancelled, and he realized that his resume and his ability to stand in a restrained environment wasn’t enough.

Sitting on one of these small, uncomfortable chairs, the aspiring actor looked around himself. From what he could see, there were a dozen guys here, and it was just the morning audition hours. He felt positively average. Everyone here looked like a model, ten times more confident than him, more muscular, taller, more interesting, just more charisma. Beck felt like he wasn’t enough. He just wasn’t enough. And all these aspiring actors, or maybe they were influencers, or maybe they had other goals, they all just wanted this little role as a supporting actor on this Netflix series.

“Beck Oliver?”

Beck looked up at the young woman who said his name, and raised his hand, standing.

“It’s me.”

“They’re waiting for you inside.”

Beck entered the room the woman designed for him. He was facing a panel of four people, all looking at him. A man explained the procedure Beck knew all too well, what scene they would do and the vibe they wanted. Once told, Beck brought up his A-game. He had learned the lines, had added a little bit of himself in them and he let it show in his acting. He was almost annoyed that the man reading the script to him sounded dead and bored; Beck was doing it all, the man was reading like he was reading a fast food menu.

At the end, the man put away the script. Him and his colleagues wrote down a few things and he looked back at Beck.

“Thank you, we’ll call you.”

Beck thanked them and left the office, hands in his pockets. He made sure to look confident as he walked by the other aspiring actors, but inside, he clearly didn’t get the role. They wouldn’t call him; he hadn’t done what they needed him to do. He wasn’t what they wanted.

Walking back to his car, Beck started thinking about doing what Tori had done, find a manager, someone to help her. He wasn’t sure it was what he wanted. He preferred the freedom of being independent, of finding himself the auditions he wanted and not having someone tell him what to do, where to go.

Beck took comfort in the fact that Tori was having better chance than he was. She was a little bit vague about who was her manager, how she had found them and what they had planned. He regretted not asking more questions when he first learned about it, and even though he was curious, he didn’t want to risk it. Tori was signed, which meant she was still focusing on her career, which meant the chances that she’d give him an ultimatum were low. And he was more than happy with that. The only downside was that she was taking fewer shifts at work to be able to do what her manager wanted her to do, whether it was meeting them or making her spend hours at the studio for songs. From what Beck knew, that manager was very critical and harsh. But if it kept Tori in LA, Beck was happy. He didn’t mind taking more shifts at either of his jobs to cover for the paychecks Tori was losing.

Beck got home and skipped eating or showering. He directly took his clothes off and jumped into bed. He always tried to get the early morning auditions, even if it meant driving from work to wherever the audition was. Was it good for his health? Of course not! Christ, it was awful. But there were fewer people in the morning and the minds of the casting people were fresh. He thought it gave him a little advantage. Besides, he was lucky to live on a quiet street, and his girlfriend was usually gone, so he could still catch several hours of sleep.

When his head hit the pillow, he was out cold until late afternoon.

*******

When Beck wasn’t getting sleep deprived as a security guard, he was serving entitled people who didn’t know how to tip correctly, and the lack of sleep made him irritable and rude, which made some patrons complain on very bad nights. Beck never thought he would be a bartender out of college, wanting tips not just to have money in his pocket, but to keep a roof over his head and maybe, pay back some student loans. But it was the best job he could get at the moment.

Even though many customers were cheap by LA standards, the tips he made in two weeks were enough to cover a large part of the rent, sometimes its entirety when he was lucky, so he wasn’t complaining. Plus, he was working in a bar where a lot of industry people regularly hung out, though that number was growing smaller and smaller as time went by. He would often recognize an artist or a singer, and they would tip him without thinking about what they were giving him. He always made sure to remember the ones who wouldn’t tip, and they were usually the rich and obnoxious influencer who was known just for having successful plastic surgery and some drama in their life.

Like Tori’s sister, Trina. He chuckled at the thought of one day seeing her here. The bar was growing in popularity within these new nouveau riche young adults, and with that popularity came with new customers hunting selfies or trying to befriend said influencers.

There were nights where he would get recognized but it was usually rare and the interaction often went nowhere. He truly preferred serving drinks to walking around a mall at night, struggling to stay awake and getting creeped out by the silence and the mannequins.

Beck put away a glass he was cleaning when two young women sat down at the bar. One of them, a young brunette in a blue dress, leaned closer then gasped.

“Oh my God, I knew it was you!” She said, before turning to look at her friend. “I told you it was him!”

Her friend, a smaller and curvier blonde, squinted then gasped. “Oh wow, you are right. It is him.”

Beck smiled, confused at first, until he realized the girls probably referred to his role in the series The King. He was aware of the small cult following he had composed of teenagers and young women. Such encounters were very rare, and he was happy about it. It would suck to be surrounded by young girls every time he went outside.

“What can I serve you, ladies?” He asked with a smile. “We have a discount for girls with pretty eyes.”

Beck hated this type of ass licking, but many customers were better tippers when he stroked their egos. And with these two, especially since they’d recognized him, it worked like a charm. The brunette ordered two appletinis, which he would have to cover with a part of his tips, but it was worth it. If it meant them getting wasted and him getting that investment back, so be it.

He had expected them to take their drinks and leave, but to his surprise, the brunette stayed at the bar while her friend left to go annoy some Instagram comedian being obnoxious in a private booth.

“You were so cute on that show,” she started.

“Thanks.” Beck served the two drinks. “You’re not too bad yourself.”

He gave the girl a wink, and she giggled.

“Thanks so much. I’m Melanie, by the way.”

“You obviously know my name,” Beck joked, which earned him another giggle from the girl.

Bringing the drink to her lips, she took a little sip. She really was cute; her brown eyes shone with happiness, she had the prettiest smile and her wavy hair smelled good.

“I remember how my friend and I had watch parties,” she mentioned. “Every Thursday, we’d all go up to my room and just watch your show. You were amazing.”

“Thanks. It was really fun to do.”

“What are you doing now?” She asked, suddenly realizing someone she had seen on her TV screen was serving drinks at a bar.

“Taking a break, thinking about my next move,” Beck said, hoping he was humble and hiding the truth. He doubted his fan wanted to hear him talk about the struggles of being broke in LA.

The girl nodded then said, “I’m so pissed they never renewed the show for another season. I always tell my dad: ’daddy, you have to pick up the show!’ but he never liked it. What a shame, you’re such a good actor.”

“Thanks. What does your dad do for a living? He’s a screenwriter?”

The girl laughed, rolling her eyes.

“As if daddy could write. No, he owns a production company. They make shows. Nothing good or ground-breaking so far.”

“I see. So, you’re an industry expert?”

“Something like that. Daddy wants me to start using my talents to find the next gem but how am I supposed to do that if he doesn’t trust me?”

Beck served her another appletini. Maybe she was lying to get free drinks out of him, but he was rarely getting that number of compliments or just attention. He needed an ego boost from time to time, and as much as he liked Tori’s support, the boost felt more meaningful coming from a complete stranger.

“I trust you. I know one day you’ll produce an Emmy-winning show,” he said.

Assuring her the drink was on him, Beck quickly served a man, who left as soon as he got his drink. Melanie looked at the wooden bar shyly.

“That’s actually a dream I have,” she whispered, leaning closer so he would be the only person to hear.

“Really?”

“Yeah. As much as I like sappy shows, I’m sick of them. It’s hard to find something interesting on television. I want to produce a show people wait for impatiently, because it’s genuinely good, with real good actors.”

Beck didn’t think Melanie had that much ambition. He had assumed she was just a spoiled daddy’s girl wanting a simple life by dating the first celebrity that came her way. But no. The look in her eye told him she was a woman with objectives, and he found that respectable.

“I trust you’ll do it. And hey, if you need an actor, I’ll happily help out.”

“Really?”

“Yep. I can play a very good bartender.”

She laughed, assuring him he’d be considered for the role.

“Aside from drinks and acting, what else can you do?” She asked, fingertip running against the rim of her drink.

Oh, now she was flirting with him. Her posture had changed, she was leaning so he could see her cleavage, she pushed her hair back and smiled at him. And frankly, Beck felt like flirting back. Anything for a tip, right?

“I’d tell you to stay so you could find out, but a girl like you might not be interested in a boring guy like me.”

“What if I told you you were my type and a lot more interesting than most guys out there?”

“I’d tell you my shift ends in a few minutes.”

Beck never meant for that to go anywhere further, but the girl was into it. She smiled at him.

“I’ll wait, and I’ll give you all my industry secrets.”

*******

**[[** Would it be incredibly macho for Beck to admit he had been feeling a little bit sex-deprived lately? After thinking quickly, he realized that, yes, it would. It would be macho and maybe borderline misogynistic. After all, sex was not necessary in a relationship and he wasn’t owed sex in any way. Beck always respected his girlfriend when she refused his advances, and Tori did the same. They had healthy boundaries, healthy communication and trust. Besides, Beck wasn’t the kind of person who needed to be under the covers with someone often. If he wasn’t in bed with someone right now, he never would’ve noticed he had been horny for a while. He had worries that went beyond getting an orgasm.

But still … he had forgotten how fucking good it felt to just be naked with someone else, to feel the heat of another person’s body against his, to hear their breathing and his own in a symphony of pleasure. He was still human, he still had desires and he still wanted intimacy, even if it wouldn’t last, even if it was to pursue selfish pleasure.

“Oh, Beck!” Right. That was fun to hear too. Beck really liked it when his partner moaned his name in his ear. It was validating to know he was giving pleasure to his partner and that they enjoyed it.

“Do it again…” He heard, which made him smile.

“What?” He asked as he leaned down to take one hard nipple in his mouth, letting his tongue run over it before pulling away. “That?”

His lover moaned, a long and high-pitched whine that was music to his ear, and Beck repeated his action, always sucking harder on her nipple every time. His partner laid underneath him, eyes closed, savouring everything Beck did to pleasure her body. Her legs wrapped tightly around his waist, she responded to his mouth on her breast by squeezing him every time he’d gently pull on her sensitive nipple with his teeth. The little jolts this teasing brought her only heightened her excitement, made her louder.

Beck thrust into her with renewed energy the louder she got. Fuck, she was so perfect. She was just delicious. The way her body was in tandem with his, the way she responded so positively, the way her femininity took him effortlessly, a warm embrace Beck didn’t want to leave. Her hips bucked against his, matching the rhythm of his thrusts.

Soon, they were lost in a harmony of intense moaning that only ended when they reached the peak of their excitement. Beck’s lover shrieked as she came, and Beck followed soon after. **]]**

A few seconds later, the aspiring actor laid down on his back and let Melanie settle against his chest. Neither of them cared about how sweaty the other was. They were both extremely satisfied and slowly feeling exhaustion take over them. And as the exhaustion washed over Beck, who really wanted to spend the night in this bed, post-orgasm clarity followed, and the aspiring actor remembered he had a girlfriend. A girlfriend he had cheated on. After ten years of a good relationship, he had simply slept with the first girl to bat her eyes at him.

Beck felt regret and he waited a few minutes before moving out of the bed, gently moving Melanie. He had assumed she was asleep by now, and as much as he hated to run without warning her, he wanted to go home and hide his infidelity. By that, he meant shower.

To his surprise, just as he was getting dressed, Melanie sat up. She looked at him.

“Where are you going?” She asked him.

“I think I should go home. I’ve taken too much of your time,” Beck answered quickly, buckling his belt.

Melanie smiled. “You didn’t waste my time, trust me. I think you’ve given me the time of my life.”

“Very witty, I’ll give you that.”

Beck mentally scolded himself. He had to stop flirting with her! But it was just so easy and so fun to do.

“Stay. My roommate probably won’t be home until noon, you can sneak out then and I’ll give you a ride to the bar so you can get your car.”

Oh, right. Beck had left his car in the bar’s parking lot. Melanie had dragged him to hers and in his horniness, he hadn’t considered going home.

“I’ll take an Uber. Sleep, beautiful.”

Beck put his shirt on at the same time he kissed her temple. He didn’t know why he was doing that, but he hoped it was making his departure easier on the girl. Melanie didn’t argue this time, and only laid back down.

“I’ll text you,” she said.

Beck thought for a moment. “Do you have my number?”

“No. But now that I said I would text you; you have to give it to me.”

At that moment, Beck considered giving her a fake number, and then getting a new job at a different bar. He also considered acting like he would but then forget.

But he wanted her to have his number. Unless she had lied to him, she had precisely said her father had a production company and that he expected her to find talent. He was talent, and as much as he wanted to forget that night, he didn’t want to let go of that opportunity.

He looked on the desk in her bedroom for pen and paper, and wrote down his number with his name. Wishing her a good night, he left her apartment and waited for an Uber to drive him to the bar so he could get in his car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be sure to leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed, and stay tuned for the next chapter!


	7. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello! Another chapter is here. It took a little bit longer to edit, I wasn't feeling very creative for the past few days but I'm better. A small warning that after this chapter, I will slow down with the plot to let some character development through. I noticed I was rushing a bit too fast for my liking. Anyway, enjoy!

Tori wondered if Sophia always planned their meetings around her lunch hour; they were always either before or after the time most people took an hour to eat. Every time Tori met Sophia, the devil was either eating something or drinking something, and always more focused on her food than on Vega. Was it a way to assert fear and dominance? Was it Sophia sending the message to Tori that she was so unimportant she could be dealt with while eating on her break?

Whatever it was, and whatever the reason, Tori didn’t appreciate it. It was insulting, it was uncalled for. And Tori wasn’t the only one who didn’t like that treatment.

Today’s meeting was a little bit different than the others. Whenever Tori had to come to the office, which was maximum twice a month, she usually met with Jay first, then Sophia, and returned home. Sophia had changed the rules today, and everyone was in her office. Jay, Jade and her. Tori felt a little bit confident in herself. Jay was always supportive, and Jade was still stubbornly refusing to do anything until Sophia approved of Tori’s music. Tori had leverage against the devil today.

Sophia grabbed a piece of her hamburger, which she had cut in several little pieces, and shoved it in her mouth without a care, sucking sauce off her thumb. That got her a look of disgust from Jay, who was sitting next to her on a chair, legs crossed. She moved away carefully when Sophia offered her a piece especially full of sauce.

“Watch the dress; I just had it steam cleaned,” the Afro-American woman said, rearranging her white dress as she crossed her legs.

“Will you take the piece if I hand it to you with a napkin?” Sophia asked, reaching for a white napkin.

“No. I’ve already eaten.” Jay made a face and temporarily closed her eyes as she looked away. Sophia licked sauce off the piece, then shoved it in her mouth.

“You’re disgusting,” Jay added.

“Not my fault it’s my lunch hour.” Sophia shrugged, handing the fries box to Jade who was sitting across her desk. Jade refused the offer and Sophia shrugged.

“Speaking of, why are you meeting Tori if you’re on a lunch break?” Jade asked.

“I was with you this morning, remember?”

“You could’ve met with her this afternoon then.”

“No, I’m busy.”

“Tomorrow?”

“I wanted to see her now, what’s wrong with that?”

Jay and Jade didn’t seem to care about Sophia using her cold insouciance and harshly asking that question, but Tori did. Her tone had gotten sharper, she had sounded annoyed and almost dangerous. Jade remained quiet, crossing her arms. Jay gave Sophia’s meal one last look.

“Enjoy the cholesterol,” she told Sophia.

“Play the last song,” the head of Mangold replied to that little quip.

Jay used the computer mouse and pressed play. Tori’s last song started playing in the speakers in Sophia’s office, and this time everyone was quiet. Tori actually preferred them talking while her music played; it felt less intimidating, more intimate, more friendly.

“I changed the lyrics for that song like you said,” Tori told Sophia in the middle of it.

Sophia rolled her eyes but said nothing. She did loudly sip her jumbo-sized chocolate milkshake, before grabbing a couple of fries and dipping them in ketchup.

The last song ended, and Sophia was the first to break the silence.

“Ladies, opinions?” She asked, leaning back.

“That’s why you wanted us here?” Jay asked.

“Yes. We’re halfway through our six months and we’ve made no progress yet. Maybe I need another opinion.”

There was silence for a few seconds, which Jay broke. She looked at Tori, gave her a warm smile.

“Those songs are lovely,” she said.

Tori smiled, so happy that an outside opinion about her music was positive, and not viciously painful like Sophia’s was. When asked, Jade also replied that the music was very good and enjoyable.

“How long did it take you to make them?” Jay asked Tori.

Tori smiled at the publicist, feeling rightfully giddy now that two people had appreciated her music. “It took me a month. I had to rewrite the lyrics at the last minute because Sophia didn’t like them.”

Sophia scoffed, crossing her arms. “The new lyrics weren’t much of an improvement, Vega.”

“What?”

Tori looked at Sophia who was smiling smugly, staring at her. Her blue eyes felt intense on the brunette, and they never looked away. They just stared, deep into Tori’s soul. It was all it took to make Tori lose all of her confidence. A cold shiver ran through her, and even with Jade and Jay with her, she couldn’t find it in her to say anything or disagree with Sophia. The pop star and the publicist may have given their positive opinions, but the one that mattered had said otherwise.

“I hate these songs. They make me physically sick,” Sophia added.

Jay glared her. “If you stopped eating so much fast food, you wouldn’t be physically sick over a few songs.”

Sophia didn’t answer. She just shoved the rest of fries in her mouth. She was shameless.

“I hate these songs. I want new ones.” Sophia wiped her hands with the last of her clean napkins, before rounding up the boxes that had once contained her fries and her hamburger. She put it on the corner of the desk, on Tori’s side, and sipped her milkshake.

“What’s wrong with these songs?” Jade asked, gripping the arms of her chair tightly.

“They sound fake and generic. I don’t like them.”

Jade didn’t appreciate that answer from Sophia. The black-haired singer was ready to argue, and she would, and so was Jaylene as she sent her coworker harsh death glares. But before either of them could lay down their arguments (or insults in Jade’s case), Tori just shrugged.

“It’s fine, guys,” she softly said. “They just need a little bit of work.”

“Come on, Tori. One bad opinion does not mean you have to return to the studio and do all the work again.”

Jaylene was right. It was the third time Tori had given Sophia songs that she had swiftly rejected. Sophia didn’t know the work that went behind them, the sacrifices that Tori was doing. But even if the red-haired woman learned that Tori doubted it would change anything. Sophia was a cold woman.

“I mean, Tori, if you think otherwise, just tell me.” Sophia watched Tori like a hawk. Tori opened her mouth, then closed it and nodded.

“It’s fine. They need work.”

Jade seemed so shocked by that. The way Tori was just accepting one person calling her songs shit and giving up, without putting up a fight, without standing her ground. That couldn’t be happening.

“Tori, your songs are good. Defend them, defend yourself,” she said, feeling like she was begging. Wait, she was begging! She was begging for Tori to get a grip, to trust herself and have confidence in her abilities. Where had the stubborn teenage girl gone? What happened in ten years for her to go _boom_ into thin air and make way for this empty shell who just took beatings?

“If Sophia said they’re not, then they’re not. Let’s move on,” the Latina yelled.

There was awkward silence, with a building tension. Suddenly, Tori remembered something. She turned to look at her publicist.

“Jay, did you ever contact Trina’s team? What did they say?”

Jay looked nervous. She uncrossed her legs then crossed them again, reaching for the hem of her dress with her fingers. “Trina and her team don’t want to work with you at the moment.”

Sophia looked at Jay. Her main PR girl was being tactful with Tori. In fact, she had been very nice towards the aspiring singer, since day one too. Jay was usually a lot more straightforward; nicer, but also more honest. But now she was purposefully withholding information and Sophia couldn’t accept that, not with Tori.

“Why’s that? It’s bad enough they took so long to answer us, I don’t see why Tori’s sister wouldn’t work with her,” Sophia commented.

“Trina and her team said that, at the moment, they weren’t ready to bring in a new element in her environment.”

Everyone stared at Jay as if she had explained some complicated physics equation. Jay didn’t see anything wrong with what she had said, it made complete sense to her.

Sophia was the one to ask for clarification.

“Jay, what does that mean?” She said.

“Well, you know that Trina represents unbridled fun, careless behaviour and the over glorification of fame and wealth?”

Everyone nodded.

“Well, Tori doesn’t fit this image of Trina and her team doesn’t know how to include Tori’s softer and more elegant image.”

Sophia rudely put it in layman’s terms. “Basically, Tori is boring, and Trina isn’t.”

Jay seemed offended. She quickly cleared her throat. “I wouldn’t say that.”

“That’s what it sounds like. Trina is the teenager who just wants to have fun, and Tori is the stuck up one with a curfew.”

Tori tried to say anything, but no words came out of her mouth. Instead, she quickly thanked everyone and excused herself, leaving towards the elevator. Jade stood and followed her closely, getting into the elevator before it closed.

Jay waited until they were gone, and that the elevator was going down. She gave Sophia a hard look.

“What game are you playing?” She asked her boss.

“Jay, my love, my beautiful friend, my employee who has a roof over her head because of me.” That earned the manager a white and gold stiletto in the leg. “What were we doing while we were listening to Tori’s music?”

“Insulting you for being disgusting.”

“No. We were talking about something insignificant. Because me shortening my lifespan was more interesting than Tori’s music.”

“Weren’t we quiet for the last song?”

“And who tried to spark a conversation while it was playing? Tori herself. Face it, if people would rather focus on insignificant things rather than her music, we have a problem.”

“Who cares if people don’t focus on her song?”

“If people don’t focus on the song, they don’t focus on who’s singing it.”

“They could be radio hits.”

“But I don’t want to work with someone who makes radio hits. I want to work with an _artist_. And I know you do too. Or maybe you don’t care anymore.”

Jay glared her. She gritted her teeth. “Don’t play with me. You know I take pride and passion in my work. But the girl is this close to losing it. Why are you doing this to her?”

Sophia chuckled. “Be honest with me. Do you think she’ll make it in this industry?”

Jay shrugged and answered quickly, “Yes. You and I can market her.”

That earned an eye roll from Sophia.

“You know I don’t mean it like that,” the manager said. “Look at her personality, the way she acts. Do you think she has what it takes?”

Jay didn’t answer at first. She always tried to keep positive thoughts around her and her job, to be optimistic that everything would be fine. It was what kept her from going mad or turning into Sophia, who had let the cold and unforgiving reality of the industry they worked in take over.

“I think she does,” Jay answered, only to take a moment to think. She was gradually starting to see where Sophia was going, and she hated it. Sophia was right, and Jay was the one being delusional out of fear of the worst happening. Again. She didn’t want someone like Tori to go through what so many girls with dreams did. If Sophia was making a game out of destroying her self-confidence, she couldn’t stand back and watch.

“If I don’t do that, she’ll die from substance abuse,” Sophia said quickly.

The Afro-American woman scoffed. That was dramatic. “You don’t know that.”

“No, I do. And you do too. Come on. She has zero confidence, she’s naive and she just submits. You think she’ll survive people cancelling her? Nowadays, fans get offended if their favourite celebrity doesn’t interact with them. She has no substance either and I’m not surprised her sister chose business over family because of that.”

“You’re not helping her. Aren’t you her manager? You should be helping her develop these skills, not lie to her about her music and her personality.”

What was wrong with a sweet girl who stayed away from drama and whatever stupid shit most celebs did for attention? That would save Jay and her team hours of working on fixing any type of stupid drama someone un-Tori-like would get in.

“I am helping her. I am destroying her entire being. Then I’ll build her back up the way she should be. Unless you’re in the mood to deal with another suicide.”

Jay stood and walked to the window.

“You are insane!”

“I’m just honest. If she can’t defend her music to her own manager, you think she can to millions of people with opinions? You think she’ll handle someone making jokes about her? We want her to work with Trina, but you think she can handle the possible negative aspects that will come with that?”

Sophia stayed at her desk, comfortable in her leather chair.

“I’m being nice, you know. Me saying her music is trash, that she’s boring; in industry level of mean, that’s nothing. It takes guts to do what she dreams of doing. It’s exhausting and as a woman, the pressure is even higher to be perfect. Tori won’t make it. Objectively speaking, if she doesn’t get a grip, she will never make it.”

Jay gave up. She just quietly agreed. Sophia stood, taking the trash on her desk.

“Have you ever watched the show The King?” Sophia asked as she walked to her trash can and shoved her trash in it.

Jay was leaning against the window, arms crossed, staring into space. She had heard Sophia’s question and she was going through the information in her brain to find what her friend was referring to.

“Is it the show that was based on an online story written by a 14-year-old?”

Sophia nodded. “Couldn’t get past the first episode. It’s bad, Jay, real bad. Do you know who played the main character?”

Jay shook her head. No one who had played on this show was relevant at the moment, and the show was forgotten. All she knew was that it had a small but very loyal fan base.

“Why? Is it important?”

“Tori’s boyfriend, a certain Beck Oliver.”

Jay sighed. “And what am I supposed to do with that information?”

“I want to get some dirt on the boyfriend.”

“What if there’s no dirt on him?”

“I pray there’s no dirt on him.”

***

The elevator reached the main floor and Jade held onto Tori’s arm before she could storm out of the elevator.

“Tori, wait, calm down!” Jade said.

Tori violently pushed Jade away, surprising the singer as they walked out of the elevator. Jade watched Tori head for the front door of the building (a big no-no unless Sophia gave them explicit permission) and she followed her, grabbing her again to make her stop before she left. Jade wasn’t sure if there were paparazzi around and she didn’t want to risk anything, especially with Tori looking ready to fight anyone.

“Hey! What’s wrong?” Jade asked. What a stupid question, she knew what was wrong. She knew why Tori was acting like that. She had witnessed the abuse she didn’t know Sophia was capable of giving a human being, and then she had watched as Tori took it like some helpless simpleton.

Tori turned around, angry. Her hair was sticking out everywhere, her jacket was almost off her body, her bag was scrapping the door. Tori was an angry mess who wasn’t thinking straight, and Jade had to speak some sense into her before she did something stupid.

“My songs suck, that’s what’s wrong. My own sister doesn’t want to talk to me because I’m too boring for her stupid image!” Anger turned into frustration and Jade watched as Tori started sobbing, big tears leaving her eyes, taking with them some mascara.

Tori didn’t care that Joshua the secretary was looking at her as if she was insane. She started screaming into her hands, spreading a wet and messy stain of black on her palms.

“What the fuck is wrong with me? I can’t do shit, Jade! I’ve been trying so hard…”

“I understand.”

Giving Joshua a cold stare, making him resume his work, Jade grabbed Tori’s hand and led her to the backdoor of the office. Tori only started protesting when she saw Jade unlock the doors to her SUV.

“No, I want to go home.”

“We’re going to a home, don’t worry.”

Shoving Tori into the passenger seat, Jade shuddered as she heard Tori sob harder, leaning on the dashboard. She got in her car and started driving.

*******

_Tori watched Beck leave as she picked up the phone to answer her mother. It was the first time that she insisted that much to talk to Tori. Usually, she knew that her mom would call her a few times a week. Calling back to back like that was new, even though Tori had been avoiding talking to her after their last argument on the phone. Her mom had never brought it up during their text messages exchanges, however. Even though Tori was feeling content, she couldn’t help but think maybe something happened back home._

_“Hey, mom, what’s up?” Tori jovially asked._

_To her surprise, there was no warm greeting. Just an eerie silence on the other side of the line that shocked and surprised the aspiring singer._

_“You must be insane,” her mom finally said, and that confused Tori into speechlessness. What was she supposed to reply to that?_

_“What’s wrong, mom?”_

_“You know what’s wrong.”_

_Christ, no she didn’t. This was an impromptu phone call, where Tori had been deemed insane by the woman who had given birth to her. Tori didn’t have time for this game._

_“Mom, I’m really not sure what you’re talking about.”_

_“Why are you like this?” Her mother asked. “Do you do it on purpose? Did you do it out of spite?”_

_“What did I do?” Tori was losing patience, gripping her little phone just a bit tighter into her hands._

_“I told you to come home. Instead, you got signed to a manager?”_

_Oh. Her mother either saw the tweet or Trina told her about it. Either way, this was bad. Tori remembered how adamant her mother was that she chose a different and more financially stable vocation, and finding out that instead, she had signed a contract, was perhaps just the thing that finally made Mrs. Vega lose it._

_Making sure Beck wasn’t near her to hear, Tori whispered, “It’s only six months. My manager is just seeing what I can do.”_

_Five months now, but Tori didn’t mention it. If she had thought this would reassure her mother, it didn’t. Her mom didn’t seem to care at all._

_“I told you to come home. I don’t care about how long you’re signed for, it’s over. Move on, Tori.”_

_“If it doesn’t work out, I promise I’m going home with Beck.” Tori sighed and said, “Mom, just believe in me, please.”_

_“I believed in you and you still failed.”_

_Tori barely registered her mom’s backtracking and her apology. She just hung up the phone. Staring blankly into space, she quickly blocked her mother’s phone number and removed the battery from her phone, shoving all the items in her bag. She rapidly blinked away the tears as Beck came back and sat down next to her on the couch, giving her a little kiss._

_“I’m proud of you, you know. Told you you can do anything you set your mind to.”_

_With one last kiss on her cheek, he turned on the television and continued his Netflix show. Meanwhile, Tori only watched without registering what was happening. The words still haunted her. More importantly, the disgusting feeling that she had let her mother down weighed on her._

*******

Jade parked her car in her garage and let Tori out first. She had calmed down during the ride, cleaned up a little, but still stayed quiet, and Jade hadn’t dared say anything. She didn’t know how to handle Tori, or what to handle. The way she had let Sophia walk all over her, or how she had just accepted that her own sister refused to work with her? Jade was pissed, Jade was furious. Jade realized that Tori was perhaps not meant to do this. She didn’t want to believe it, not after going to school with her, where everyone was certain it was her destiny, but she had witnessed someone let themselves get walked over, then have a breakdown in public.

Jade unlocked the door that led to her kitchen and let Tori in.

“Living room is over there.” She pointed the large space.

“I want a drink,” Tori said.

Great, after the breakdown, alcohol. This would be such an interesting afternoon.

“There’s beer in the fridge, wine in the cellar. Take your pic.”

“No, I want a real drink.”

That made Jade smirk. With a little chuckle, she said, “So my superstar likes real drinks. What did you have in mind?”

“A bloody Mary. Or a screwdriver. I’ll settle for liquor.”

Tori settled on the floor of Jade’s living room, leaning against the table, looking defeated. Jade walked to her bar and took a bottle of vodka from the shelves. Taking two glasses, she walked to her living room and sat down on the couch, pouring the clear liquid in them. Tori drank hers in one gulp.

“Slow down, superstar,”

“No. Serve me again.”

Jade didn’t feel like being a bartender, so she settled for handing Tori the bottle. Tori abandoned her glass and drank directly from it.

“I see you can handle your liquor…” Jade said.

“I just need a drink, just to clear my thoughts.”

Jade didn’t know many people who got intoxicated to think clearer but she chose to bite her tongue.

“I’ll call Sophia tomorrow and tell her I’m not working with her anymore.” Tori suddenly announced.

Jade barely sipped her own drink. She put it down on the table.

“You want to fire my manager?”

“No. I want to stop. I’m done trying to be a singer.”

Jade frowned. “Why?”

Tori took a gulp of the vodka. Even Jade couldn’t handle such strong drinks in so little time, and she watched as Tori drank it all like water. How could she handle the smell, the taste, the feeling as it got down to her stomach? She had strong genes, or she was predisposed to addiction. Either way, Jade carefully looked at her, ready to lock her bar if needed.

“It’s not working for me. Maybe I wasn’t meant to be a singer.”

“Since when does Tori Vega give up?” Jade wondered.

“Since Tori Vega’s been working on songs for two months and still failing.”

“Your songs were fucking good.”

Tori didn’t answer at first. She finished the bottle, then let it drop on the carpeted floor. It didn’t break, thank God.

“Sophia didn’t like them.”

Still comfortably sitting on the couch Jade watched Tori stand. She dusted her pants then pointed to the bar.

“What more do you have, rich girl?” Tori disappeared into Jade’s bar before letting the pop star answer. It was a room adjacent to the kitchen and the living room, with different bottles of all kinds of liquors and other alcoholic liquids sat on shelves or stored away.

“Tori, I don’t have that much vodka.” Jade called.

Tori came back. “It’s okay, I found some Jack Daniels. But I’m not sharing.”

Jade was as amused as she was worried, and she watched as Tori opened the bottle and took a quick gulp. The Latina sighed in satisfaction, then put the bottle down next to her.

“Tori, Sophia is your manager, not your god. You don’t have to do everything she tells you to do.”

Tori licked the neck of the bottle, before she took another sip.

“You’re the one who said I couldn’t be picky and keep my convictions.”

“But there’s a difference. There’s a difference between being unreasonable and letting someone walk all over you.”

Tori shrugged. “Whatever, I made up my mind. How big is your place?”

“A few bedrooms, way too many bathrooms, cool basement. I can let you visit if you want.”

Tori stood a bit wobbly, clutching the bottle of Jack Daniels. Like an excited child, she nodded and followed Jade as the tour started upstairs. Jade’s house was moderately modest compared to what some people within her tax bracket got themselves. The house was on a hill, by the mountains and the forest. The architecture was modern, but the decorating was dark and morbid; exactly Jade’s style. Jade had renovated her home to have everything she needed inside and avoid going out. She still had more rooms than a single human needed.

Tori commented on everything. Everything. From the colours to the empty rooms she didn’t like, to the way she was jealous and how she would’ve chosen a bigger pool and added a waterslide. Jade was amused as she watched the intoxicated Latina put herself in her position, and loudly say what she would’ve done, or could’ve done.

“I’m still angry you took my spot for the Platinum Music Awards,” Tori said at some point as they finished the tour of the upper floor and headed for the basement.

At a loss for words, Jade shrugged and said, “Well, sorry.”

Tori temporarily disappeared to get herself another bottle of whatever liquor Jade had in her little bar. She came back just as she was opening it up. Tori Vega was going to die of alcohol poisoning in Jade’s home, damn.

“No biggie anymore. We’ll have a song together, then I’ll be a star and Beck and I will be happy again.”

That was an interesting insight into the Latina’s current relationship. Jade hadn’t expected such honesty.

They reached Jade’s home studio. It was a small, basic studio meant to let down ideas and demos before she went to the real studio and have them recorded. It was also where she did most of her creative things.

“You have a white board!” Tori exclaimed, looking at it. She threw the half-empty bottle of liquor on the nearest chair and walked to it.

Jade caught the bottle before it rolled on the floor and broke. “Yeah I use it to write down ideas and stuff.”

It was empty. She hadn’t done anything other than keep her vocal cords active by practising. She was actually excited to start the music process again. As much as she preferred directing movies and such, she had missed music and she was excited to combine both of her passions into one. Once Sophia approved of Tori’s music. Jade was pissed she had to wait for her manager’s approval to do anything. She had sought out Sophia because the woman had a reputation of giving her artist refreshing freedom. Jade wasn’t sure where that freedom was, but she was waiting.

Tori grabbed a pen and started writing on the board. Jade watched. Then she laughed.

“Damn, Vega.”

“It’s true. She’s a bitch.”

The words “Sophia is a bitch” were now on her board with each word a different colour. And honestly, Jade thought it was funny.

“I wish I could tell her in her face,” Tori muttered, obnoxiously extending the last syllable.

After drawing little hearts around the words, and a compliment for Jay, Tori looked like she had a breakthrough, or an amazing idea. She took out her phone and dialled Sophia.

Sophia was quick to answer, and she didn’t mention either the breakdown in her waiting room or the fact that they had seen each other a mere two hours ago.

“Vega? How are you?”

“I’m very bad.”

“Why’s that?”

“You hurt my feelings. You said my songs were bad.”

“They are. I’m sorry you can’t handle the truth.”

“No. Shut up. My songs were good. It took me two months to finish them. You are mean and I’m sick of your shit.”

Jade realized who was on the line and walked to Tori.

“Okay Vega, say goodbye to Sophia.” Jade was about to reach for the phone, but Tori pushed her away, then ran under a table to hide and continue her conversation.

“Tori, tell Jade we have a meeting tomorrow.”

“No. Do it yourself.”

“Okay.”

There was laughter on Sophia’s side of the phone, not from Sophia, however. Tori walked to Jade and handed her the phone.

“It’s Sophia. She’s going to tell you that you have a meeting with her tomorrow.”

Tori got distracted by the board again and insulted Sophia by writing everything on it, as if she was making sure not to forget the insults meant for her manager. There were a few compliments for Jay, along with a note that mentioned making sure to ask her where she got her perfume. Jade wasn’t as amused as Sophia and whoever she was talking to was.

“Sophia, you can suck my clit.” She said.

“No, we have to keep a professional relationship.”

“Don’t fuck with me. Why would you tell Tori her songs were bad?”

“One day, you’ll get to see things my way, and understand why I do things a certain way. Please make sure my client doesn’t do anything more stupid than insulting her manager.”

“Fuck you. Sincerely.”

“Five more years to go with me. Have fun, you two.”

Sophia hung up. Jade looked at Tori as she wrote the most self-deprecating things on the board.

“Let’s get chicken wings.” Tori exclaimed, dropping the pens.

“No, I should bring you home. Beck has to be worried about you.”

That made Tori pout. She stuck out her lower lip and crossed her arms. “No, he’s bartending. He won’t be home for a while.”

Jade smiled. Why was it so absolutely cute to watch Vega act like a toddler?

Jade still headed for the door, watching with satisfaction Tori who followed her.

“You should still get home. What if he calls to check on you?” She said.

“No, it’s fine.” Tori started to laugh. “Are you in love with Beck?”

Jade’s stomach curled in disgust. “God no. I think I’ve moved on.”

“Good, cuz he fucking hates your guts. He doesn’t know we’re gonna do a song together.”

“What will happen if he finds out?”

“He’ll stop me. Cuz he’s stubborn. I’m doing this so our lives get better. He can’t get a role anywhere right now, it sucks.”

Tori insisted for the chicken wings after writing more insults towards herself on the board. One of them stuck with Jade and she took a picture of it. By now, Tori was gone, claiming she was going to get more stuff to drink while they ordered chicken wings. Even though it was irresponsible, Jade let Tori go. She just stared at the insult, unsure how to feel. It looked like an absolute breakthrough that was worth keeping.

_Little Miss Boring_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed. Be sure to leave kudos and comments! Stay tuned!


	8. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while, I know! Classes have started for me and I have to focus on my online classes. This chapter was cut and so it's shorter, but I decided the next one would be centered on Jade.
> 
> Anyway, enough of my rambling, read on!
> 
> (Editing might not be perfect, I apologize in advance).

Jade could barely feel her face or her muscles. She wondered if she would have the energy to wipe her makeup off her face and go to bed. The A-list superstar looked at the time as she stifled a yawn. It was almost two in the morning. Usually she’d be in bed by now, especially when she knew she had a very long day ahead of her. There was just one small issue that kept her from her comfortable king-size bed: Tori Vega, who was not only still in her home like it was now hers, but also very inebriated and, at the moment, eating like a starved child. The aspiring singer was lucky Jade had grown to be generous and patient over the years. Otherwise, she would’ve thrown Tori out a long time ago. In just a few hours, the girl had eaten fries, chicken wings, tacos; she had drank way too much not to die of alcohol poisoning, danced on the couch and done karaoke to the point her voice sounded hoarse. And she still wasn’t tired, just sluggish and calmer, with now no access to the bar or delivery services.

“Tori, shouldn’t you go home?” Jade said after stifling another yawn. She and Tori were sitting on the couch, facing one another. Jade was clutching one pillow as she leaned against the armrest. Tori had decided to show Jade her current interests, and for some reason, they all involved showing Jade inspiration pictures and a vision board. Jade couldn’t care less about these pictures or whatever gave Tori the strength to keep dreaming and trying, but she still found it reassuring; Tori still had a little bit of hope left in her, and that was all she needed.

Tori looked away from her phone and gave Jade a pained look at the suggestion. She looked like a child who had just been told it was time to go to bed. Technically, it was the case.

“But I wanna keep having fun,” she said in a high pitched and whiney tone. “Tomorrow, I’ll have work and it’s … ugh, no. Let’s have a sleepover instead.”

_Jesus, no. Let’s not have a sleepover_. The thought of drunk Tori staying the night here sent goosebumps down Jade’s spine. Plus, who knew when she’d sleep and Jade didn’t know what kind of hangovers Tori had. Was she the type of person to puke? Because there would be no vomit in her home, that was for sure.

“Tori, let me just drive you home?” Jade insisted, pushing the pillow away from her.

Tori only gave her puppy dog eyes as she clutched her phone in her hand.

“Later?” She squeaked, hopeful.

No. Now. Jade was getting a headache, she wanted to go to bed already. If there was one thing she didn’t play with, it was her slumber. Jade made sure to get at least eight hours of sleep every night and she wanted them now. She could remember (not fondly) the times where all she could manage was four or five hours of sleep because of an erratic schedule, and every time she could get more, she made sure to enjoy it and take full advantage of it.

Jade was almost tempted to let Tori spend the night here, only to decide to use a different tactic. If pleading wouldn’t work, maybe the thought of her possibly worried boyfriend would.

“Isn’t Beck worried about you, by now?”

“No, he’s working, I told you.”

Jade had planted the seed and it had died instantly. Tori could clearly give two fucks about her guy because, apparently, he was at work. That logic made Jade frown. So what Beck was working? He didn’t have short breaks where he could give his girlfriend a call, make sure she was home fine? Her patience was thinning by the second and she was very close to dragging the Latina to her car and shoving her inside. What could convince Tori to just go to the garage and get in the car?

“Tori, you need sleep. You’ll have work in the morning and you can’t be tired,” Jade said. She was talking to a grown woman as if she was a toddler, Christ. How more pathetic could this day get?

“I don’t care. My jobs are boring anyway.” There was a pause as Tori started typing something on her phone. “I should stop showing up.”

Jobs in plural? That made Jade curious and she couldn’t help herself as she decided to dig in. She did want Tori out of her home, but she did want to know what was going on in her life. Maybe it’d help to see how and what Tori lived daily, and hopefully it would help Sophia in both her job and cause to have some level of empathy.

“Where do you work?” Jade asked.

“In the morning, I’m a barista. At night, I’m a server.”

Interesting. Jade hadn’t expected Tori to say that she was an accountant, but she certainly hadn’t expected her to say she was working those jobs. Obviously, there was no shame in that and Jade couldn’t care less about the nature of the job as long as it kept that person above water. Los Angeles was known for being batshit expensive and it wasn’t a surprise to see people work multiple jobs, have roommates or anything similar. Most people didn’t really mind either. It was life. It was unfair but it was life.

Tori looked at Jade, ending that subject by asking for her opinion. “What do you think of that sentence: “ _I thank you for the help you provided towards my career, but I believe it is best if I part ways with you and your enterprise from now on_.”

Jade raised an eyebrow slowly. Tori was inebriated as hell, but somehow, she still managed to sound very professional as she wrote what Jade assumed was a resignation letter, or whatever letting go of your manager was called.

“You’re really serious about leaving Managold and Sophia?” Jade asked.

Tori didn’t seem to notice or care that Jade hadn’t given her an answer to her question. She only requested access to the printer in Jade’s office to print her letter. Jade had recommended email, but this fell on deaf ears as Tori simply sent her letter to the printer and resumed whatever she had been doing before.

“Yep. I can’t continue. It’s not working,” Tori said once she sat down on the couch and settled.

“So you’ll find a different manager then? Since you almost worked with Sophia, you might be able to find someone else—”

Tori looked at Jade and that made the pop star halt mid-sentence. Her gaze was sharp, before Tori looked down.

“No, I don’t mean find a different manager. I mean … do something else. Focus on something else.”

Unbelievable. Jade frowned, toying with the rings around her fingers. “One person hates your music, so you’ve decided to stop everything?”

Tori shrugged. “She’s the best and it didn’t work.”

“That doesn’t mean give up. Maybe there’s something else that will work.”

Tori didn’t seem to care. She only shrugged again, wiping underneath her nose and sniffing.

“My mom would disagree with you.”

She was quiet and not smiling now, just wearing a constant poker face. Jade decided it was time to insist that Tori went home. The mood had died.

“Well, you should go home so you’re not tired for work.”

“I don’t care. I hate those jobs.”

The word _why_ was on Jade’s lips, but the singer didn’t have to say it. Tori started ranting, clutching her phone in her hand so tightly Jade thought it’d break. She was ranting about her bosses, her coworkers, the commute time, what she was supposed to do, how tired she was of these jobs and how she wanted something else, deserved something else, was desperate for something else.

“I shouldn’t be working at these places. I should be doing anything else,” Tori whined.

Unsure of what to do to possibly defuse this meltdown, Jade tiredly said, “Tori, come on, they’re not so bad.” They genuinely did not sound bad to the singer. Barista ? Server? Tori could be doing literally anything else.

That comment, however, only managed to infuriate the brunette, who turned to glare Jade.

“How would you know? You’ve been rich and famous since the age of sixteen! You give me money like it’s pocket change.”

Tori’s voice elevated so much she was shrieking. If Jade didn’t live virtually isolated, that would’ve alerted possible neighbours.

Fearing how the situation could escalate, Jade chose to simply agree with the Latina. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I should’ve been considerate.”

But Tori was standing now, pacing in front of the couch, panting loudly, still rambling but pretty much repeating the same thing over and over again. Then it seemed to culminate, and as if she was a volcano, she exploded.

“Those jobs are shit, my family is shit, my boyfriend is shit, it’s all just shit!”

Jade watched as Tori threw her phone on the ground violently. Even with the carpeted floor, the impact caused the screen to not only shatter, but make the phone go offline completely. Tori had a moment of lucidity and she screamed bloody murder as she knelt in front of the dead phone. She ignored the shards of glass pricking her finger as she tried to reanimate it. She shook it, pressed the power button repeatedly, smacked the screen. Nothing happened, nothing responded.

Jade watched as Tori pathetically started sobbing, curling up against the couch on the floor. Jade sat down next to Tori and reached to give her a hug, shushing her and giving her little pats on the back.

“Why is this happening to me?” Tori whined, still crying.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, I’ll buy you a new one.”

That set Tori off. “Stop buying me things!”

Jade said nothing, only comforted Tori until the girl herself decided to go home. She wobbly stood and went to put her shoes on. Jade realized how disconnected she was to reality and Tori’s. She didn’t fully know the girl’s troubles and even if she could, she could never fully relate or bring support that wasn’t superficial or materialistic. Jade was living a different life; one people could only dream of until death, and she started seeing the extent of what that meant. She had lived relatively isolated, her only friends being the few ones she had had in high school, or people in her tax bracket. She now saw the extent of her privilege and what it could do to someone outside her world.

Tori seemed ready to go, and Jade followed her to her garage. Tori got into the car quietly, head down. And her head was down until Jade parked her car in front of the apartment.

Tori clutched her broken phone in her hand, her free one holding the handle to open the door.

In a low voice, Tori said, “Don’t buy me another phone.”

Jade frowned and looked at Tori. The Latina still had her head down, flipping the phone around in her hand. It was absolutely shattered. It would cost hundreds to fix, if it even could be fixed. Jade somehow doubted Tori would bother fixing it. Buying a new one was definitely cheaper, and that sentence alone said a lot about the way people overconsumed.

The car door open, Tori turned her head to look at Jade. “If you see me as a friend, don’t buy me another phone.”

“Fine. Night, Tori…”

Tori only slammed the car door shut once she stepped out, and Jade watched as Tori went inside her home.

*******

When Beck got home, around 4 am, the first thing he did was jump in the shower and scrub his entire body. Hard. Just really cover himself in soap and bubbles as if maybe that would make the stain of his infidelity disappear one way or another. When hot water hit his back, he hissed in slight pain, realizing now that Melanie had scratched him during their very hot and pleasant sex, which had left marks that seemed to go from his upper back to the middle, if the pain was anything to take into account. Beck felt panic rise up in his throat; that would be impossible to cover or hide! He wasn’t making a habit out of walking around the house shirtless, but if Tori ever caught him out of the shower, or dressing up, she’d see them until they healed. They might even cause scars and it would be hard to explain to his girlfriend.

That was a worry for another time. For now, he needed to scrub himself then make sure there was no evidence in his car. The fact that Tori rarely drove his car didn’t mean he couldn’t make sure there was nothing to betray him. Whether it was an earring, a little bracelet, a loose number, even a scent or whatever. Maybe he was being paranoid, but he’d seen the drama in other people. If Tori found out he had cheated, she would take the first bus back to Hollywood and her mother’s house, leaving him alone to chase his dreams and he couldn’t let that happen. Beck couldn’t let Tori go anywhere. He simply couldn’t.

Beck left the bathroom and made sure to dry himself well. He headed for the bedroom, making sure to keep all the lights off. He could see the bed and he could see Tori sleeping in a strange position, snoring slightly. Quietly, in the dark, he searched for a pair of sweatpants and a shirt to put on, happy their wardrobe was organized. He walked over to Tori as she slept comfortably, and he could smell the liquor from her open mouth. Had she been drinking? Where? With whom? Was she wasted?

No. Not now, he thought. Beck quickly went to his car. He spent a good fifteen minutes searching his car with the flashlight of his phone for anything, and luckily, there was nothing. He went back upstairs and looked into the bedroom, hoping Tori was still asleep and hadn’t been woken up by him. She hadn’t even moved, and he would’ve been worried if he wasn’t hearing her slightly snoring.

Suddenly feeling exhausted by the worry and the half hour he spent making sure he was keeping it a secret; Beck was about to get into bed with her when he felt something stop him. He wished he could say it was guilt, him feeling bad for cheating on her. But he wasn’t feeling that guilt. Not anymore. He wasn’t feeling awful. He was in the clear, after all; Tori would never meet Melanie, he could hide the scratches by keeping his shirt on.

Beck realized a bit horrified as he got into bed next to Tori that he felt fine. One might even say proud, and that completely confused him. He had been faithful and loyal to Tori for a decade now. The number of girls in both high school and college that had tried to get him in their beds one way or another was astronomical, and yet he had never wavered, never even thought about someone else. Tori had always been in his heart and mind, always been the most important person in his life.

Beck knew, as he stared at Tori, that it was still the case. So where was the guilt, the sadness, the anger of betraying the woman he saw as the love of his life? The aspiring actor put his hand on her hip, let his hand trail up. He felt her abdomen, her pelvis; he felt her warmth and knew he was lusting after her. Moving a bit closer to her, he wrapped his arm around her and kissed her cheek.

“I did something,” he whispered, combing her hair with his fingers. “But I did it for us.”

Tori didn’t move, still asleep. Beck chuckled, knowing she would have a harsh hangover. Keeping her close to him, he whispered before falling asleep, “I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Make sure to comment and leave kudos if you haven't already. Stay tuned for the next one!


	9. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know, it's been around two months. I have to be honest, I struggled to write this chapter until yesterday, where I finished it at 1 in the morning. I am happy with the result. Also, things have been very rough for me lately, especially emotionally, with quarantine and college classes being online and all. I still have a lot of exams but I took a small very necessary break to write this.
> 
> I have no idea when the next chapter will be but I'm for sure not abandoning this. I love this story.
> 
> Also, Victoria Justice is releasing a song this week. Yes, that's important information.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy this lowkey Jade-centered chapter with a glimpse into the madness that is Sophia.

When Jade started hearing birds chirping from the open door of her balcony, she cursed herself. It wasn’t that she hated birds, on the contrary. They left her indifferent. If as a teenager she had spent most of her time disliking many things, as an adult, she was more emotionally balanced and realistic. That didn’t mean she cared for them; she found them annoying. She didn’t like walking next to their shit or under them when they flew (because apparently, their rectums never closed and there was always a chance of being at the wrong place at the wrong time with a bird above you). No. Jade was angry at what it meant to hear birds chirping after hours of staring at her ceiling. In Los Angeles, birds started chirping around four or five in the morning, even if the sun wasn’t up yet. If she could hear them, it meant the singer had not slept even a minute and had stayed awake all night long. Her fear of going to bed too late had turned into her worse nightmare: insomnia. She would spend the upcoming day feeling sluggish, unmotivated, and irritable. And she had a busy day ahead of herself. Well, shit. Honestly, shit and fuck.

And that was all of Tori Vega’s fault. The aspiring singer and her drunken shenanigans had screwed with Jade’s sleep cycle. The popstar did not like having her sleep schedule screwed with. She enjoyed at least eight hours of sleep every night, regardless of the situation or her schedule. Whether she was staying home or running around Los Angeles or the world for all sorts of reasons, Jade needed to sleep. And if she had a busy day ahead of her, she was not going to go through it drinking coffee and energy drinks like water.

The acclaimed singer laid in bed virtually motionless, staring at the ceiling. Her eyes felt dry, with heavy bags underneath them. She couldn’t see any light in her room, but this was just a hopeless consolation, because the birds kept chirping and she knew her dark curtains would filter the first rays of sun. She was tempted to close her window, but Jade knew if she left the comfort of her bed, she wouldn’t be able to go back to it after.

Gradually, she could see the sun pierce through her thin black curtains, and her ceiling fan gradually became clearer and clearer to see. And as light made its way into her bedroom, realization and honesty dawned on the singer like the sun dawned on Los Angeles. Blaming Vega for her sleepless night was quite dishonest. Tori wasn’t to blame. At all. Jade’s guilt was. Tori’s actions the night before had simply triggered said guilt. The moment her head had hit the soft black pillow, Jade had suddenly gotten overwhelmed with thoughts, what ifs. Was Tori’s life as such because of her? Working two minimum wage jobs, living in a small apartment that was too expensive, chasing a dream she just couldn’t let go… Was Jade’s choice from ten years ago to blame for that? Was her dragging Tori into her world to blame also? Was it logical to blame herself when all she had done was say yes to Mason? Had Jade, in a way or another, doomed Tori to the unhappiness she clearly seemed to live?

Jade turned around, getting to the conclusion that it was pointless to stay in bed and hope to sleep. Even if she somehow managed, she would only end up waking up around noon and still be tired. It was better to be productive and hope she could nap in the afternoon or go to bed a little bit earlier.

Reluctantly, letting a loud groan escape her, she got out of bed and begrudgingly grabbed her phone. She removed it from its charger and turned it on. While she let several dozen notifications make it vibrate, she went through her text messaging app. The last text had been received a mere minutes ago, from Sophia. Did her manager need her? Why was her manager awake at six in the morning?

 **S** : **_See me at lunch_**

Jade would’ve been confused about this impromptu meeting if it wasn’t for the text bubbles above Sophia’s. Apparently, at around 2 in the morning, Jade had told Sophia very simply that Tori had quit and had sent a blurry picture of the letter. Said letter was in her living room and as Jade confirmed that she would be there to watch her manager eat like the glutton she was, she decided to bring the letter along. Sophia was acting like a high school bully and she had to deal with the consequences of her actions. The consequence was Tori leaving her agency, and Jade doubted it would look good for Sophia to have a client walk out.

Or would it look bad on Tori for walking out on Sophia? Sophia was… Sophia. She was one of the big shot managers that people would kill to have. The woman’s contact list was enviable and her best addition, her fierce publicist, only made her more important. The manager’s harsh and tough love behaviour was no secret in the industry, and if Tori ever hoped to get a new manager, it probably would not look good in the eyes of a nicer manager. Especially since Tori had done nothing in six months and was somehow uncooperative.

Then again, this was nothing but speculation. Maybe it would be fine for Tori. Maybe Tori would do something else with her life. Maybe Jade was thinking too much and had been staring at her screen for fifteen minutes as she plotted worst case scenarios.

 **J** : **_I’ll be there_**

Oh yes, she would. She would give Sophia a piece of her mind and perhaps even put her own career on the line. Whatever she did, the redhead bully managing her would have to get the damn message.

*******

Sophia hated Los Angeles. She hated how expensive it was, how crowded and eccentric it was. It was not the place to raise a family at all and she often wondered if she should move for the sake of her toddlers. She was amongst the most financially comfortable people in this city but even she could admit that there were limits to some things, especially price tags. However, if there was one thing about the city of angels that was fun, it was how it made the expression “hiding in plain sight” that much more real. Because the best way to hide in Los Angeles was by not trying to hide. Where she met her clients, where she had decided to place her office, even where she lived: all in plain sight to an extent. And people were still struggling to catch a glimpse of her or anyone she represented when they went to see her. People were too logical: “No way Sophia Brigh would move her offices downtown, surrounded by skyscrapers and large crowds every day.”

Well, she did. And people still hadn’t fully figured it out. Paparazzi were roaming around occasionally, but it was usually quiet and safe. For Los Angeles anyway.

As she made herself comfortable on the red booth and put her purse down on the wooden table, Sophia looked at Jade. Aware of how to hide in Los Angeles didn’t mean Sophia was dumb enough to push her luck, and she had wisely chosen to sit in a dark corner of the restaurant she was ordering her lunch from. The restaurant was very close to the office, which was why Sophia had chosen it in the first place for such a meeting. It was also usually very empty and private at this time. Yes, a quiet and empty restaurant around lunch hour downtown of Los Angeles. That was possible. The best place to hide from the vultures was right under their own nest. While paparazzi filled the overrated restaurants’ parkings in hopes of catching celebrities, Sophia invited her clients to eat at small places where the cooks screamed at each other and where the food looked questionable but tasted good.

Hiding in plain sight.

Sophia leaned back in the red and damaged leather. The aromas made her hunger worse. Sophia was a foodie; she’d always admit that. A way to enjoy life in this modern society was through food. She ate and enjoyed everything. She hated nothing, loved everything. Even if it looked questionable or tasted strange, she’d happily eat it. She was just that simple and that much of a foodie.

“If you’re hungry, order anything,” she told Jade. “By the time we’re done, it’ll be there. But I’m not paying.”

Her joke was meant to lighten the mood a little, though that was so clearly a stupid attempt destined to fail. She didn’t exactly want to lighten the mood anyway. No, she enjoyed her client’s anger and annoyance. Jade West looked exhausted and on the verge of breaking something. As long as it wasn’t her jaw, Sophia couldn’t care less and she would enjoy this free show.

The manager had to admit that the situation was just so amusing and entertaining. How could she contain her devilish curiosity in such a movie plot situation? She had an A-list singer stubbornly refusing to do anything without her unknown friend. Said celebrity was even acting like a secretary, wanting to meet to warn her that an underperforming client was quitting. All of this for so little. It definitely had some reasons that would be incredibly fun to uncover. Even if Tori quit working with her, Jade would find a way to help her friend out and maybe keep her close. The question was why and how could Sophia exploit it.

Maybe she was a bad person after all. Or maybe that psychology degree had turned her way of dealing with other humans too complicated for nothing.

When Jade reached into the pocket of her black hoodie and threw on the table a folded piece of paper, Sophia’s smirk she had had for a while now turned into a large self-sufficient smile that made her client shudder in anger. Sophia took the folder piece of paper, unfolded it and read it quickly. She smiled, looking up at Jade and her own reflection in the sunglasses her client wore.

“How much is Vega paying you to be her secretary?” She asked, putting the piece of paper away.

That only confused Jade. The black-haired young woman removed her glasses and looked at her manager in disbelief. Aside from the terrifying grin she wore like a beast looking at a weak prey, Sophia was calm and confident. It was scary, even for Jade. No one could be that cold, enjoy the current circumstances and claim they were human.

“That’s what you have to say? Didn’t you read this?” The singer asked, grabbing the discarded letter and waving it around as if it would do something.

Sophia shrugged, looking at her manicured French nails. “I did. You got my answer.”

“Tori wants to stop working with you.”

“Then Tori will have to come and talk to me, not send me her messenger.” Sophia shrugged, looking at an employee at the cash register as they took someone’s order. “She should know I shoot everyone.”

Jade accidentally crushed the letter in her fist in her annoyance. That woman was incredibly infuriating, and the way she was sitting there not giving a fuck was driving her to the edge of madness.

“Tori wants to stop working with you,” the raven-haired woman said very slowly.

Why did Jade think repeating herself would change anything? Sophia’s answer was not going to be any different and saying it slowly was condescending.

Refraining from rolling her eyes, Sophia said, “I get and respect that.”

Squeezing her sunglasses in her hands, Jade said, “You are probably one of the most influential managers there is out there. Someone wants to stop working with you, and you don’t care?”

“What’s wrong with that? Do you know how many people stopped working with me for all reasons? It’s a hazard of the job.”

Jade glared her manager, who smugly smiled without a care in the world.

“Fine. I want to stop working with you too,” she said.

“Alright. We’ll contact our respective lawyers and settle for something fair for the both of us.”

Jade almost choked on her surprise. Sophia didn’t seem to care at all that her biggest new addition was willing to walk on her too. Jade could imagine the bad press, the hit her reputation would take. Jade was even more shocked that it hadn’t worked. Threatening to quit had been her only option, her only leverage and her only hope at making Sophia understand that she was serious and that her project with Tori was just as serious.

But no. Sophia kept waiting for her food, looking into Jade’s soul with her cold and empty and mischievous eyes.

“Are you serious?” Jade stuttered, suddenly scared. She was blinded for a moment by light. What light, she wouldn’t be able to say. Common sense, maybe. Anger, perhaps. Or The Holy Ghost telling her to run from Brigh.

“Yes.”

Jade leaned back in shock. No, she was not shocked anymore. She was desperate, weak, and hopeless.

“You’re unbelievable,” the singer exclaimed.

Sophia frowned, looking confused, though Jade doubted that it was genuine confusion.

“I respect you, that’s all. You want to leave, why would I keep you? You might just be freeing a spot for a new client.”

Sophia started chuckling, then started laughing. Jade bit her lip. Fuck, Sophia was scary. She looked Jade in the eye.

“I’m feeling generous so if you leave within the next ten seconds, we can skip the legal battle. I’ll shred our contract and you’ll be free to go work with Tori and someone else.”

That scared Jade. She had assumed Sophia losing her was going to be an issue. Turns out it was the other way around: Jade losing Sophia was an issue. Jade was big enough to secure a different manager, of course. Any manager finding out she was unsigned would rush to sign her. But Jade didn’t want a different manager, she wanted Sophia. She had fought for Sophia for months, after all. Why? Well, that was a question that would be left unanswered.

Jade must have looked contemplative because Sophia lost her soul-devouring smile. She had a straight face on, and she crossed her arms.

“Can I ask you something?” The manager asked.

Jade shrugged, pitifully resting her head on the table, arms covering her and what was left of her dignity. Sophia didn’t comment on that and asked her question anyway.

“Why are you doing this?”

“Why am I doing what?”

“Giving me a resignation letter on Tori’s behalf, almost walking out yourself in solidarity … why are you so intent on working with her?”

That was a good question. Jade had never exactly told her manager her reasons for seeking Tori in the first place. Jade wasn’t sure she had a reason and if she did, there was no way it was logical. She had simply begged and thrown tantrums until Sophia had broken and agreed to sign Tori. Except now Sophia was stubbornly playing by her own rules again and putting up more and more barriers.

She would have to elude that question and pray Sophia would be merciful. She had the bad habit of asking just the right questions to break down someone. She and Jay did and Jade could see why it worked.

“I told you. I want to come back to music with a new singer at the same time,” Jade said quickly, sitting up again properly.

Sophia made a grimace. She had never believed that excuse in the first place and she was believing it even less now. That was a lie Jade held onto.

“But there are a ton of singers who would benefit from a collaboration with you, and I don’t mean ones with following already or that I’m representing. Tori isn’t the only aspiring singer on this planet and it’s wrong to force her to stay where she’s uncomfortable,” the manager said.

Jade only shrugged. “I chose Tori, that’s all.”

Sophia frowned. Each answer was making the woman dig deeper. It was as though she was digging for the truth like a dog digging for a bone. How did it manage to be so uncomfortable for Jade?

Oh, because she had things to hide. Of course.

“But if Tori would choose to walk away on her own, you wouldn’t pursue that project, would you?” Sophia asked. “You’d move on to something else.”

Jade didn’t want to prove Sophia that she was right, mostly because she was just realizing that it was the case and she now had to come to terms with it herself. She put her sunglasses back on and crossed her arms. In a strange need to be bold and defiant, she said, “What makes you think that? Maybe I’ll just take my business elsewhere.”

“No, you won’t.”

The confidence coming from the manager annoyed Jade.

“What makes you think that?” The popstar asked.

“You had ten seconds to leave without any repercussions and you stayed.”

Sophia was too good. Being on the receiving end of her detective mind was perhaps one of the worst things to experience. Jade had endured this once to get signed. She was enduring it again. Jade suddenly felt awful for Tori, since she knew the aspiring singer had been on the receiving end of much, much worse.

“It’s an interesting move and behaviour from you,” Sophia briefly commented. “Besides, why do you want me to work with her?”

“What?”

“You want me to work with her. I mean, Tori doesn’t need to get signed to me to do a song with you. Both of you could’ve simply made a song on your own, released it independently, you could’ve promoted it on your own too and I’m certain you would’ve gotten very good numbers. Why do you want Tori to have a manager? A publicist? The same tools and resources you have as a prominent A-lister?”

Jade sighed. “It feels right to do.”

“Specifically, to Tori?”

Jade saw herself snap before she could stop herself. Words and guilt left her lips like a frantic war drum.

“I stole this from her, ten years ago. I took this away from her because I was angry, because I wanted payback and it seemed like the right thing to do.”

Obviously well informed, Sophia said, “The Platinum Music Awards, right?”

“Yeah. Tori had been chosen first, but she didn’t like that it involved acting like a different person, so she quit. Mason chose me after.”

Sophia frowned. She leaned forward, cheek in the palm of her hand, elbow on the table.

“But if you had refused, Mason would’ve given that opportunity to the next person. And if that person had said no, then it would’ve been to someone else, and that cycle would repeat until someone said yes. You understand that you didn’t do anything wrong, yes?”

Jade didn’t answer. That was the most logical conclusion to the whole thing, and instinctively, she knew that. What she didn’t know was why it wouldn’t stick in her brain. Why couldn’t she accept that this was the case? Sophia had told no lies. Just the truth anyone would accept. Why was Jade incapable of accepting this truth then?

Jade had objectively done nothing wrong. Maybe some people with different moral values would see it differently, as most people would’ve stood by Tori’s side in solidarity and turned down the offer. But Jade had never really been Tori’s friend by then and owed her no such thing.

History was repeating itself clearly, because even today, she had refused to stand by the Latina’s side and walk out on Sophia.

Sophia continued, “You’re not indebted to give Tori a career. Ten years ago, someone gave Tori a chance with conditions that she refused. Simple breach of contract. So, it went to you. That happens every day. All the time. If you get a promotion your colleague didn’t get, it’s not theft. It’s life being unfair and disgusting to all of us.”

Sophia then started chuckling again, just as someone arrived with her meal packaged in a plastic bag. The smell emanating from the containers kept Jade grounded to reality. Otherwise, she’d do something embarrassing and impulsive.

“Besides, trust me,” Sophia said. “It takes more than just singing for award shows to have a big career.”

Jade chose not to comment on that statement. It took so much more for so little.

“I just want to put all the chances on our side,” she said quickly.

Sophia wasn’t making any moves towards the door. She just stared at Jade, both hands on the bag, making the superstar very uncomfortable. Yes, more than she already was.

“You went to high school with Tori, yes?” The manager asked.

Jade nodded.

“How was it? Were you two friends?”

Jade shook her head. “I was a bitch to Tori until I had to leave. Her first week of school, I dropped coffee on her head after making her play the role of a dog for a class exercise.”

Jade was telling the story with a little smile, but she didn’t seem to find it funny. It was the bitter smile of guilt-ridden nostalgia. Remembering something ridiculous that caused pain to someone else. That’s what it was.

“I got her in trouble during a fake fighting scene. I made it seem like she had hit me in the face. I made life hell for Tori in high school, but it never felt enough, you know? It’s just … do you know how it feels to be ignored and pushed aside because of one person?”

“So you were jealous of Tori?”

“Christ, who wasn’t? Who wasn’t? It was like the moment Tori entered Hollywood Arts, it became all about her. Tori, Tori, Tori. If Tori auditioned for something, you were almost guaranteed to not have the role. People would rush to work with her, do music for her. And sometimes she’d fuck up. And when that happened, it was time for others to fix her mess. People would get pushed aside for her whims. I had a play supposed to happen, one Saturday. It was the only free Saturday for the rest of the school year. Well, my play never happened. Why? Because Tori wanted a prom! She went to a performing arts school! Our finals were performances during dances! Do you know how many parties we had in a semester? Why did she need a prom?”

Jade sighed. All those angry and bitter memories were making her shake.

Sophia asked the most obvious question.

“Then why are you doing this for Tori?”

Jade had the most obvious answer.

“I don’t know.”

Sophia sighed, but then smirked. She started standing up, tying the bag and grabbing her purse. She put her sunglasses on, looking at the door.

“Are you sure you’re doing this to help Tori?”

“What?”

Sophia shrugged. “Are you sure you’re doing all of this to help Tori? What if you have another objective in mind but you just won’t admit it?”

Jade groaned but made no movement to stand up.

“If that can reassure you, Tori isn’t going anywhere.” While that should’ve reassured Jade, the singer started to wonder if that statement was because Sophia had something horrible in mind for the poor Latina. If so, maybe Tori should run. Hell, Jade herself felt like she should run too. Her manager had something in mind for her too, especially since Jade had shown that she was at the woman’s mercy.

“Are you sure?” Jade asked, not believing one word coming from Sophia’s mouth.

“Don’t get me wrong, I would love for her to leave. It’d finally allow us to start working on your comeback, which I’m sick of pushing aside.”

Of course, she would. Jade felt Sophia run her fingers through her hair. That motherly touch was so comforting, fuck.

“Go home, get some rest and I’ll have a discussion with Tori,” Sophia said softly.

“She destroyed her phone; she can’t be contacted.”

Sophia headed for the door and waved her client goodbye.

“Buy her a new one then.”

*******

Jade watched Sophia leave the restaurant, yet she still made no move to stand up and leave herself. She needed to digest this meeting that had gone south. Sophia had come in with the upper hand and left with even more power than before. There was no way this was a healthy client-manager relationship but at this point, Jade didn’t care.

Jade’s phone chimed and she looked at the screen. She automatically got annoyed at what she saw. Sophia was deceptively good at her job and had obviously planned the direction this meeting would take. Jade officially couldn’t avoid her duties as an artist. She now had an event to attend for the upcoming weekend, thanks to Jay’s impeccable work. The singer quickly responded to her publicist, confirming she’d prepare for the event, then put her phone away. There was no use staying here as people were gradually starting to enter. Jade quickly left and got into her car. She quickly started it and drove onto the road. She drove slowly, thankful for once for the traffic because it allowed her to think while minimizing the chances of hitting something or someone.

Sophia was too good at digging into people and making them answer questions they didn’t want the answer to. There was Jade, looking for answers to her current actions. Why couldn’t she accept that she had not stolen anything from Tori back in high school? Why was she obsessed with working with her now, but so unwilling to put her own career on the line to do so? Was she even doing all of this to help her or for some other reason? If so, what was that goddamn reason, fuck?

All that thinking made her look out the window as traffic moved so slowly. Jade could see the mall near downtown, a gigantic place with everything one might need if she recalled. Clothing stores, little restaurants, banks … a phone shop.

Jade suddenly remembered Tori’s phone and the events that followed its untimely demise. It was now smashed to pieces, absolutely useless, and Tori couldn’t afford a new one. Her first reflex when Tori had pitifully cried its death was to promise another one. Then she remembered how, in her drunk mind, the young aspiring singer had managed to make one single demand in a moment of terrifying lucidity.

_“If you see me as a friend, don’t buy me another phone.”_

Jade looked into the changing traffic lights, hands gripping the stirring wheel as she started coming to a conclusion. Jade didn’t know the reason for her stubborn obsession with a collaboration with Tori. She even less could explain her intentions. But there was one thing that was certain.

She made a left and headed for the mall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Stay tuned for the next one! Be sure to leave kudos if you haven't already and leave a comment! I love reading you guys' impressions!


	10. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 1am and I'm babbling in the notes! 
> 
> Let me start by saying Happy New Year. We made to 2021 (gasp!), though not unscathed.
> 
> The first part of the chapter was hard to write using Tori's perspective, so I decided to make it Beck's. I think it's a lot better and sets the stage for when it's time to dive in his mind and his thoughts. And I'm excited about that. This chapter might feel like a filler but it has themes that are important for later on.
> 
> I'm happy to say that the next chapter is already written and just needs editing, so it might be up very soon.
> 
> Correcting and editing was very light on this chapter. Enjoy!

When Beck woke up, he didn’t expect Tori to still be asleep by his side. And one careful glance on his phone screen showed him that she was officially very late for her shift at the coffee shop. He predicted that even if she woke up now, she’d have to miss work completely. She was way too late to bother showing up. Besides, he thought it’d be better for her to take the morning to rest.

Beck got out of bed carefully, rearranging the blanket on Tori’s body to keep her covered and warm, and left their bedroom. If Tori was to miss work, he might as well lessen the possible consequences it could have on her in the future. He spent a good ten minutes looking for her phone, which he realized very early in his search that it was missing. Just completely missing. He looked in her bag, in the bedroom, in every room in their small apartment (which meant the bathroom, the kitchen and living room). He started looking in improbable places like the fridge, trying to think about what a wasted Tori could’ve done to it. After fifteen minutes of searching, he concluded that the phone was nowhere to be seen in the apartment. Even if he tried calling it, it made no sound.

Since he didn’t have his girlfriend’s cellphone, he had to be creative. Finding the phone number to Tori’s workplace wasn’t a challenge in the end. It took a simple internet search to have the number. He called the café on Tori’s behalf, making something up about her having a stomach flu and the illness still not going away. If Tori was very drunk, she’d be spending a lot of time in the bathroom anyway. It therefore was not a lie as much as it was an exaggerated truth, to put it lightly.

As Beck left a voicemail and hung up the phone, he looked at the last text messages he had received. He was both disappointed and relieved to see Melanie hadn’t texted him yet. Disappointed because she was his shot at a role somewhere, relieved because it meant Tori wouldn’t see her name or number and ask questions. Beck could lie if needed but lies involved a lot of work and effort to keep track of them. Besides, at some point, he doubted any message exchanged between himself and Melanie would be purely platonic and lying his way out of a nude received would be impossible. Tori wasn’t stupid.

Beck put his phone away, turning it off completely to avoid it buzzing or ringing. He looked around the silent kitchen, thinking hard, trying to understand what he was feeling. He was an actor, after all; he needed to be able to pinpoint feelings and emotions, portray them so the viewer could feel them too. How could he do so effectively if he didn’t understand himself?

Frustrated, the aspiring actor opened the fridge and grabbed a few eggs and some bacon. He turned on the oven and got to cooking. He wasn’t sure why he was doing it, it wasn’t a habit he had anymore. Juggling night shifts like he did to earn a paycheck had included a few sacrifices. For instance, breakfast in the morning and full nights of sleep.

Beck scrambled the eggs more violently than he should, dropping them on two plates he hastily grabbed. He dumped the bacon in the pan and listened to the sizzling. Why did that enlighten him and allowed him to figure out how he was feeling? How random. Like it mattered, because at least, now he knew how he felt. 

He was disgusted. His behaviour was making him sick. He realized his phone was making him anxious because he didn’t want Tori finding out what he had done. And that was what made him sicker. Why was he focused on Tori finding out that he had cheated and not the fact that he _had_ cheated? Wasn’t that the most important part? His infidelity after ten years of total and complete loyalty and faithfulness? Whether Tori found out or not was irrelevant. He had slept with a different woman and he knew the last thing he wanted to do was tell her. With the way their relationship was going, that would not only make Tori leave him but also, perhaps, make her quit music entirely and go back to Hollywood, tail between the legs, heartbroken. Beck Oliver couldn’t allow that.

The more Beck thought about Melanie, the more his stomach turned and twisted as he felt nauseous. What if Melanie had lied to him? What if she was not the daughter of a TV producer? He had sex with some random girl who _claimed_ she was. He didn’t know. She could be just a random woman who had wanted to bang some actor she saw on television, realizing that it wouldn’t be hard because said actor was a bartender now. Worse, she could be telling the truth, but her father’s company could be nothing useful to him or what he wanted. Beck’s priorities had to be fucked up if the girl lying was less bad than the girl’s father having a small, uninteresting company.

Like it mattered. All of that meant he had potentially slept with someone for no gain at the end, but knowing it would fuck up everything. What a waste. Absolute waste.

Breakfast on the table, Beck moved to the corner of the kitchen to throw away the now empty plastic detritus that had once contained bacon. He removed the lid to the trash can and saw something inside that wasn’t supposed to be there. Tori’s phone. He reached inside, quickly picked it up. His face scrunched up in disgust (because he had basically shoved his hand in trash) and he set the phone on the counter. Wiping it with a damp sponge, he frowned. The phone was… shattered. And he was not exaggerating. The phone’s screen was a wreck, like someone had grabbed a hammer and just hit it madly. Pieces of glass were falling and he was careful to remove them before they hurt him. The phone was unresponsive. Beck retrieved the SIM card and put it aside as he realized Tori would need a new phone soon. Great. Like their budget could cover a new phone in the first place.

He threw the phone away. It landed in the trash can with a resounding thud. What happened the night before? Why was the phone like this?

By the time the aspiring actor finished his classic plate of bacon and eggs, Tori was emerging from the bathroom. She looked like shit; she was pale, had bags under her eyes, her hair was a tangled mess. More importantly, her expression was horrible. Like she had been told her family had been murdered in an atrocious way. And it seemed like she was potentially irritable.

“Made you breakfast and coffee, it’s on the counter,” Beck said. He had to be careful not to ask the wrong question or make the wrong comment. He couldn’t anticipate Tori’s reaction.

The young woman thanked him and grabbed her plate. She sat down to eat it slowly, holding her head from time to time, no doubt due to a headache. Beck left to get her painkillers and returned with them. She took two with her coffee.

“What happened last night?” Beck asked. He couldn’t ignore that. He would not pry, but he wouldn’t ignore.

“I decided to get wasted,” Tori said quickly.

“Is that why your phone got trashed?”

Tori nodded again. For a moment, she seemed to brace herself for another question, but he had none.

“Called work for you. So, it’s fine if you miss your shift this morning.”

Obviously, the undertone was she had to go to work this afternoon. They were living paycheck to paycheck, each cent counted and was the difference between a payment towards a debt and watching interests add up.

Tori nodded in response. She was playing with her food, making a piece of bacon spin around on her plate. She seemed so sad, Beck wanted to know why. He didn’t want to dive too deep into whatever had sent Tori down a spiral to make her drink, but his curiosity was much stronger than anything else.

“Why did you get drunk?” He wouldn’t ask where or with whom, even though he wanted to make sure nothing had happened to her. He’d kill himself if he found out someone had taken advantage of her inebriated state to harm her.

“I got into a fight with my manager… I think I quit.”

Beck choked on his surprise. Quit music or quit working with her manager? Now that he thought about it, he had never seen Tori do anything about her music. No photo shoot, no recording sessions, no mention of her manager except a few months ago. At the very beginning, she had mentioned having to record six songs and the fees being covered. But now, nothing at all. However, the state she was in showing that something had clearly affected her. What was going on?

“What will you do now?” He was in a panic, though he didn’t show it. He didn’t know what she was quitting but he didn’t want to start a fight with her. She was pissed off enough to flat out leave.

“I’ll either find someone else to work with or…”

The silence after her sentence was heavy and suffocating them both. They both knew what it meant; they both knew what the alternative was. And contrary to Beck, Tori looked ready to pack a case and go home.

Thankfully, Tori stood up. She walked over to him and kissed him gently.

“Thank you for breakfast,” she said even though she had barely touched her plate. “I’m gonna shower.”

Beck watched, helpless, desperate, as Tori headed to their bathroom.

*******

“Turn left here,” Jay indicated her husband.

Her husband barely looked at her as he turned left where indicated. They weren’t going to a restaurant for nothing. No, Jay had something mind and a plan to put into action. His wife was a hardworking woman and sometimes, she had trouble separating work from family time. He had no issue doing just that, and he was doing it well. When the clock hit four pm, until nine am the next day, he was a daddy, not a worker. He was unavailable on weekends and very picky with his days off. His family life was everything to him, more than anyone could imagine. He’d drop everything to stay home with his children and his wife.

His wife was wobbly in that sense. She was often Jaylene the publicist more than she was Jaylene the mother or Jaylene the wife. She was good at both roles, that was undeniable. Her devotion to her children and to him was a reminder that he was blessed to have a woman like her. But he’d enjoy a little less publicist Jay from time to time.

“You know, if you wanted to take the kids out to eat, we could’ve gone to Chucky Cheese,” he said, looking into the rear-view mirror. He briefly saw his children in the backseat of their luxury SUV. Both his sons were playing video games while his toddler daughter was awake.

“I wanted to eat there instead. A night out as a family can’t always be fast food.”

“But it can be semi luxurious restaurant?” He disregarded Jay correcting him. So what the restaurant was casual? “How’s the kids’ menu?”

“I don’t think the boys will mind eating fries and chicken nuggets.”

“My point still stands: Chucky Cheese. Bonus, there’s a playground there.”

Her husband was onto her, though Jay was not trying to hide her intentions. She had stopped trying to do publicist work in secret. She hadn’t insisted on bringing their whole family out for nothing. She could’ve gone to the restaurant alone, yes, but she had duties as a mother too. Sophia had put her on the case of finding Tori, which she had done easily. She actually didn’t need to come here but she wanted to talk to Tori before Sophia got to her. If her friend and boss was even planning to do so. She suspected Sophia was over the moon at the idea of Tori leaving and that finding Tori was just to make sure the girl hadn’t hurt herself.

“Our kids should enjoy different types of restaurants,” Jay said. She was killing two birds with one stone: feed the children, talk to Tori.

Her husband ignored that too. “We could’ve stayed home, ordered Thai food for everyone.”

Jay turned to look at him. At a red light, he did the same. Making sure their kids were more interested in their games than their conversation, the parents glared one another.

“Let me do my job, please.” Which was the worst thing Jay could say.

“I always let you do your job. That’s why we’re on our way to a restaurant on a school night, to potentially harass someone who wants to be left alone.”

“Just stay in your lane and I’ll stay in mine,” Jay said dryly.

Her husband didn’t like that answer but he didn’t say anything else. Her work and how she did it was a subject off limits, and he had gone over the line. His sentiment didn’t change, neither did his attitude.

They reached the restaurant a few minutes later. The only thing Jay’s husband was grateful for in this restaurant was that the place wasn’t overly fancy. The family wearing casual clothes was just enough. He couldn’t imagine the hell it would’ve been to put his sons in fancy clothes, or the hell changing his daughter’s diapers while in an expensive suit would’ve been.

He parked and helped his sons out while his wife took the baby’s car seat. They entered the restaurant. It was quiet, the atmosphere very cozy.

The father put his sons on a mission; the mission of finding a table they liked to settle in. Both boys ran until warned to stop, and jogged to a booth near a window, which also happened to have an outlet near to charge their Nintendos. Damn, they were clever.

They sat down next to each other, soon joined by their parents. It took a few seconds before a waiter provided them with a baby seat for their daughter.

Jay focused on her daughter, ignoring the intense glares her husband was sending her way. He was much more family man than she was, and he obviously hated the fact that they were in a restaurant in the first place. He preferred being home in the kitchen, making dinner with his sons and bonding with them. His favourite part of the day was eating dinner with his whole family in their dining room. He’d throw hissy fits whenever his sons ate in front of the television. Jay couldn’t care less, because she’d be eating in front of her laptop with the baby on her lap anyway.

“So, what’s your plan this time?”

The condescendence emanating from her husband annoyed her. She was even more annoyed when he decided to focus on the baby, taking away from her any shield from his petty prodding.

“I’m not here for work exactly. I just need to talk to a client.”

“How is talking to a client not work?”

Jay rolled her eyes, instinctively rubbing her nearest son’s back as he played his game. She was perhaps not the most traditional mother, but she was caring and comforting. And all the care and comfort she had would extend to most people she knew, not just her beautiful babies and her adorable husband who was being a petty bitch.

“I just need to talk to her. Things have been hard on her, and I think she needs someone to talk to.”

She was so happy to see Tori heading their way, because it’d be a break from her husband’s interrogation.

*******

Tori had almost missed the door to the restaurant opening. She had been deep in thought and it was destabilizing to be brought back to reality like that. The whole time, as she had been wiping the wooden table, she had thought about her life. What in the hell was she doing, chasing a dream while working as a waitress? She didn’t know what to do now that she had quit working with Sophia; she didn’t know if she’d keep pursuing music at all. The only thing she knew was that being a waitress and a barista had to stop. She couldn’t keep doing this her entire life as if there was nothing wrong with it, as if she had no other alternative. She knew what to expect with Beck and she was already looking for alternatives in case she decided to pull the plug on her career.

Beck. Her lovely boyfriend blinded by desperation. He could barely handle the idea of her moving on and Tori started to wonder why. Her stopping didn’t mean she would leave him, so why did it seem like it’s what he thought. She could come up with an alternative that would allow him to pursue his dream, no?

She looked up at who had entered the restaurant, and she saw a young Afro-American family, two young parents and three children. She hoped the children weren’t going to run around the restaurant unsupervised by their parents (as was common in Los Angeles). The way they were holding their video game consoles reassured her. The most they’d do was play in silence and she preferred that.

Knowing she was the one who’d have to serve them, she quickly put away her cleaning equipment and grabbed her pad and pen. As she walked to the table, she recognized the mother; it was Jaylene of all people. A chill ran down her spine and her heartbeat’s speed doubled. Jay being here was not a coincidence and it suddenly terrified Tori. How much did Sophia and Jay know about her life if finding her workplace was that easy? Tori had never mentioned her jobs, and restaurants in LA were super common.

Tori still forced herself to smile. She introduced herself to Jay and her family. Tori suddenly felt envious. The family was adorable, a poster of the nuclear family she dreamed of having one day. And seeing two accomplished parents (no way a woman like Jaylene would settle for any man, let’s be clear) with their two perfect sons and their cutest daughter reminded Tori that if she wanted that, she needed to get her shit together quickly.

She introduced herself, gave everyone a menu and promised to return in a few minutes to take their order. As she walked away to get water, she could hear the conversation focused on what the boys had done during their day, before the parents joined in. That was cute. It was nice to see Jay in a setting that wasn’t all work. Tori had never pictured Jay as a mother, and she wondered why before now. Why was it strange for Jay to both be a mom and a career woman? They were not mutually exclusive things. That made her wonder about Sophia. Was it the case with her? Did Sophia have kids? Or was she just the devil, living alone in a multimillion-dollar home eating rats and stray dogs?

More importantly, was Tori supposed to act like she didn’t know Jay? Was she supposed to acknowledge her? She didn’t have the etiquette on how to serve your publicist in the restaurant you’re working at. As she fetched glasses and a pitcher of water, she decided to stop focusing on them. Her envy was growing bigger and bigger, and with it fear and sadness came along. She wanted that aspect of life, as much as she had wanted Jade’s. Now she feared that she would never get that, and that thought was depressing.

Tori returned to their table with water. She filled a glass for everyone except the baby.

“Did you have time to decide on what you wanted?” She asked in a cheerful tone that in no way reflected what she was feeling.

“Come on, boys, what do you want to eat?” The father asked.

One boy, maybe the comedian of the household, said very proudly, “I’ll take the steak combo; the steak cooked rare, and hold the vegetables.”

The father chuckled and said, “He’ll take the steak cooked well done, with all the vegetables that comes with it. Be generous with the vegetables.”

The boy protested to his dad, who glared him and whispered to him. Tori noticed an accent from Jay’s husband she couldn’t pinpoint exactly.

Tori took everyone else’s order quickly, hoping her hands weren’t trembling from the anxiety she felt. Once she had confirmed the orders were the right ones, she was quick to leave to get them to the kitchen. She needed to distance herself from that family, the idolization of a dream that would soon disappear if she didn’t get her shit together.

*******

Tori felt so strangely relieved when, two hours later, she saw the patriarch of the family raise his hand to get the check. She headed towards their table with the receipt, handing them a machine to take their payment. As she watched the man pay, Jay looked at her, holding her daughter.

“Can you show me to the bathroom, please?”

Tori nodded and led her ex-publicist to the bathroom in the back. She let Jay in and watched as the mom headed for the changing table, strapping her child in safely before she tied her hair to keep it out of her face. Jay then set on the counter near her a blue and grey bag and zipped it open. Tori was glued to the floor, just watching, waiting for something. Anything.

“Her name is Jayda,” Jay said as she grabbed what she needed from the bag. At the mention of her name, the baby stopped looking around and looked at her mom instead. That made Tori smile.

“Right. Um, hey, Jayda,” Tori awkwardly said.

That should’ve been Tori’s cue to leave quickly. But instead, she stayed at the door and watched Jay change her daughter’s diaper. Why were her feet glued to the floor? Why did she need some form of closure from Jay?

“Did you think I was gonna embarrass you?” Jay asked.

“No, I thought you’d prefer if we… yeah” Tori didn’t have to finish her sentence. Jay turned to look at her.

“Ask me anything, I have a little bit of time.”

Tori had a hundred questions that needed answers. She wasn’t sure which one to ask first. Wait, yes, she did.

“How did you know I worked here?”

“It’s very hard to hide from me in this city.” After a giggle, the publicist added. “I called someone who gave me a restaurant name and then I used Google to get the address.”

Still creeped out by the fact that it had taken Jay a phone call and a search engine to find her, Tori shook her head. She needed to ask something to change the atmosphere. Jay was already washing her hands after putting everything away and Tori couldn’t let her leave yet.

“So, who else was with you for dinner?”

“My husband, Olivier. My oldest son, Isaiah, and my youngest son Jerome. You provided a great service by the way.”

“Thanks.”

Tori stared at Jay, and Jay stared at her, her child in her arms. Tori was the first one to break the silence, realizing she had nothing to lose except someone who could’ve been a friend and a great support. Feeling like it would be the last time she’d ever see Jay again, Tori decided she might as well be honest. It’s not like Jay would tell anyone, and even if she did, it’d change nothing.

“I think I’m not meant for music.” Tori took a deep breath. “I’m gonna do something else with my life, it’s better that way.”

Jay nodded once. “I understand. It took ten years of trying for you to figure this out but, better late than sorry.”

Jay hugged her gently. Yeah. Ten years. Ten years of struggling, of barely scrapping by, only to give up now. Tori saw how pathetic it was, but she was tired. And now she was sobbing.

“I tried,” Tori lamented between sobs.

“I know you did.” Jay let go of her. “But in case you ever change your mind, go quit in person, just so you can settle things with Sophia.”

They parted ways after one last hug. Tori had never felt this pathetic in her life. She turned to look at herself in the mirror, to quickly wipe her tears, but when she saw her face, she could do nothing else but cry harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it! Leave a kudos on this fic if you haven't already and keep commenting. Your comments bring me so much joy, haha!


	11. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea how to start this note, hahaha. Anyway here's the tenth chapter. I see it as the end of the first arc/part/season of this story, and the next one will be the beginning of the second arc/part/season. At least, that's how it works in my head.
> 
> The second half of the chapter took a whole different direction than I thought it would but I think there's some themes that will be fun to explore for the next chapters. I'm not entirely satisfied with the second half of the story but Jori is always fun.
> 
> I'm not sure how the plot will flow for the second arc. I will not rush it, but there's so much goodies I want to throw in there and I want to work on Beck a little. But enough about me, enjoy this chapter (editing will not be perfect, I was excited to upload this)!

Tori’s anxiety was becoming more and more intense as she headed towards Sophia’s office. It was just after lunch, so there were no ways Sophia was eating. Tori had freed her afternoon just to talk with her. Jay had made her realize something the night before that she didn’t like. She had made it look as if Tori was a quitter, a wimp. Jay hadn’t meant it at all. Tori was aware Jay had simply accepted and supported her decision to quit, then given her advice like any good person would, but something still resonated with her.

Ten years. Tori had grasped and chased and prayed and dreamed for this dream only to now give up. It was like arriving at the gate of the castle, having your hand on the handle, and turning away.

Perhaps more painful was the fact that Tori didn’t care anymore. Yep, she was a quitter. Oh well.

Jay had also mentioned quitting to Sophia face to face and even though she dreaded the next ten minutes, Tori knew instinctively that needed to say one last thing to her worst torturer. She needed to look Sophia in the eye and say exactly what she needed to say. If she was to be blacklisted from the industry, if she was to live the lacklustre life she dreaded, then at least she would start by telling the Devil to go fuck herself. It had taken many days of building up the courage and today was the day.

Tori managed to get past Josh the receptionist when he temporarily left the desk to go to the room behind him. Something didn’t feel right about that but it didn’t matter. Tori headed to the elevator.

She burst into Sophia’s office the moment the elevator doors opened. The manager was looking at her computer screen, occasionally typing and using her mouse to look for something. She briefly turned her head to look at Tori before focusing on her computer again.

“Why did Josh let you in?” She asked coldly. “You don’t work with me anymore, remember?”

Sophia briefly typed something, then smirked. “You quit, remember?”

Tori nodded. How and when was still blurry in her head but she knew the important thing was that, yes, she had quit.

“I know,” she said, walking towards Sophia, trembling.

“Do you have a gun on you? Did you come to shoot me?”

If they didn’t live in America, this would’ve been a strange question to ask. But Tori quickly assured her ex-manager that she simply needed to settle things with her, not send her to her grave. Sophia still looked uninterested.

“I’ll start by saying I’m sorry for my behaviour when I was drunk.”

Sophia nodded, focused on her screen. 

“It’s fine,” she said.

“I owe you respect even if you never had any for me. So, I’m telling you nicely: I quit.”

Tori only felt empowered briefly, because it seemed as though Sophia had listened to only one half of what she had said. Whatever it was that Sophia was doing, it was more important than Tori.

Tori should leave it at that. She had said what she had needed to say. But no. She needed Sophia to acknowledge her at least once. Just _this_ once.

“I quit.”

Sophia grabbed a pen and paper and wrote down a phone number.

Tori stood and yelled. “I quit!”

“I don’t care.”

The young Latina froze. Sophia was looking up at her, mid writing, with her cold blue eyes. Even now she had the upper hand, and this was torture. Before she could control herself, Tori grabbed the computer and threw it on the floor. The screen went black and she saw it crack. Sophia would definitely call security and could sue her out of millions she did not have, but right now it didn’t matter. She was angry. She was angry that she was being ignored, she was angry that she was quitting, she was angry that she had been given a shortcut to her dream and she was abandoning because she couldn’t stand up to _one_ woman, _one_ person. She was angry that after ten years of preparing for this metaphoric fight, she was giving up before even entering the ring.

Tori was sick of being weak and treated as such. She was sick to realize that even to someone as sweet and supporting as Jay, she was not worth fighting for.

“You pompous bitch. Look at me when I’m talking to you,” she yelled.

Sophia pinched the bridge of her nose, as if she had a headache. “Or you’ll hit me? Oh, maybe you want to throw my mouse on the floor?”

Ignoring the mocking, Tori said, “I quit.”

“And I don’t care, princess.”

“Do not call me princess.”

“Should I call you a brat instead? You’re throwing a tantrum in my office because I won’t look at you.”

“Yes, fuck! I want you to look at me! I want you to respect me, damn it!”

Tori kept yelling, hitting the desk with her fists. She gasped for air, her vision blurring from the tears forming.

“Fuck, just look at me! Just look at me, fuck!”

Panting, Tori barely noticed Sophia standing up and walking towards her. The manager crossed her arms.

“Fine. Give me your ground-breaking news.”

Tori looked at Sophia. Now. It was now or never. She had the attention she had literally destroyed for.

But instead she babbled something incoherently like a child and starting bawling pathetically.

“I can’t do this.”

Sophia watched a grown woman dehydrate herself by crying pathetically in her office. Tori fell on her knees, now crying on the clean carpet.

Tori didn’t expect the woman looking at her to kneel and gently pat her back while wiping her tears with the back of her hand, before grabbing tissues to dry her face. After a few seconds, when the sobs became less intense, Sophia softly asked. “What do you want?”

“I want you to die.”

The head of Managold Management chuckled. “My wife wanted that too when she was giving birth to our twins. Tell me, what do you want?”

That was the thing that was killing Tori. Tori knew what she wanted instinctively, what she had been fighting for for way too long. But she didn’t feel capable of reaching it. She didn’t feel deserving of it, even less saying it.

“I love to sing. I love performing,” she lamented instead, shoulders wracking from her quiet sobs.

“Yes, yes, so does my cousin and twelve-year-olds on YouTube. Tori Vega, what do you want?”

Facing the question again, realizing she didn’t have an answer, Tori cried harder. It was a horribly pathetic image that Sophia was relieved to finally see. She hadn’t meant to push Tori to the edge of her sanity, and she had even less meant to make her cry like so (again she was certain), but seeing this told her she was doing exactly what was necessary. Tori needed to push herself out of her comfort zone and that started by being honest with _herself_. Even if she couldn’t put in words what she wanted, as long as she felt it, it was a step forward in the right position.

Sophia gave Tori some time alone to recover as she picked up her computer from the floor and fetched a water bottle. By the time she was done doing those two things, Tori had settled against her desk and was sitting, legs stretched out in front of her, staring at the large windows in front of them.

Sophia handed her the water bottle then sat down next to her. Now the only thing she hoped was that this event wouldn’t make things awkward between them. She wasn’t the type of manager to shame a client for being so open emotionally. On the contrary, she preferred a client that cried in her office than a client that bottled everything up until it was too late.

Tori emptied the entire bottle in less than ten seconds. She kept staring at the windows, looking exhausted and dead inside. Good.

“I know what you want,” Sophia said in a low voice.

“I quit.”

The manager smiled.

“And you know what you want.”

“I quit.”

“I believe you should get it.”

Tori said nothing this time. She looked down at the carpet, quickly scratching her cheek.

“What do you dream of every day?” Sophia continued, softer than Tori had ever seen her before. “I won’t judge you. Judging you doesn’t pay my bills. You can say it all. You want money? Me too, I have a mortgage to pay. You want the fame, people to scream your name and worship you? You’re not the only one.”

“I shouldn’t be here today,” Tori whispered. “I was the one who won the contest. I was the one who was supposed to sing for the Platinum Music Awards ten years ago.”

“Do you want revenge on Jade for stealing that?”

“No.” Tori managed to blurt out. She didn’t hold resentment towards Jade. Jade had done what many people would’ve done: take an opportunity. And while she had spent the last decade holding a grudge, she couldn’t anymore.

“Then what do you want?”

“There are no words to say what I want. I regret. That’s all. It should’ve been me. It would’ve been me.”

“You speak like what you want is now unattainable. It should’ve. It would’ve… I don’t like that.” Sophia chuckled. “Even if you had sung for the Platinum Music Awards, your career would’ve been short if you kept acting the way you act with me.”

Sophia made herself more comfortable on the floor, looking at the large windows in her office.

“Do you know why Mason always made his clients act a certain way when he would sign them?” Sophia asked Tori.

“Publicity?”

“ _Substance_. Remember when I said singers are a dime a dozen in Los Angeles? I meant it. Cute girls like you, coming from all the families, all the places. So many it’s like counting sand. Getting people interested in the future breakout star, that’s so easy. Getting people interested in an artist is harder.”

“You’re saying I never would’ve made it? Because I was…”

“Boring. Yes. When Jade sang for the award show, the entire country was fixated on the new star that she was. But that was just for the week of the event. The next week, we were focused on a goddamn cat. Then Jade was back in the news. Apparently, she had threatened Mason with scissors in a public restaurant. Imagine that: a talented 16-year-old girl who is so fierce, even her own manager bows to her. This was not only authentic, but interesting and relatable.”

Tori had to disagree. “There is nothing relatable about threatening your manager.”

“It is when so many people allow themselves to be shit on by someone above them. How many people dream of telling their boss to go fuck themselves? How many teenagers dream of telling their parents to go to hell? How many people wish they could do what you just did? It’s relatable.”

Tori had to agree. 

“Everything she did showed us an iconic teenager who still did everything she wanted. She stayed in public school. She went to college while touring and working on an album. She was this iconic and fearless young woman who said what she thought, did what she did, and that got people interested. And even as the years passed and we started seeing different faces of her, we saw someone authentic.”

“I don’t believe in faking a personality and that’s all you ever did with me the moment you entered my office. You faked Tori Vega and that will never get you anywhere.”

Sophia smiled.

“If you can’t tell me what you want, I’m gonna tell you what I want. I want the Tori Vega who broke my computer.”

“Right. Sorry about that.”

“Yeah. I fucking loved it. I want the Tori Vega who’s crying right now and finally being honest with herself. I want the Tori Vega who accepts that she isn’t superior or perfect and that it’s okay to be flawed, to be lost, to be desperate.”

Sophia had one hand on her thigh, squeezing it not like a creep in a bar, but like a reassuring mother, a comforting grandmother. Tori saw in her eyes so much empathy that she saw Sophia’s point. And she painfully realized what the woman had been doing all along. The cunning and patience this whole thing must’ve taken shook Tori to the core. It also somehow reassured her; Sophia was not only good at her job but passionate about it. If something took years to yield the proper results, she’d wait five years.

Sophia continued. “I know what you want. You don’t have to say it. But you’re the only person who can make it happen. If you want to be a singer, you can take the twelve songs you have, release them as an album and work around that.”

“Why didn’t you do that a long time ago?”

That made Sophia laugh. “I didn’t mean with me. I don’t represent singers, I represent artists. Any manager could get you a few songwriting deals here and there, just to get the royalties flowing, and you’ll be another singer with a few hits, a cute face but in the end, tepid and bland. And you’ll be forgotten in a decade, maybe less than that.”

“But if you want to be an artist and become a fucking legend, if you want to have an impact…” Sophia inched closer, so close to Tori the brunette could see how vivid the blue of her eyes was. “You’re gonna have to grow a goddamn pair. You’re gonna have to open up, be vulnerable and face the fire. You’re gonna have to show people that you can grow, that you have different faces, that you are not as perfect as you’re trying to be.”

Sophia moved back. “So, what do you want to be?”

*******

Silence was always heavy at the worst times. It was always when one needed distraction, preferably very loud distraction, that silence decided to take all the space available and just be unbearable. The only good thing right now was that she wasn’t crying. She had spent all the tears in her body, all her energy. She was tired of crying and past that point. Bawling like a child solved nothing and changed nothing; her dreams of being a singer were over.

Tori wished her boyfriend was home right now, and not working the night shift at the bar. She didn’t want to be alone with her thoughts. Had he been with her, they could’ve talked, watched television. He would’ve distracted her one way or another, she would’ve forced herself to act like everything was fine while she came up with a lie to tell him, something to explain why she was quitting and what alternative there was. His absence forced her to think and reflect on the past few months. She had been insulted, degraded, pitied, mistreated and all she had to show for it was nothing. Not a song, not an appearance on television, not one single thing.

Something felt off. Something made no sense. As Tori sat on the couch, she tried to imagine herself waking up early every morning, going to some sort of office job or whatever job involved a schedule. She tried to imagine herself teaching her craft, teaching other hopeful people who dreamed of what she had once dreamed of. She wondered if she’d despise those who’d succeed, if she’d hate herself and her job but keep working to keep a roof over her head. Frankly, she didn’t want to stay in the state at all. If she was to live a potentially more common life, she’d do it where most things were affordable.

Tori sat up and faced the window in her living room. Leaving LA … Leaving California altogether. With or without Beck? She suddenly found herself wishing Beck had been the one to be in her situation. His stubbornness would’ve made him stay and fight. By now, he’d be playing in television or in a movie. He’d have his name everywhere.

One thing Tori feared was what he’d do depending on her decision. She wanted to move forward and as much as she loved him, she wasn’t going to stop herself from acquiring better things just because he wanted to be an actor.

Tori wished he was home. She wished she had the strength to tell him how she felt, and she wished he hadn’t grown so obsessed so he could help her find a solution that would fit them both.

She sat on the couch depressed, exhausted, unmotivated. She wanted to just die on the spot. She’d have to call her mother for help. Worse than that, she’d have to talk to Beck and she dreaded the discussion. She knew she wasn’t strong enough to face him alone. He’d find a way to make her stay and continue and she couldn’t do it.

Maybe going to bed was better than sitting on the couch in the dark. A night of sleep would provide more answers than an all-nighter. Just as she got off the couch, she heard something. A car horn. Not once or twice. Several times. It was like someone was shamelessly and obnoxiously choosing to hit the horn of their car knowing full well it was nearing midnight.

Annoyed, feeling brash and wanting to insult someone, Tori headed to the window of the living room. The cause of the disturbance was surprising and unexpected: Jade’s car was parked in front of her apartment. Just casually sitting there and making noise. The neighbourhood’s cars were affordable brands, not luxury SUVs like this one. This was suspicious, intriguing and Tori was noticing a few people looking out their windows to see the cause of the disturbance.

Feeling embarrassed but not sure why, she quickly walked out of her apartment, in nothing but her pajama pants and her t-shirt. She knocked on the window of the passenger seat, waved at Jade. She was angry to see Jade, but also happy. Happy because the singer hadn’t forgotten about her, angry because it was nearing midnight and she was being… Jade. Angry because now she had to face Jade and the Latina wasn’t sure just how much she knew about the recent events. Would Jade be pissed that Tori had decided to follow a different life path?

Jade turned around, saw Tori, and unlocked the door. Tori took a seat next to her and sent her death glares. Maybe because she was causing a ruckus at midnight in a residential street. Jade would’ve wished she didn’t; truthfully, she wanted to be in bed herself. But she needed to talk to Tori.

“Why are you here?” Tori asked, skipping the usual greetings.

Jade was relieved Tori seemed annoyed more than anything. She handed the young woman her phone, the screen providing illuminating light in the car. No one from the outside would be able to see it due to the tinted windows. Jade was contemplating driving off, hoping to get less attention, but she figured most people had gone back to bed or whatever they had been doing.

“What?” Tori asked, the phone in hand.

Jade leaned over, opened an audio file and pressed play.

“Listen.”

They spent sixty seconds in silence. That was how long the audio file titled “Demo 1” lasted. Tori felt chills in her body, as if her stomach was sinking. From the sound of it, the song would be great, and Jade’s vocal abilities were amazing, even in this acoustic demo, but that meant…

“The day after you visited my home, I met with Sophia. I gave her this. You had written it.”

Jade handed Tori a letter. Wow, Tori had written a formal letter while drunk. Impressive.

“I tried to make a case for you, I tried to convince Sophia, I guess, to be nicer to you and stuff.”

Jade wasn’t going to mention how this had failed and sent her into reflection for an entire week.

“So, what happened?” Tori looked into Jade’s eyes.

Instead of telling Tori what happened, the popstar shrugged. She was too proud to tell Tori she had been eaten whole by Sophia.

“That’s my next single. I’m not sure when it’s coming but it’s coming rather soon. Sophia and Jay are working on the marketing already.”

Jade sighed, grip tightening on her steering wheel. She had been holding it the whole time, as if it was a clutch to give her strength.

“I look forward to hearing it—”

“I’m sorry, Tori.”

Frowning, the young Latina looked away. That was unexpected. And confusing. What was Jade apologizing for? Tori should be the one apologizing. Jade had given her, on a fucking silver platter, the path to an absolute dream, and today, she had quit. It was the equivalent of being given the next winning numbers to the lottery, and choosing not to buy a ticket.

“I put you in a very bad situation. I stood by and watched someone make you go through hell and when it was time to defend you… I couldn’t even defend you.”

Watching Jade apologize like that was wrong. Tori didn’t want her to live with guilt she shouldn’t have. It had never been her job to defend Tori, to make a case for her, or anything. From the get-go, Tori should’ve realized it wouldn’t have been easy. This, what she had wanted, took work and effort.

“Why did you want to work with me? Honestly?” Tori found herself asking.

Jade sighed again. She looked out her window but ultimately didn’t answer the question.

“I still want to do a song with you,” she said instead.

Tori wasn’t going to let Jade get away with that. It was great that Jade still wanted to sing a duet with her, but it wasn’t what she needed.

“That’s not what I asked.”

The raven-haired young woman got annoyed. “Who cares why I want to work with you? Doesn’t seem like it’ll happen, no?”

“ _I_ care. I want to know.”

“I didn’t want to sing a song with you. I mean, I do, but it wasn’t the main goal.” Jade looked at Tori. “I felt like I owed you.”

“But you realize now that it’s not the case.”

The singer shrugged.

“I used to resent you, but I don’t anymore.”

Jade smiled. She finally looked at Tori, looking amused. She wasn’t surprised that Tori had once resented her. She probably would’ve too, in the same circumstances.

“I don’t blame you.” Jade said between chuckles.

“I mean, it was shitty for you to say yes to Mason in my face.”

“The look on your face made it worth it.”

“But… I don’t blame you. You did nothing wrong and looking at me right now, I wouldn’t have been able to handle a career like you did.”

Jade suddenly reached in the back of the car and handed Tori a gift bag. Tori looked inside the bag. A phone. A brand-new phone.

“Wait … why are you giving me a phone?” How did Jade know she needed one?

“You broke yours the night you got drunk in my home. I felt responsible… See it as me being sincere when I say I’m sorry.”

Jade didn’t mention Tori clearly asking her not to buy her a phone if they were friends. She braced for the possible anger that would ruin the moment. To her surprise, the Latina reached for her and hugged her tightly.

“Oh my God, thank you! Thank you!”

“You’re welcome. What are you going to do now?”

“Either find a different job or go back to school… I’m thinking about it.” Tori smiled. “At least I made a new friend. When can we hang out?”

Jade lost her smile, and as soon as she did, Tori lost hers.

“What?”

“I don’t know when I’ll be able to see you again. I can text and call you but…”

That somehow made Tori angry. Before she even let Jade explain herself, she exclaimed, “What? Because you think you owe me nothing now you’ll stop talking to me?”

Hand on the door handle, she was ready to leave when Jade caught her arm.

“That’s not what I meant. All I meant was I’m going to be busy for the next months and you will too. Who knows when we’ll be able to see each other.”

They sat in silence, looking at each other, Tori holding the phone.

“Sorry. You’re right.”

“It’s fine. Really.”

“I have to go; I’m meeting Sophia tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah, it’s late for me too. Thank you for the phone.”

Jade quickly scribbled her phone number on the box as Tori requested it. Wishing each other good night, Tori exited the car and went inside her apartment. Once she was safely inside, she watched Jade drive off.

Sitting down on the couch, she started setting up her new phone. The device was the newest version of the brand, and had barely hit the stores. It was going to be difficult to explain to Beck how she had gotten it, especially when she knew its price at the moment was over a thousand dollars. As she turned on the new phone, she realized something felt off. The conversation with Jade had made her feel better, that was for sure, but now something felt wrong. Something made no sense.

Tori put a case on the phone and started recovering her data. As she set it down and waited…

Why was she quitting anyway? Why was she giving up in the first place? It wasn’t like anything major had happened. Actually, nothing had happened. Nothing at all. She had been criticized a little by Sophia and that was it.

The aspiring singer buried her face in her hands, panting heavily. She had done something very stupid and she had no idea how to fix it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This concludes part 1, season 1, arc 1 (I don't know lol) of the story. I hope you liked it. Leave kudos if you haven't already, leave a comment because I just love them and I'll see you soon!


	12. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're back, but with a slow and short chapter to set the tone. Writing was hard, I had a rough couple of weeks and I know it's not over yet. It seems as though university is going to be rough this semester. For the story, I'm planning to really take my time for the next couple of chapters, dive into the past, dive into the life of the other characters too.
> 
> That being said, read on!
> 
> Note: Victoria Justice is releasing another song and I'm so happy haha  
> Note again: I did some quick editing and correcting.

“I think that glass is clean. It’s literally sparkling.”

Beck was shaken out of his trance by Melanie’s voice. He looked down at the rag and the glass he had been cleaning while deep in thoughts. Light was reflecting from the glass; he had cleaned it so well it was almost blinding when light would reflect on it. Embarrassed, he nervously laughed as he set the glass down with the others and grabbed a new one to polish.

The bar was quiet today. Quiet for that type of bar, at least. It was as crowded as usual, but most people here were usuals and a few new faces partying, as if they had nothing else better to do. Most people were often just asking for refills and dropping various bills without paying attention. It was the perfect environment to make him fall into thoughts. He was used to the loud, obnoxious and dizzying environment he worked in. He had gotten good at blacking it all out, at just focusing on whatever would go through his head, whether it was worries, daydreaming or reciting lines for an upcoming audition.

“Is everything okay? You seem different.”

Beck looked at Melanie. She sat at the bar, still very slowly sipping her first and only drink of the night. She had developed the habit of meeting him at some point during his shifts, often at the end so he could go home with her. Her almost constant presence when he was working had made him give her the schedule of his shifts so she wasn’t sitting at the bar alone for nothing when he wasn’t working.

Yes, yes. Anyone with a functioning brain hearing something like that would be screaming at him. Why, as someone in a relationship, was he giving his schedules to his side chick? Beck had screamed at himself when he had texted Melanie his hours the first time.

He had a very valid reason: simply put, Melanie checked out. It had taken a few nights with her to confirm that yes, her father had a production company. It wasn’t gigantic but they had recently been building a reputation for making very good shows for streaming platforms and their older shows were getting put on the said various streaming services. Many actors now had a career just by working with them and being seen in one of their shows.

Melanie had the resources he needed to finally get his break. Bonus point, she had the drive to prove herself to her father. Beck didn’t feel good using her just to be on television, or rather, on someone’s phone, but he needed that. He was simply desperate, and he knew a break would do absolute miracles in both his life and his relationship. This relationship wasn’t permanent: once he got his role, he’d break it off with Melanie and resume life as usual.

Did that make him a pig? Yes. But he was a pig who needed to play dirty. He wasn’t doing this just for himself; he was doing it for Tori too. Lately, she was losing it. No, she _had_ lost it, just a month ago. For a week, she had cried and whined about how her chance at a career was over, but she had never explained him why. She had quit all of her jobs out of nowhere and now she was doing nothing. Literally. The few times she was home, she’d lay in bed or on the couch depressed. Any attempt at talking to her resulted in fights that made her disappear for a few days.

Beck threaded very carefully at home, leaving Tori alone as much as possible, asking no questions, giving her space. He was terrified a deeper problem had caused her behaviour and he felt powerless at the fact that he didn’t have the means to provide her with professional help before it derailed. He had already doubled the shifts to make up for what Tori wasn’t anymore financially. He himself was exhausted, both physically and mentally. Looking at Melanie, he was glad to have her near him in a way. She was the only support he had at this point, the only person who was there for him, who expected nothing from him.

Melanie needed to know nothing about his personal life, however. Especially nothing relating to Tori.

Beck sheepishly shrugged as a response to her question.

“Just thinking about things,” he said, which was true anyway.

Melanie nodded. Stirring the melting ice in her drink with a straw, she asked.

“Why don’t you have an agent?”

That was a great question. Beck had never gotten an agent, even when playing in the series _The King_. It had never seemed important, especially since he was doing everything on his own perfectly. At the point he was now, Beck didn’t want to sign to an agent and give himself false hope. Besides, what would an agent do if not find him auditions and negotiate his rates? Why get an agent if he could do that on his own?

“Don’t you think you need one?” Melanie asked.

While Melanie was the industry expert and he enjoyed her advice and knowledge, he would disagree on this one. Beck didn’t see the point in having a middleman for his career, at least at this point. When he got bigger, he would definitely hire a team of people to handle him and his affairs. Right now, he’d take care of everything alone.

“No. Not right now.”

Melanie seemed displeased by this answer. She leaned forward, elbows on the table, drink pushed aside.

“I don’t understand why you’re like that.”

Beck frowned. Putting his rag and the glass aside, he leaned on the counter. He was silent, thinking. What did she see in him that he didn’t? In his mind, his values were understandable, valid.

“Like what?” He asked.

“So prideful and egotistical.”

Melanie thought he was prideful and egotistical? Just because he didn’t want an agent? That was rich.

“I’m neither of these things,” he retorted.

“Yes, you are. You won’t get an agent, you won’t play in ads or web series, you didn’t even want the job I offered you.”

There we go again. Beck had his reasons, and these reasons were valid to him. He didn’t see the point in getting an agent right now. He didn’t want to play in ads, especially after playing in a television series and he was an artist before anything else. His focus wasn’t on business or marketing and getting an office job just to “make contacts” was stupid in his opinion. He wished Melanie saw what he saw and would drop it.

“I just want to do things differently.”

“Getting an agent won’t stop you from doing things differently.”

Yes, it would. It meant working by the rules of someone else, bending over for whatever that person wanted. Since he was still a newcomer, he was vulnerable to the worst things possible. He wouldn’t deal with any of that. He wanted to make it as an independent actor and getting an agent wasn’t making it as an independent actor.

The aspiring actor barely bit his tongue and said, harsher than intended, “I feel like it would.”

Melanie made a face, then stopped meeting his eyes. She started looking away, never meeting his gaze. They were in silence for five minutes before she pushed her drink aside and stood up.

“I have to go, I’m sorry,” she said quietly.

It was getting late for her to just be at a bar for no reason, especially alone. Beck’s shift wasn’t over, which meant he wouldn’t spend the night at her house today. Had he said something from wrong? What a stupid question; of course, he had. With the way Melanie was rushing to put her jacket on and grab her car keys, he had definitely hurt her feelings and made her run.

Beck took the drink. Melanie had drunk barely one quarter of it. She looked at Beck.

“You can’t always have things the way you want them.”

With that she left, and he watched her slip between dancing people to get to the door. Sighing, Beck returned to polishing glasses. He felt helpless, he felt desperate and for the first time, he felt like he was pursuing an empty dream.

*******

Sophia turned off the water faucet when she finished brushing her teeth. She closed her eyes for a moment. Her house was silent, which was reassuring at this time of night. It meant their adorable but rambunctious twin toddlers were asleep in their beds, and there were no little feet running around the bedroom next door. No tiny hands opening the door and slipping out, or at least trying to. That was a relief. Sophia loved her daughters to death, but she also liked sharing her bed with her wife only, and Marilyn was simply incapable of telling their twins no in certain situations. If they barged into their bedroom, demanding to sleep in their bed, Marilyn would undoubtedly let them.

Turning off the light in the bathroom adjacent to their bedroom, Sophia was ready to slip into bed and just sleep this strange and depressing day off. But instead of being welcomed into her bedroom with her wife either sleeping or getting ready to go to bed, she was welcomed into the bedroom with Marilyn kneeling on their bed, wearing nothing but a lacy thong. Her iPad was covering her face, screen facing Sophia. Pictures of houses were flashing on the screen periodically.

Sophia couldn’t help but laugh. She quickly stopped, fearing that it’d wake up their twins.

“What are you doing?” She asked after clearing her throat a few times.

“I’m trying to seduce you. Is it working?”

Sophia would never say no to seeing her wife naked like that. She was a pervert when it came to the woman of her life and she’d shamelessly admit it. But right now, she wanted to cuddle to her and sleep.

“No. That thong is cute though, where did you get it?”

“I’m not telling you, you’ll try to buy it for yourself.”

“Because it’d look better on me. Move.”

Sophia slipped under the covers. As she laid there, she could feel her entire body relax, sink into the mattress and the pillows. The tension in her upper back and shoulders were dissipating at light speed. She needed a day off to go to the spa, have someone massage the tension out of her shoulders.

Sophia could’ve fallen asleep right away if it wasn’t for Marilyn being stubborn in her silly ways, which was damn adorable. She placed the iPad above Sophia’s face then tapped her wife on the shoulder like a child in dire need of attention.

“Pay attention to me,” Marilyn said in a whiny tone.

“I always pay attention to you.”

That’s why Marilyn was spoiled, especially materialistically. If the designer clothes, the fancy cars and the luxury condo wasn’t paying attention to your wife’s materialistic desires, Sophia didn’t know what was. Marilyn was, in a way, an over-glorified sugar baby.

Sophia still sat up, took the iPad from her wife’s hands. Marilyn hugged her from behind, draping herself all over the artist manager. Sophia’s wife was dead set on getting a house. Sophia had assumed it was just a little obsession caused by too much time online and watching decoration shows, but no. It seemed serious. And when Marilyn seriously wanted something, she was stubborn and unshakeable.

Still shamelessly practically naked, Marilyn waited for Sophia to say something. She nuzzled Sophia’s neck.

Sophia grinned a little. “Jay says you’re a gold digger.”

“She’s absolutely right. Also, she gave me the name of a realtor.”

All the houses Sophia saw fit Marilyn’s mommy desires: large homes with backyards just as large, luxurious garages with space for many cars, at least four bedrooms (and many bathrooms) and a big fancy kitchen where her wildest dreams of cooking big meals and baking extravagant cake would come to fruition. Each kitchen was large with a sitting room, meaning she’d have the power of baking while watching Netflix. It took Sophia a second to see that the list was long and would only get longer over time.

“We don’t need a house.” Especially with the price tag for each of the offered house so far. Sophia almost choked when she saw her wife’s desire to own a ten-million-dollar home. In what fantasy world did Marilyn thought she lived in and why had Sophia enabled her greed for years?

Besides, they had a condo that worked perfectly well for their small family. Three large bedrooms, one that had been converted into an office, indoor gym and pool, garage space both inside and outside. Their twins had space to run and play and no neighbour was complaining. If Marilyn needed anything, she had the option to drive for less than ten minutes regardless of her destination. The house was not necessary and wouldn’t be until their twins were old enough for kindergarten. Even then, Sophia was willing to say that they could stay here longer.

Marilyn was not sharing that idea. She whined again, a sound that usually would’ve annoyed other people, but made Sophia just terribly happy.

“We can’t live in a condo forever!” Marilyn said.

“Why not? I thought you wanted to live in the delights of LA.”

And had been picky about the condo too. It had taken a lot of _late-night_ negotiations and compromise before settling for their current home. Sophia would’ve been fine living in a small apartment and save money on mortgages, but Marilyn needed to have her way.

“That was before I became a mother and realized that my babies deserve a backyard.”

Sophia had to quietly laugh. She put the iPad on the nightstand.

“Go to the park. It’s a public backyard,” the head of Managold said. She was so tired; she wanted this conversation to end. She wanted to cuddle to her wife and just dream about living in this condo forever so even her dreams could piss her off.

“What about the days we can’t?” Marilyn grabbed the iPad and scrolled down her selection again. God, she was practically drooling as she looked at the pictures in front of her.

“Then they’re probably the days you can’t go to the backyard either.” Sophia laid down again. “Plus, some of these have pools. What if one of them falls in and drowns?”

“We’ll baby proof the backyard until they can swim. With a fancy fence with an alarm and stuff. I’ll hire a nanny. I’ll put chains and duct tape on the doors.”

Sophia sighed. After more insisting from Marilyn, who had an answer for everything and had promised Sophia that she had done her research, she lost her convictions. She couldn’t refuse anything when it came to Marilyn. If her wife wanted something, then she was most likely going to get it unless it was outrageous. Even then, Sophia wondered if she’d have the strength to refuse.

“I’ll think about it.” The best and worst thing to say to anyone. It was a way to buy yourself a little bit of time before having to face reality.

Not tonight or tomorrow or soon though. Sophia was just too busy dealing with the rot that had set in her management company. First, there was Jade. She had become a bland and tasteless piece of cake to deal with. All the drive and creativity had been sucked out of her and Sophia was sincerely considering moving on to someone else if that continued. Jade was either depressed about Tori or something else. Either way, it was hard to plan anything with a popstar who just went with the flow instead of against it.

“Yes, thank you! I love you so so much!” Marilyn hugged Sophia. “Maybe we’ll get an even bigger house once you make Tori a superstar.”

Right. _Tori_. She was also an issue. Not directly, but rather in the way she had left a stain in Sophia’s company that was still indelible. Tori was a mess, a strange persona, absolutely delusional. It annoyed Sophia that every time Tori was on the edge of something important but scary, she retreated into habit, into a comfort zone. Then she’d spiral, as if panicked and suddenly aware of her behaviour and what she was potentially giving up on, and she’d act stupidly. The last stupid thing she had done had embarrassed everyone at Managold and now the atmosphere was heavy, awkward. Maybe it wasn’t Tori’s fault, but rather the fact that she was the example of the rotten industry they worked in, how desperation and envy and greed would drive anyone towards anything even if embarrassing.

Sophia felt a warm hand on her face, which made her jolt out of her thoughts. She turned to look at Marilyn, who had changed already. Finally, in her sleepwear, Marilyn turned off the lights and dove under the covers. Instinctively, Sophia wrapped her arms around her wife, took in the floral smell of her lotion and favourite night perfume. Silky hair tickled her face and she finally felt at peace.

“Did something happen? You were all serious earlier. You can always tell me what’s wrong.”

What wasn’t wrong? Sophia was an adult so that was wrong on its own. Then she was a manager in the marvellously disgusting world of entertainment. Then she had to deal with Jade, and she had to deal with Tori, and she had to deal with her business and so much more things. Most of these things were none of her wife’s concern. Marilyn was blessed to be able to just be a wife and mother who lived in luxury.

“Just…” Sophia couldn’t keep all the drama to herself. Her partner was a sucker for gossip and drama. “More Jori drama.”

The redhead heard a gasp. She could just feel her wife’s adorable smile in the dark, if that was possible, and no doubt using the strange name Marilyn had created to summarize that whole Jade/Tori debacle was a bonus to the mother. Marilyn loved the mess.

“I’m still so confused, you know? I gave her a chance and she boldly told me no. Then she comes back and just begs and expects me to have pity,” Sophia murmured, feeling Marilyn stroke her back.

“Oh my God, I wish I had seen it. Ugh, just picture it and the faces of everyone…”

“I was there. She kneeled in front of me, almost kissed my shoes.”

Marilyn squealed. “This is so great! And Jade? How is Jade?”

“Jade is boring now. I’m losing motivation to do anything for that brat.”

Marilyn giggled.

“It’s like separating two middle school besties. Of course, one of them is going to be depressed.”

Yes, of course. Sophia had expected Jade to be bitter. But to the point of losing her focus on her comeback and be mediocre? That was unacceptable.

“I’m not a teacher, I’m not a babysitter either.”

“But you’re a mama…” Marilyn said in a singsong tone. “And a great one.”

Sophia smiled at the compliment.

“I need to keep a reputation,” the manager continued. “I can’t play cat and mouse with a grown woman who just doesn’t know what she wants. I’m not going to hold Tori’s hand and guide her like she’s a child. I already have two.”

Marilyn asked, “So I may never go to a Tori Vega concert?”

“I doubt it.”

Sophia heard her wife sigh. “That’s too bad. Would’ve been fun to see.”

Was it? Who wanted lifeless work?

“It’s exhausting, Mari, to deal with this. It’s childish stuff.”

Tori didn’t know what she wanted, Jade was lying to herself for whatever reason and Sophia was stuck cleaning the mess. Was this what she had to expect when her own daughters would reach the dreaded teenage years?

“Maybe I shouldn’t have broken them. Maybe they just weren’t ready…”

Sophia felt Marilyn’s hands on each side of her face.

“Don’t say that. You broke them for a reason. A very good reason. But I know things will get better. They always do. You just need a plan and I know you, my little she-devil, will find one.”

Marilyn kissed Sophia gently, her lips warm and tender. “Then you’ll make more money, buy me a house, buy me a new car and make love to me every day until we die of old age at the same time.”

Sophia smiled.

“I love you,” she whispered, feeling better.

“I love you too.”

With one last kiss, they both went quiet, both on the edge of slumber. Sophia herself was about to fall asleep when she replayed in her head her wife’s sweet words.

“Mari?”

“Yes?”

“I’m not buying you a car.”

Marilyn’s giggle echoed in the bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. If you did, leave a comment and kudos (if you haven't already). Stay tuned for the next chapter!

**Author's Note:**

> Be sure to leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed it, and stay tuned for the next chapter!


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